For my first decree I shall order that all NYC buildings have roof gardens to improve air quality. It won't work if only some buildings do it so the occupants of any building that resists shall be executed by being locked in a small room with an idling taxi.
For my second decree, 10% of all income generated by Madonna, 50 Cent and Bruce Springsteen shall be dedicated to funding composers and artists who are great but aren't going for mass appeal.
For my third decree, all pedestrians shall be forced to carry at least one cheerfully colored balloon. I like balloons and you can't mug someone if you're carrying a balloon because you need one hand to hold the gun and the other to take their wallet and you'd only have one free hand because you'd be carrying a balloon so crime would go down.
My forth decree is that anyone who allows their pets to breed while the animal shelters are still overflowing with homeless pets goes straight to the gas chamber, front of the line.
For my fifth decree, at least 50% of all TV commercials and Broadway shows must be atonal.
For my sixth decree, the Pledge of Allegiance shall be replaced by John Cage's 4 Minutes and 33 Seconds. That way our school children can be patriotic and observe a moment of silence at the same time.
For my seventh decree the National Anthem shall be replaced by the opening movement of Pierrot Lunaire and all school children and baseball fans will be required to sing it. I could continue but the point is that democracy would never even vote in these modest societal improvements so how can we expect to ever be anything other than "underground" in this system? And now it's time for simultaneous orgasm.