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magickarpediem

28 M Oakland, CA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 5:47pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Asian, White
Height
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
Drinks
Desperately
Drugs
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Sagittarius, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from space camp
Job
Art / Music / Writing
Income
$100,000–$150,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Likes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), French (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Sarcastic, tsundere, sanguine, sombre, and semi-nocturnal.
What I’m doing with my life
I like to think of myself as a digital Don Draper. At least that's what I tell HR when they accuse me of being an alcoholic.
I’m really good at
Karate, jujitsu, driving like a gangsta when I'm coming to see you. Just kidding; I don't drive.
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm left handed. My tattoos. I have a love/hate relationship with fashion. I like to think that I dress well, but that's debatable. My wardrobe ranges from contemporary menswear to post-apocalyptic goth ninja shit. It's kind of hard to find a middle ground between these dichotomies so I tend to just go all out in either direction. I post a bunch of selfies on http://www.instagram.com/andymai if you're into that sort of thing.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
The Fifth Element, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Gattaca, Firefly, Star Trek, Starship Troopers, Miyazaki. The Large Hadron Collider turns me on. In my fantasy world, Carl Sagan, Stephen Hawking, Elon Musk, and Neil deGrasse Tyson are my gay dads. Winter is Coming. I would probably be a neckbeard if I had the capacity to grow facial hair.

Depeche Mode, Crystal Castles, David Bowie, Royksopp, Disclosure, Die Antwoord, The Faint, Grimes, Simian Mobile Disco, The Knife, The Glich Mob, Clean Bandit, Purity Ring, Disclosure, Hot Chip, Chromeo, Ronald Jenkees, Lorde, Chvrches, Tegan & Sara, IAMX, Hipster shit. Goth shit. Experimental shit. Occasionally trap shit.

I will eat anything except natto.
The six things I could never do without
The internet. I'm outdoorsy in that I like to get intoxicated in scenic places, but if I'm away from the Internet too long, I'll start fading away as if my parents never hooked up when they were 21.

Shoes. Some people talk with their hands; I talk with my feet.

Whiskey. Neat.

Pepcid AC. I got my DNA profiled and it told me I have an alcohol flush reaction. No shit, Sherlock. Pep helps me look like a normal human being during social situations which is already hard enough as it is.

Staying up late. Wearing all black.

Sleeping in. Brunch is served at 2PM.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Inhabiting someone else's body would be sweet until the moment you realize your mouth is full of their spit.
On a typical Friday night I am
◦ Going to a show.
◦ Dancing.
◦ Working on my resting bitch face.
◦ All of the above.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I shave my armpits because eww.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 23–40
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
◦ You can tell me a joke that'll make me groan.
◦ You are a strong independent woman who don't need no man.
◦ Your BAC consists of at least two significant figures.
◦ You wear Rick Owens or want to wear Rick but can't afford it.
◦ Danger is your middle name. And 'Wet Floor' is your last.
◦ You are taller than me wearing heels.
◦ You've ever seriously tried to do a kamehameha.
◦ You have a pug. I cannot stress this enough. I will also settle for a shiba inu.

But really I'm just here to expand my social circle and meet cool people.