I'm not summarizing myself. It's demeaning. And I'm best experienced in person anyway. Haha

The most interesting thing about me: I walked from Buffalo to Mexico by myself.

Yes, really.

Right now I'm a cook (it's a fun job, but it doesn't pay what it should) and about to start working on my Master's in English in January. Overall, I plan on teaching high school English, but I'm sure as shit taking the circuitous route. Oh well, life is more fun that way. What's the hurry?

Making you laugh. Without really trying. I've been told repeatedly throughout my life that there's something really wrong with the way my head works. Perhaps. But who wants to be... normal? Normal is awful and boring. Fuck that. Really I just see things differently than most people (often bizarrely so), and if you can manage to not take anything I say too seriously, the odds are I'll put a pretty big smile on your face. Even if it's at someone else's expense (No one said it would be a guilt free smile).

Humor and intelligence. And my pretty, girly eyes.

I read a LOT. Compulsively, even. 3-4 books at a time. If it had more adverse side effects I'd need help. My favorite book is probably Beloved by Toni Morrison (a completely typical answer from a mostly white, straight guy, I know), but the best thing I've read recently if The Book Thief by Markus Zusak. If you read, you have to read that book.

Movies are like crack to me. It would be almost impossible for me to pick a favorite. I have a huge movie library and go to the movies all the time (I try to go at least once a week). Sometimes I just go by myself and see whatever happens to be playing next.

My "it" band right now is Foxy Shazam. Hadn't heard of them until I saw them at Warped Tour a couple weeks ago, and they floored me. They are absolutely incredible. I'm actually listening to them right now.

I'm a fan of really good music and usually don't get caught up worrying about genres. My favorite song ever is probably Juicy by Biggie, (Al Green's version of For the Good Times, Bad Fish by Sublime, The Beautiful Ones by Prince Blackened by Metallica, and Jane Says by Jane's Addiction all also rank pretty high). My favorite album is probably Sublime's Sublime (... And Justice For All by Metallica, Illmatic by Nas, The Undisputed Truth by Brother Ali, and Purple Rain by Prince would round out the top 5 off the top of my head). I'm about as big a Prince fan as a straight man can be. Haha. As with everything that interests me, my taste in music is all over the place. My neighbors probably think I'm schizo. Oh well, fuck 'em.

Nothing. I'd get by.

And yes you could do without your phone. I promise.

Infinity. With regards to time and space. It keeps me up at night sometimes. It's just such a bizarre concept.

The giant, gaping holes in the big bang theory, as well as several more subtle problems with Einstein's theory of general relativity (the math works, mostly, but there's no logic to it, and most of the observable emperical experiments seem built to fit into the theory, as opposed to built to identify scientific truth).

The innate failings of the two party political system.

The inherent fallacy of the capitalist/socialist economic binary. Really, the fallacy of this/that binaries in general. The world is so rarely black and white. But people find differentiating between shades of grey tiresome and confusing.

Sex.

What penguin tastes like.

People keeping midgets as pets.

You know what, it's probably best for you to stay out of my head for now

Oh, you don't wanna know. I can be such a homebody loser sometimes. Haha.

I like being bitten.

Also, if you leave this box blank, or write a cop out answer, then it tells me you're a wiener. And I have no patience for wieners. Taking yourself that seriously is a deal breaker.

you're bored. we'll have fun (not necessarily "fun"; just... fun).