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19 F Portland, OR

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
5′ 4″ (1.63m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Aquarius, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of two-year college
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t want kids
Dislikes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly)

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My self-summary
I am cynical, or bitter, or maybe just tired. I am in the midst of 'overcoming' 3 years of clinical depression* and facing my tenuous and intermittent 'happiness' with equal parts‡ excitement and apprehension. Where to go from here? Maybe make an account on a dating site in hopes that I can find some friends, activity partners, motivation.

What else? I have roughly 18 stick n poke circles tattooed on me. I have a cat. I like cats a lot. I used to think I could be one when I grew up, but I'm still figuring out how to make that work. Most days I spend a pathetic amount of time on the internet, but if you met me on the street I'd pretend I have a full and interesting life. I want to make that reality. Wanna help?

* I don't mean to mention it here, really, but it has so consumed my life these past few years that I don't know how to talk about myself without mentioning it.
‡ not actually equal parts. way more apprehension. or, like... terror.
What I’m doing with my life
trying to get into art-figure modeling because it sounds like a fun way to make money / saying that I'm studying to be a library assistant through PCC but actually panicking last minute and dropping all my classes when each term comes around / spinning wool sometimes / intermittently working on a myriad of projects that I will never finish / lying in bed staring at the internet / slowly starving to death / thinking about getting a job at a sex shop.

I don't mean to sound so negative about it all.
I’m really good at
Logical solutions to other peoples' tangible problems. advocacy. Sorting things. Filling out paperwork. Managing medications. Petting cats. crying.
Maybe drawing and writing and adventuring.
The first things people usually notice about me
my clothes are probably dirty.

also, as people go, i think i'm relatively nonjudgmental. about certain things, anyway. i am not easily shocked. i know that's a total profile cliche, but it's true, okay? i suppose it's only something people notice when conversations stray into areas where they would expect me to react negatively or something. it's 3am. i'm tired. i'll rewrite/delete this later when i can see straighter. but, like, tell me all the horrible things you've done in your life and i'll probably tell you it's okay.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Writers: Steven Brust, P. C. Hodgell, John Steinbeck, Douglas Coupland, Tom Wolfe, William S. Burroughs, Junji Ito, Roald Dahl, Sherman Alexie, Bill Watterson...

Movies/Shows: Naked Lunch; Enter The Void; Adventure Time; The Mentalist; The Good Wife; Harold & Maude; Requiem for a Dream; Natural Born Killers; Firefly; most things directed by Larry Clark; Born Innocent; Thelma & Louise; He Died with a Felafel in His Hand, Falling Down...

Music: Dead Moon; The Mountain Goats; Leonard Cohen; Lhasa de Sela; Nina Simone; Suzanne Vega…
The six things I could never do without
A door to close.
My bed.
Unfortunately, probably my psych meds.
Someone to take care of me.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
how to make money without working customer service or doing pornography.
what's wrong with me.
the ideal way to format this profile (how the hell can I make proper footnotes on here?)
How to get out of bed and what to do if I manage it.
On a typical Friday night I am
Most likely I'll be online, mindlessly wasting time in a way that only the World Wide Web can provide.
Or, occasionally, I'll be out wandering the city, or painting a picture, or sitting in an all-night diner with someone I just met.
Chances are, whatever I'm doing, I'll be up until dawn. Or maybe not. Sometimes I go to bed at 7pm.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm terrified of everything.
I’m looking for
  • Everybody
  • Ages 18–100
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends
You should message me if
· You want to talk with/to/at me.
· You know about interesting places in this city that I don't. Maybe you want to explore them with me. Abandoned forgotten spaces...
· You want to play board games with me.
· You want to do crafts or make art together. I'd like to sit around a proverbial (or real) fireplace and make things with someone else.
Maybe something else! Who knows! Be interesting, be real. Involve me in your project. Teach me new things. Tell me stories. Help me get out in the world. Let's remember the things that make life worth living.

I'm in a monogamous relationship and have no interest in cheating on my partner, so nothing sexual.
And please don't lecture me on "all you do to get over depression is…", believe me, I've heard it all.