Please read the whole lengthy, verbose, well-written profile, or you'll likely be in for a shock that will be no ones fault but your own. That last guy feels pretty dumb for coming on to me after only reaching the bit about video games from long ago, and staring into my myopic eyes on his screen.
Of note: I have weird health stuff going on, but it'd be cool to meet someone with the patience to get to know me. Regular dating isn't happening here. That's probably a good thing.
Hello, pretty people. Please don't write me asking for casual sex. I have a lot more to offer than my body, and naughty messages from strangers don't turn me on. Those of you with both lust in your loins and intellectual curiosity in your minds can "holla at your girl" as the children say in the street. Word. Y palabra.
Yo no quiero fotografías de tu pene. Las otras mujeres no los quieren, tampoco. Ponlo en tus chones, por favor. Gracias.
I can't hang with people who use illegal drugs, abuse prescriptions, drink heavily, or have a criminal record. This helps to keep my drama levels low. I graph that shit.
Now that we've narrowed it down:
I'm a tall, curvy lady with a slight New York accent and a curly 'fro. I'm an unabashed progressive living in a very different place than my home of Fairfield County, CT. It's warmer here.
Highly opinionated, but I have friends of all stripes, and I don't go about arguing my agendas. I'm more likely to find common ground.
I'm super silly, but know when to be appropriate, and lady like. I'll cross my legs, and only then will I burp.
I enjoy reading, writing, and looking at the Internets. There's so many topics on my "to learn" list, so I find that I'm reading the Internets quite a bit lately. Magical tubes and wires!
I want to learn how to play D&D. I consider the previous sentence to be my nerd summoning spell. I don't care which edition, darling. I don't know the difference.
I kick ass at Jeopardy. Double Jeopardy not so much. Not so much. I'd probably own pub quiz if I bothered to go to pubs. I don't bother with pubs because I don't drink. No, really. I know that phrase means "kind of, sort of, only vino/homebrew on Saturdays with the right mood" to most people, but I'm on medication, so make me an Italian soda instead, please.
I'm told that I'm a great friend, and a good listener. Strangers will often divulge their deepest secrets to me. I feel like a secular confessor at times.
I rarely eat meat, but think the term "flexitarian" is rather odd. I am an ex-vegan, and a current salad enthusiast. No iceberg, ever.
I was a Girl Scout for about 11 years, which led to my cookie addiction. I'm not ashamed. I need some Samoas, but everything is fine.
I adore puppies and it seems the feeling is mutual. Children usually dig me, too.
ENFJ, or maybe P. I want to rescue you, and I know my way is best. I'm also a Pisces with Leo rising. Seems about the same to me, but it apparently matters to many of you. Rolling Stones > Beatles. Whatever.
I have an Afro, a cane, and a limp, but I'm not a pimp, and the instrumental intro to "Freddy's Dead" does not play every time I get up to walk.
I have a political issue with diamonds. I don't watch romantic comedies. I'm deathly allergic to seafood, and fairly allergic to roses. In my opinion, this makes me the perfect girlfriend! OK fine, so it just means I'm inexpensive to care for, and fairly low maintenance. Same thing! Hooray!