Additional Note: if you don't feel like reading a lot of blah blah text, scroll down to the "On a Friday Night" section and read from there to the end. Those few short paragraphs should give you a pretty comprehensive sense of my personality.
Oh, and read the paragraph directly below first, under the "About me:" heading.
I have a moderately awesome life – reasonable material comfort, a job I really like that is walking distance from my home, and a group of good friends. I'm also in a committed long-term relationship that has been open for a little over two years. That seems like a good place to start. I wouldn't say this is the most important thing to know about me, but it seems significant in this context.
I'm looking for friendship with the potential for some non-platonic fun (key word "potential"). I'm not interested in shallow or perfunctory, and connection is key, but I don't think I'd be a good match for someone focused on finding a potentially serious relationship.
I'm more interested in the person than the situation, but practically speaking dating someone who is also attached, or relaxed about monogamy if single, is probably easier to manage and more likely to occur. There's never a guarantee, of course, of having other things in common, but a shared viewpoint on "alternative lifestyle choices" could be useful.
So, boring faceplate info covered, I can tell you more about what makes me me.
I consider myself a feminist and it's a fairly foundational part of my identity (you don't have to identify that way, though feminists are sexy!). In terms of general stereotypes, I'm a downtown, lefty, mostly vegetarian urbanite; I like books, travel, wine, dancing, electronic music, and spending time with a circle of close friends. I'm a bit introspective and have some geekish interests, but that's fairly well-balanced with an active, adventurous side.
Managing simultaneous thought and/or sensory processes
Juggling: In truth, I'm not really good at it, but I can handle the 3-ball routine. No knives or chainsaws, though
Mapping out the dynamics of closed social systems
Listening (really a subcategory of observation)
Maintaining my balance, literally and figuratively
But when people do notice me, the features that are generally mentioned are my eyes (which has always sounded a bit cliche and insincere) or my tattoo (when it's visible). Gay boys have tended to comment on my hair or my butt, but I honestly haven't been hit on by a guy in a while so take that comment with a large grain of salt.
I am a semi-voracious reader, but a significantly less enthusiastic consumer of TV and movies. That said, I usually check out a few TIFF movies each year (though not this past year).
Book-wise, I tend towards conceptual rather than visceral, writing, both in fiction and non-fiction. I like fantastical concepts, and so a lot of my favourite authors are genre writers. These include Neil Gaiman, William Gibson, Jasper Fforde, CJ Cherryh and Terry Pratchett.
Some more literarily respectable books I have liked are Regeneration by Pat Barker, Headhunter by Timothy Findley, and 100 Years of Solitude by Marquez. I don't honestly read a lot of 'realistic' contemporary fiction; I am/was a big fan of Jeanette Winterson, but I haven't ready anything of hers in a long time so that may no longer be accurate (2015 Edit: I recently picked up one of her more recent books, I'm looking forward to getting reacquainted). I quite liked much of Fall on Your Knees by Ann-Marie MacDonald but I ultimately found it too bleak to finish. I know, I know, feel free to hurl tomatoes in my general direction.
I like non-fiction a lot too, on a variety of topics.
My music tastes are a mix of old-fashioned and modern, delineated more by category than individual artists. For many years my primary musical interest has been techno. I haven't kept up with popular music trends outside of the techno world in the last several years, but I quite like Florence and the Machine and Bat for Lashes. They're semi-contemporary, right?
Some kind of tool for creative/intellectual output (pen and paper, computer, cuneiform tablet, whatever...)
A sense of possibility
Genuine human connection
Occasional alone time
- ways to improve democratic governance and decision-making, so as to achieve better outcomes and more equality, while maintaining a reasonable amount of freedom and individual incentive (despite thinking about it, I'm not coming up with any great new ideas...)
- why one of my cats occasionally jumps into the air in front of the front door and bats at the doorknob; does he think he can open it?
- why so many people seem to be so emotionally invested in superficial elements of existence (not excluding myself from that statement)
- what my next volunteer commitment should be and am I being too picky for something that should be about helping a worthwhile cause
I'd probably be up for doing almost anything, generally speaking, if it promised to be interesting. I'm willing to be spontaneous (alternate explanation, I'm lazy and a poor planner).
I assume anybody who actively dislikes animals must be emotionally disturbed in some way; if they ever try to explain the rationale for why they don't like them, I then assume they are aware of and are trying to cover up their underlying psychopathology.
...notwithstanding that comment, if you're on the fence about messaging but you have a dog, you should *definitely* message me.