Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


49 Vallejo, CA Woman


Similar users

I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 30–50
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 1:16pm
White, Other
5′ 6″ (1.68m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Other, and laughing about it
Pisces, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from two-year college
Rather not say
Doesn’t want kids
Has cats
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Life is an amazing gift
Even though it seems like a trial at times
The path is full of twists, turns and mystery
One never knows what the lady has in store
And the ride is seldom dull
What goes out to sea comes back on the tide
when you least expect it
A happy treasure in a field of sand -LM

And, I mean every word of that!

I recently moved from Oakland to Vallejo. I don't know how long I will stay here, but it's working for now. I still spend a great deal of time in Oakland, Berkeley, Emeryville, Alameda, etc. And some in the city and peninsula so pretty much anywhere in the bay area is workable for me.

I have a regular client up near Mendocino / Fort Bragg and am living up there as much as half the month. I am smitten with the Northern California Coast, always have been so I am really enjoying spending so much time there. So who knows, although OKCupid seems to have very slim pickings up that way. I would love to connect with other musicians up there also!

And now, I’m just going to throw random facts, thoughts and quotes at you. Duck or catch, that’s up to you!

Chase the sun around the world
I want to look at life
In the available light -Neil Peart

--I am indeed , "bigger than a bread basket." I am however, much smaller than a linebacker, and much more lady-like!
--I'm attracted to honesty, humor and kindness and people who are comfortable with their uniqueness!
--I have a generous number of amazing friends, I can call, “close.”
--I see very few things as black or white. I see many things as shades of purple!
I am perplexed by finding out so many people I'd be interested in dating have had crushes on me, but are afraid to ask me out. I find it hard to believe I am that intimidating, but there it is. *sigh*
--I was born blonde Now most days I sport a much more colorful look.

I own a specialty pet care business.
I also do personal organizing, interior design and tarot readings.
I'm a vocalist, an artist, a writer and occasionally, an actress.
I hand-craft soap and perfumes.
In the past among other things, I've had my own mobile bar, worked in restaurants, art galleries, was a licensed optician, a barista, worked for a bankruptcy trustee, and a veterinary assistant.
I love what I do and I'm really good at it!

--I only speak English and “Sailor,” fluently. Despite my frequent use of expletives, however, I could wash my mouth out with soap & clean up for tea with the queen (or your mom) in a pinch. I know what's appropriate.

---I am pretty much an open book, but some of the pages are meant to remain a mystery until I find the right reader.
--I may message you if I like your profile, even if I don’t think we are compatible, If you message me, sincerely, I will respond.
--I have 2 guitars, but don't know how to play them. (This is on my "to learn" list.)
--I have had a boyfriend and a girlfriend. (at the same time even) A side note-I have had successful polyamorous relationships. I consider myself bisexual, but haven't met the right woman for a while.
--I've never been to New York City or Las Vegas!
--I want to visit ; Spain, Portugal, New Zealand, Greece, Egypt, Morocco, Turkey, Scotland, & Costa Rica.

Why I’m here:
--My friends nagged me into it.
--“New friends and activity partners.” Yeah. I like that description.
--I'd love to meet some compatible men for dating.
I am not interested in first date sex, casual hook ups or one night stands! Repeat I am not interested in first date sex, casual hook ups or one night stands! In case you missed that I am not interested in first date sex, casual hook ups or one night stands!
--I am open to just having some fun, but I want to get to know who I'm intimate with. I'm interested in seeing someone regularly if I like them.
--I'm not actively looking for the BIG relationship, but if the right one comes along I'm ready for commitment!
--I'd love to meet someone who will introduce me to new things and share some of the things I love.
I'm focusing on moving more slowly when it comes to new people. I like sex, a lot. Moving too quickly in the past has impaired my judgement and wasted my time. Sometimes I make a point to go slower when there is definite chemistry. I may not even kiss you on the first date. This doesn't mean I move at a glacial pace but it means I want to get to know someone and have a bit of genuine affection and build some trust first. That leads to better sex anyway.
--And yes, I have answered a lot of the questions about sex on OKC, but privately because they're none of your business until we start to get to know each other.

I like a lot of things! However; DISLIKE:
--People who make promises they can't /won't follow through on
--Narcissism & Arrogance
--Disrespect (this is not the same as irreverence)
--Judgmental attitudes; bigotry, cruelty, injustice, religious extremists and those who try to force their beliefs on others.

And, Dating Site DISLIKES:
--Messages with generic content, "hi" or some brief comment. I will just block you and move on.
--ARE YOU INTO? (fill in age, ethnicity or fetish here) questions as an opener. YAWN
--Married (not separated) men asking me out. when it is not a consensual poly situation.
---Men whose profile pictures are obscured, just torso shots, have a bunch of shots with women hanging on their arm and no explanation, I mean what the? Also when every profile picture of you is you on a mountain, in front of a famous world monument or doing sporting activities it makes you look like a bit of a braggart and also as i you expect me to do all these extreme sporting adventures with you. Nyet!
Which brings me to this. I am a soft and curvy gal. Some days I wish I could change things about my body but I've accepted my limitations and that it's unlikely I will ever be skinny again. I'm ok with that. I am not motivated to join a gym. So if you are looking for a workout buddy or someone to go running , biking, skiing, climbing, jumping out of a plane with, I am not your gal. I am game for most anything else and not only sedentary things; travel, getting out in nature, dancing, movies, restaurants, libraries, museums, live music, volunteering, brainy things, riding on the back of your motorcycle.....that stuff, I'm in.
--The questions on here! Oy! They always have either/or answers, especially when it comes to sexual compatibility. Yes, I occasionally like to have my hair pulled during "sexy times" but the question only asks me if I love it or hate it. I am kinda with Mae West about most things in life, "I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure." It all comes down to 1) chemistry) 2) Communication 3) Really knowing your partner 4) Trust!
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Laughing because "Staff Robot" frequently tries to set me up with my friends.

Pretty much whatever pleases me within the confines of my budget. Perhaps you'd like to help me with that? ;-)

“My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure it out. What am I doing right?”
― Charles M. Schulz
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Tripping over invisible things!
Laughing with regularity!
Making pancakes!
Forgetting people's names!
Sticking up for the undercat!
"The rubbing and kneading of muscles and joints of the body with the hands, esp. to relieve tension or pain."
I'm told I'm really good at making people feel comfortable. (Unless they want to date me, evidently)
Making a mess!
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Their dog, cat, bird or pet that doesn't like anyone else will probably like me
I hear, "I like your smile!" and "You smell good!" a lot!
Other things you might notice about me could be summed up by the following quotes:
--Cultivate your curves- they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.- Mae West
--I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It's probably the most important thing in a person.― Audrey Hepburn
--I’m capable of giving you a compliment and being completely sincere about it. ― Chloe Neill
--I never met an Innuendo I didn't like!-Lorelei Moon
--Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. ― Oscar Wilde
--Go on, say what you want. ... Whatever it is, say it to yourself. The truth will set you free. Either that or it'll get you a punch in the nose. ― Nick Hornby
--I kid, I kid!- Triumph, The Insult Comic Dog
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
My interests in everything are wide so usually I find something in common with almost everyone.

Food? I likes it! Lots of different kinds! I was a vegetarian for a long time and I don't eat a lot of meat now.

I’m an entertainment omnivore (I used to use "eclectic, but appropriated the omnivore descriptive from someone who was too chicken to date me and supposedly too attracted to me to really be my friend. Ha Ha Ha. Take that!)

I generally enjoy things based on what they are, not on what I think they should be which means I can enjoy a serious art flick, an action flick or a silly comedy equally well. Yes, my movie collection contains bot, White Chicks and Wings of Desire.

There are few things that bore me completely;
mainstream hip hop, the overuse of dub step, most reality TV, Ayn Rand and America’s obsession with Stephenie Meyer’s Toilet series, er I mean Twilight series. I’m with Steven King here, “Both Rowling and Meyer, they’re speaking directly to young people. … The real difference is that Jo Rowling is a terrific writer and Stephenie Meyer can’t write worth a darn. She’s not very good.”

Yes, I do like poetry. My favorites; Rilke, Collins, Naruda and Rumi.

Favorite writers include Jonathan Carroll, Thomas M. Disch, Margaret Atwood, Ha Jinn, Peter S, Beagle, Cervantes and Neil Gaiman. Also Jenny Lawson's, Let's jut Pretend This Never Happened is my favorite book to read to friends right now. It is even funnier than most David Sedaris shorts! If you like to be read to or to read to each other, I'm your gal!

The best first page of a book EVER is Tom Robbins' Jitterbug Perfume! Michael Chabon's, The Adventures of Kavalier and Clay kind of saved my life when I was going through a rough patch. I got to tell him that and it made him cry, I used to have a massive home library full of real books. I miss that.

Music. I like a lot of different things. My Google play could throw you Ella Fitzgerald one moment and Gojira the next.I do love a lot of prog rock.
-Rush is a band, not an overblown right wing radio personality
-Porcupine Tree is not a Tree nor is it made of Porcupines
-Even in death, Gary Moore is the Lord of the Strings.

My favorite movie is Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai
"I'm not going to kill you but I don't have to save you!" from Batman Begins is one of my favorite tag lines.

My go to cheer up stuff to watch: any episode of Red Dwarf, Ed or Northern Exposure, the first episode of Black Books, The World's Biggest episode of Corner Gas. Envy, Summer Rental, The Majestic, Bowfinger, The Princess Bride.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I recently saw a profile where someone said, pliers. That was brillient and so true!

Six things? Very clever, OKC! Obviously I can't do without oxygen, water, sleep, MAGIC and food. Duh! I'm sure that wasn't a very original pithy answer. Why six? Why not 8?

Here are more than 6 things I could do without, but my life would be kind of sucky without them!
1)My voice. I'm a singer/songwriter. I was unable to sing for a couple of years because of a then undiagnosed health issue and I was miserable!
2) The number 8 and also the number 17. When you add the digits in 17 together you get, 8, which makes 17 even more endearing. A slightly elongated 8 turned on its side is called, a lemniscate, and is a symbol of balance and infinity.
3) Going without certain foods makes me sad. I dated a guy for a while who wouldn't eat, avocados,mushrooms, bread, spicy food, cumin seed, peppers, fish or nuts. It was one of many reasons I was happier NOT dating him. I also used to joke that I worked at a restaurant just for the free avocados!
4) Ready access to a wide variety of books; old favorites and newcomers! (And access to an equally whopping variety of music!) I lost a library that too me many years to fill and it made me appreciate why I might want a Kindle, but I still prefer a real book!
5) My wonderful friends and making new ones!
6) My kitty. Oh, excuse me, THE KITTY!
7) Brains, sexy, sexy brains. (But not to eat) Brain sex is just as fulfilling as physical sex and both are good for your health!
8) Being near both the ocean and the trees!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Whatever amuses me or vexes me as it passes through my head. Most likely something really random like:
Should I start a service that helps guys get decent profile pictures on dating sites?
Do vegans who wear silk, realize where silk comes from?
Why are humans so wonderful and also so shitty?
I wish I had my camera right now!
ooh, KITTY!
What would Cthulhu do?
Why are chinchillas so soft?
Do I really need to, "Mind the gap?"
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Ha! There is no such thing as a "typical" Friday night!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm Batman
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you actually made it all the way through this weighty tome, er I mean my profile.
If perchance you are that magical combination of fictional AND real life characters that would make up my "perfect" man; Oz from Buffy, Ed Stevens from Ed, writer Jonathan Carroll, writer John Green, Khyan Mansley, Craig Ferguson and zefrank, with a disarming smile like Hugh Jackman, but maybe not as pretty.
Or if you are NOT, but you are YOURSELF!
If you think I'm interesting. Tell me WHAT about me you thought was interesting!
If you think I might find you funny, interesting or intelligent.
If we have things in common!
If you are interested in friendship And/Or dating.
HOWEVER, you should NOT message me if you obviously haven't read my profile, are unamusingly lewd, rude or completely inarticulate!
You should also NOT message me if you are only interested in hooking up, one night stands, casual sex (or if you are looking for someone to repair your computer.)
I am unlikely to answer messages with generic content, "hi" or some brief comment.
If you say you liked my profile but don't elaborate, I'm going to assume you didn't read my profile.