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29 M Denver, CO

My Details

Last Online
Today – 1:09pm
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Full figured
Strictly anything
Pisces, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of space camp
More than $1,000,000
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Likes dogs
English (Poorly), Afrikaans (Fluently), Ancient Greek (Okay)

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My self-summary
Alright, someone has to prove to me this site is more than just girls taking gratuitous cleavage shots in the mirror to attract the Brad Pitt's that aren't on here. I enjoy a good cleav pic as much as the next guy, but come on, you're just asking for hundreds of creeps to message you...

...which brings me to, well, me.

I like all the typical manly things: grilling meat, hanging sheet rock, wrestling a bear naked in the woods, nailing sh*t to walls with a high powered pneumatic That's right, a guy who can tolerate shopping, it's amazing! Just don't start pushing your luck with some death march endurance trip through the mall and we'll be fine.

I know girls like a guy who is funny, so I diligently scour all the best joke books Barnes and Noble has to offer. Did you hear the one about the two peanuts walking in the park? One was a salted. Awful story I'm afraid.

Oh right, here are some of my references in case you were wondering:

"Outstanding, a great experience!"
- Tonya H.

"Truly epic! One of a kind!"
- Sonya S.

"Four Stars! Wonderful production values!"
- Roger Ebert (RIP sweet prince)

If you haven't noticed by now, I've been on this site long enough to not really take it seriously anymore. That said, if you actually are a nice, down to earth girl that's legitimately looking to meet a good guy, send me a message, or respond to mine when I come a creepin'.

Also, be sure to look at my pictures, although I'm more than just a piece of meat to be stared at.
What I’m doing with my life
Working for the man....and a few women
I’m really good at
Filling out dating profiles.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
TV - Mad Men, The Office, Big Bang Theory, classic Seinfeld, Breaking Bad

Music - Mostly classic rock, but also some newer stuff like The Black Crowes (if you consider 90's to be new)

Movies - I can watch just about anything
The six things I could never do without
- Family
- Friends
- Music
- Crap, I'll think of three more...give it time
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Three more things I could never do without

Also... why is cheese so good?
On a typical Friday night I am
Fighting crime. Like Batman. In the nipple suit.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have a bigger crush on The Gos than you.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 20–31
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For casual sex
You should message me if
You have a compulsion for danger and like a guy with super powers*.

*super powers on a first come, first served basis and are subject to change