Trying to give the online meat-market a complete self-summation is a pretty humbling task. Sometimes I think that enjoying the process of filling out profiles means that I'm completely self-obsessed. NO NO IT IS INTROSPECTION I SWEAR

About the "available". I have a boyfriend(djspaz). He is rad. We are non-mongamous and have been since the beginning but we're pretty particular. I've got another fella (Zyvod) who's really important to me too. My dance card is fairly full so I'm not actively looking but I am always prepared to be blindsided.

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I'm in my early 20s, I work full time as an inside sales agent. I know everyone my age is a student or at least a graduate with a bachelor's degree but I didn't want to waste money and time going to school for something I didn't feel wholeheartedly passionate about. I did two years in English Lit at Kwantlen and it was interesting but not for me.

I am completely addicted to tattoos--I've sat for at least 20 hours at this point and plan for a lot more coverage. I have a sick, twisted sense of humor and I live for the absurd and whimsical. Life doesn't make sense anyway, even when you break it down to the most bare and scientific parts... So we'd best make a go at enjoying the complete bizarreness of existence.

When it comes to the earthy and erotic, I'm a minx, an aesthete, a sensualist sex kitten. I'm also a safer sex queen and if you ever wanna get me in a naked state, you'd better be too. But I would definitely wanna know you in a social way before I know you in a biblical way. :P

A word about my orientation --- I seem to switch it back and forth on here quite a bit as I fear being a "trendy bisexual". I'm very attracted to individuals as opposed to particular groups and I am very aroused by self-assuredness be it male or female but I have a tendency to prefer 'masculine' traits. I'm a bit of a boy myself, though biologically female.

Here's a pretty good indicator: If you think this is too much reading, we won't get along. Especially now that I've pared it down!

I guess I kind of answered that above. I have a home, a job I (usually) enjoy, an extended health plan, good friends, a wonderfully happy romantic life,interests and a family that doesn't make me gag. I figure that I'm doing okay!

I'm very musically and artistically inclined. I'm not an amazing bassist but I work really fucking hard - what I lack in talent I make up for in enthusiasm. I played for a year and a half with the retarded/fucking awesome Dreadnoughts (http://www.myspace.com/vancitydreadnoughts) but left because I'm too big of a pussy for their touring schedule - my liver lets me down big time. I want to start a cabaret/revue night that'd run monthly or biweekly that would have a rotating cast of weirdos performing music, comedy, burlesque and drag. "The Tragedies of Terminal City" or something!

Reading people, singing karaoke, cooking, massage and other types of touch, discussing/debating things fairly 80% of the time and devolving into a feral shouting match the other 20%, sketching/cartooning, writing music, playing bass (okay, I'm average at that), making up silly songs, remembering lyrics from songs and dialogue from films.

My ink, freckles, smile, stature. Maybe the fact that I'm usually laughing uncontrollably. My tendency to be incredibly tactile. That I talk way too fast.

(A) American Gods, Anansi Boys, Neverwhere, Coraline, (Neil Gaiman) Good Omens (Gaiman and Terry Pratchett), pretty much everything by Nick Hornby, Alice Sebold, Douglas Coupland (though I found jPod really tedious as with Eleanor Rigby),David Sedaris, basically everything that the halfway hipsters are reading these days. I really dig fiction in general as well as travelogues (Bill Bryson), and sexuality books (Susie Bright, The Ethical Slut). A really great 1-sitting read: Candy Girl by Diablo Cody. Even if you hated Juno. I promise. I'm also totally addicted to graphic novels and comics, my favourites at the moment are Preacher and Transmetropolitan and I'm dying to get Lost Girls (it was too perverse even for me-thankfully my roommate owns it and I didn't have to spend 90 bucks to find that out)and Lucifer. Y: The Last Man. God, I'm a nerd.

(B) Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Shortbus, Secretary, Juno, Everything is Illuminated, Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, anything Tarantino, many things Rodriguez, Kevin Smith's Jersey saga, Little Miss Sunshine, anything with Bruce Campbell and many many others.

(C) David fucking Bowie, Tom Waits, Queen, Rancid, Amanda Palmer,The Dresden Dollls, The Creepshow, The Rolling Stones, Lucinda Williams, Stan Rogers, The Pixies, Jonathan Coulton, Stiff Little Fingers, Primus, The Red Hot Chili Peppers, The White Stripes, The Talking Heads, Regina Spektor, The Matadors, The Arcade Fire, Reverend Horton Heat, T.Rex, Strapping Young Lad/Devin Townsend Band, The Ramones, The Clash, The Pogues, Dropkick, Gogol Bordello and all damn kinds of old-time rock and roll. I also enjoy the Dreadnoughts, but this is entirely self-serving.

(D) Indian, Japanese, Italian, Mexican

(E) Comedians! Patton Oswalt, Bill Hicks, Brian Posehn, David Cross, Mitch Hedberg, Russell Peters, Maria Bamford, Sarah Silverman, Zach Galifianakis, Eugene Mirman, Michael Showalter/All the Stella guys. Dane Cook sucks my imaginary dick. Poorly. Like he copied it from someone else.

Aside from the essential things for human life?

Music, laughter, human touch/closeness (yes, this includes sex OMGLOL), great films, mild intoxicants and diet fucking pepsi.

The present. The future. The past. My place in my social circle. Trying to put my love in all y'all. Music.

Lately, it's mostly evenings in. We are in a recession, guys! Thankfully, I get a great deal of joy out watching pirated tv shows and getting high and snuggling with one of my lads. I am certainly learning to appreciate the simple pleasures - my cooking abilities are improving rapidly since restaurants are too damn expensive now. Hey, maybe I can cook for you and then you will totally be besotted with me! And my balsamic demi-glaces.

I secretly (not so secretly) really want to be a Mrs. Robinson type to someone, without the mind games and weird incest overtones. I totally want to take a young-but-legal-aged virginal nerd/geek and teach him the ways of the world over a weekend. I think this comes from having been an awkward geek myself. I wanna be the lady a lad remembers on his 80th birthday.

You're relatively well-spoken, you're confident, happy with who you are and who you could one day be and also if you think that my "tatts are wikked sweet" and perhaps you have some of your own. If you're looking for mutually beneficial experiences (not just fucking, you animals! but sometimes.) without the contraints of a traditional monogamous relationship. If you want the best friend you've never had yet.

I'm personally either looking for new friends or someone to date casually. I'm not really looking for any more long-term tertiary partners but I wouldn't resist it in the right circumstances either. (ARE YOU LISTENING, HENRY ROLLINS?)