I have an odd and fairly dark sense of humour that often confuses people. I'm virtually impossible to offend. I can almost cook. I tried to teach myself Russian once, when I was in my Russian literature phase but it's really hard. I used to do slightly stupid things to win bets but now I'm a grown-up. Other than that I'm trying to dedicate my life to the arts and anything else that has no use for violence and exploitation, and other slightly preachy activities. I kind of wish I could be a master carpenter in my spare time, like Nick Offerman. Actually I think I just wish I was Nick Offerman...or Tom Waits. He doesn't have have a moustache though and I'm not sure he has any carpentry skills...owns a lot of horses though. Tom Waits is a massive dude.
The term 'dark horse' has been applied to me on several occasions. For reasons that I don't fully understand. But if you're welcome to investigate and report back.
I suppose any further questions can be referred to Thirdwoman23, with whom I am in an open relationship.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm completing a phd in philosophy and literature. It's sort of
about literature and politics and Samuel Beckett. From there who
knows. Post-doc, teaching, building a death star, perhaps. I guess
I'm just doing what I'm best at and seeing what happens. Let's just
see if I can reach some goals and successfully navigate the vicious
politics without being transformed into a manticore and destroying
a small village. It turns out the spell check on Google doesn't
recognise the word manticore. That's pretty disappointing. If you
Google the word manticore they suddenly know exactly what you're
I’m really good at
Writing long essays and pretending to know what I'm talking about.
Drawing stupid pictures. PUNS!!! I used to be ok at soccer too.
With each year that passes since I stopped playing, the better I
remember myself as being. Right now I was ok. In another 30 years
I'll have been a scandalously magnificent lion-swan amalgam that
caused women to swoon and grown men to weep bitterly into the
I have a needlessly good long term memory and a terrible short term
seriously expert level cynicism. The good kind. Diogenes style
cynicism, not the other kind which actually just means being
selfish tool which is what real cynicism was invented in response
to. These things matter.
I have also have a terrible short term memory...my apologies.
Endless ranting involving archaic references to things like
manticores that provoke blank stares from people I haven't known
long enough to get away with without them clearly trying to decide
whether or not I'm a potential organ thief.
The first things people usually notice about me
How should I know? Although my default facial expression seems to
be a mix of sad/grumpy and stoner. Complete strangers have walked
up to me in the street and told me to cheer up and/or asked where I
get can get good weed. Despite growing up in the mountains I have
no idea where you get weed from. Not sure why I didn't just become
a stoner, it seems like I always did all the things you do if you
are, except the fun part.
Also, I have unusually soft hands. Seems to be a bit of a talking
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
As far as books go, Samuel Beckett, William Faulkner, Mark Strand,
Dostoevsky, Martin McDonagh, Chuck Palahniuk, Kurt Vonnegut,
Virginia Woolf, Homer, Joyce, Kafka, T. S. Eliot, ...and the list
goes on forever.
I love the films of Terrence Malick, Wes Anderson and Steve McQueen
(the director no the actor so much). There Will Be Blood,
Sightseers, Seven Psychopaths, Cold Souls, A Man Escaped and so
I spend way too much time searching for new music for someone who
doesn't actually work in the industry, most of what I listen to is
made by reasonably depressed French-Canadian Jews, i.e. Godspeed
You! Black Emperor, A Silver Mt Zion.
I love The Mighty Boosh, The Thick of It, Breaking Bad,
I really don't care much about food. And, frankly, I don't
understand why that always seems to generate so much consternation,
as though I'd just said that I sleep upside down like a bat or that
I'd just claimed the ocean doesn't exist.
oh except for some reason lately i developed this weird addiction
to bagel chips. It makes no sense, they're not even good.
The six things I could never do without
Wine, books, French-Canadian Jews...i think that's pretty much it
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Well, my thesis. I guess there's not that much else at the moment.
Well I mean other than Tom Waits. I once had a plan to make a wee
little picture book for my friend where you would get rescued from
under an upturned desk by Tom Waits and his gravelly voice. But I
never found the time. I like to imagine that he really does live in
an abandoned fun park. Come to think of it, I like to imagine I do.
I bet you do now that you think of it.
On a typical Friday night I am
Building a time machine. It's really easy when you come back from
the future to tell yourself how to do it.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have no idea of tumblr is. There, I said it. Probably spelled it
wrong too. Don't care.
I also have a bit of a man crush on Daniel Day-Lewis.
You should message me if
Maybe you also think horse racing is stupid and would like to
Are you are a seven foot tall imperious Aztec warrior maiden from
the moon, timeless and unsullied?
You're ok with the fact I'm in an open relationship. It's not for
everyone but it works for us.
Do you sometimes feel as worn out as orphan's suitcase, and
sometimes sit in the darkness, full of nothing but bagel chips and
Or maybe, you know, you just feel like it.