Trying to get back to being fit by dragging my sorry ass to the gym
every once in a blue moon.
Stop Press. Sorry ass now much reduced after repeated draggings to
Further stop press, sorry ass now positively gorgeous after a year
of dragging, well done ass.
Update. Ass now not sorry at all, going out for dates on it's own
without me. Come back ass, sorry I called you "sorry".
Me: "You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar, when I met
Ass : "Either way I knew I'd be a much bigger star either with or
Me: "Don't you want me baby, don't you want me oohh."
Further Update: Ass now has it's own recording contract with Simon
Cowell - well it can sing a lot better than most of his acts.
Status update: Ass now has it's own Facebook account with more
friends than me, I tried to friend it, but it blocked me.
Ass taken out a restraining order on me. I can't come within 100
yards of it. This is making life very difficult.
Ass now got it's own book deal, writing a 'tell all' about it's
life of abuse with me. Think I need a lawyer