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monkielove

35 F Port Republic, VA

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 10:27pm
Orientation
Gay
Ethnicity
Black, Native American, White
Height
5′ 5″ (1.65m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
Sometimes
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sign
Taurus, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Other
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
**UPDATE may 2014: i've just relocated to rural virginia after living on the west coast (seattle, olympia, portland with frequent travel to san fran, vancouver bc, and LA) for ten years. i am looking for my people. are you a, shall we say, "cosmopolitan" type? reach out and touch someone!**

a friend once laughingly called me a 'hater'. i don't think i 'hate' so much as that there's just so much ridiculous shit to point out in our time. reality tv shows. opposition to marriage equality. the biebs. new laws passed before our very eyes that take our rights away while most americans remain blissfully oblivious and happily entertained with beyonce and football games. ha ha ha. hater.

the point being that: touch/sex-positive writer and social chameleon seeks collaborators for subverting the establishment, bar stool philosophizing, creative endeavors, adventure, and general low-key mayhem.

my personality can probably best be described as what would happen if 1) a 13-year old boy who woke up one morning inside a busty woman's body, 2) a snarky and cynical old queen past his glory days, 3) your anti-government survivalist uncle, and 4) dorthy day all got together and had a baby. i recognize that reading peoples' profiles can be a lot like reading the ingredients on a box of processed food and trying to imagine what it tastes like; nevertheless i'll do my best.

i'm an introvert that plays the part of extrovert well. friendly and easy to talk to. unafraid of risk. literate. often mistaken for younger than i am. has fingers in many pies. largely incapable of small talk (i can do it but for me it's only foreplay to get to the good stuff). constantly in a state of trying things on. craves intellectual stimulation.

i'm sensitive to the cruelty and suffering in the world. awed by the beauty occasionally demonstrated by humans. searching into the future. haunted by ghosts of the past. highly emotionally developed. a big soft, wet, gooey heart, but i won't show it right away. striving and wondering if i'll make it. am i a lion disguised as a mouse, or a mouse disguised as a lion? is enough ever enough?

conversation is my religion.
"when two people relate to each other authentically and humanly, god is the electricity that surges between them." -martin buber
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
i used to be very ambitious. lately, i feel that the most distinguished degrees are at best only buttresses to prop ourselves up and the most lucrative career in the world pales in comparison to the comfort and joy provided by a community of true friends. or as j.r.r. tolkien puts it: "if more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world." so the best thing i have found i can do for myself is to thoroughly enjoy my life and imbue everyone i touch with the feeling of having been loved, embraced, and understood. that sounds like some major hippie shit but it's what's real.

likes: kung fu flicks, puppies, a good piece of garlic bread, puns(!), sunrises, backyard fires, stand-up comedy, warm mud between my toes, bubble baths, endorphins, sharing a laugh with strangers, morning sex, zombie movies, waffle cones, pink monster trucks.

dislikes: too-cool-for-school people, pickles, apathy, rules, "authority", evangelists, a punch in the face, callousness, endangered species poaching, class warfare, aggressive spiders, shitty drivers, shitty roommates, dog shit on the sidewalk.

*what i am LITERALLY doing with my life:
setting myself up to be in a good position to leave the country and perhaps never come back... this is a 1-3 year project. working, working on myself, making archery equipment, writing, reading, spending time with my ailing grandparents, bodybuilding, eating tons of organic produce, researching grad schools, and expanding my skill set.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
writing. choosing the slowest line in any retail establishment. steering a car with my knees. making others feel comfortable. wrestling dogs. saying it like it is. meeting people. sneezing several times in a row. tending to people who have been overlooked. kissing. communicating fully yet kindly. laughing at inappropriate times. dancing to phat beats. being good to others. not getting offended. dipping my hair into whatever i'm eating. finding the word you're looking for. composure under fire. finding the shoes i want cheaper online. handling my anger, and yours too. massage. being present. getting distracted. communicating with the insane. looking extra fly when i wanna. following recipes.

i'm really bad at:
math. dealing with bureaucracies. spelling "bureaucracy" (i have to look it up every damn time). juggling. being nice to men who continue to harass me after i've already told them once, politely, that i'm not interested. keeping plants alive. smiling on cue for the camera. being patient with automated phone systems. remembering names. remembering MLA formatting. remembering your birthday. giving a shit about pop culture.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
well, let's be honest, i have big tits, so depending on what i'm wearing, those are probably in the top tier. my dreadlocks also get a lot of compliments.
i have also been described as a "badass" and a "do-gooder," as well as "bootylicious."

on a side note, a boy i once dated said i was "like a fucking unicorn," shaking his head in awe. i think what he was referring to was my intriguing mix of feminine and masculine qualities... i never had a dad and thus never learned the boy-girl dynamics game, so i am the type of lass who loves to sew, dress up purty, care-take others, and has a hearty feminine lust for sensual pleasures, and at the same time i will drink you under the table, throw a football around, chop cord wood, and back you up in a bar fight.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
i've been on a fiction kick, enjoying the hell outta some george saunders. other authors i've been enthralled with at different times of my life were stephen king (angry teenager), jeanette winterson (just came out as a lesbo), david sedaris (partying and sleeping around), and barbara kingsolver (embracing my womanhood, or something). as far as non-fiction, some of my recent favs were "the new jim crow", "sex at dawn", and "in the realm of hungry ghosts" to name a few. currently reading "on anarchy" by noam chomsky and "how to win friends and influence people" by dale carnegie. i hope to be a full-fledged social engineer by the time i'm fifty.

tv- some all-time favorites are THE WALKING DEAD, orange is the new black, sons of anarchy, true blood, heroes, the office, family guy, the daily show, lie to me, strangers with candy, parks and recreation, drawn together, archer... you get where i'm coming from.

movies- what can i say? i watch a lot but it's hard to thrill me.

music- i like almost everything (no heavy metal, christian, or contemporary country, thank you very much), but some fav artists have been bjork, ani difranco, massive attack, fiona apple, the roots, johnny cash, leonard cohen, the pixies, etta james, immortal technique, mos def, nina simone, imogen heap, philip glass, chopin, eric satie. i'm also guilty of loving mindless hip hop that i can shake my booty to (iggy azalea, i'm looking at you).
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
alone time. music of all types. books. exercise. nature. touch. healthy food. that's seven, but i'm a rebel, baby.

(runners up: the interwebs, a sense of humor, my homies).
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
the collapsing dollar, the future of the united states, what i'm going to eat for lunch, the creative process, women, social justice, how i can best be of service, money, DIY stuff, what i should've said instead of what i actually said, power tools, my next tattoos, human motivation, how drag queens do their makeup so much better than i do, the nature of reality, science, god, sex, what i should be doing instead of this.

(or should that have read "sex-- what i should be doing instead of this"?)
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
lately, working. boooo. i would rather be having a drink and a good conversation with a nice person like you. i'm also a huge fan of "quiet" (read: riotous drunken gleeful shouting matches) nights in playing taboo and cards against humanity.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
i have little concept of personal privacy.

unless you're the nsa.
if you're the nsa, piss off!
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like girls
  • Ages 28–45
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
what i want:
1) friends!! you should message me if we're over 70% match to one another. here's what i've learned in my several years on okc: regardless of if there turns out to be sexual chemistry, if you meet in person someone who's over 85 or 90 percent match, you have an instant rapport and an awesome new friend. and who doesn't want more awesome friends?

2) sexy connections...?
"hot" is overrated. me= sapiosexual. if someone can light me up mentally, the next stop is usually the bedroom, or the kitchen counter, or the living room floor, as the case may be. that being said, i'm feeling rather old-fashioned lately, so don't hit me up if you're just looking for a booty call. also: NO HET COUPLES. more power to ya or whatever, but that's not my bag.
*note: i'm monogam-ish... i only do open relationships, because life is short and connecting with people is fun. but when i find someone i like i am (mostly) satisfied with them.
**note also: i am mostly gay (in that i have only had love relationships with women) but i do occasionally play with dudes. i refer to myself as a sexual omnivore...i certainly have a favorite food (yum!) but i'll eat just about anything if i get hungry enough.

i've sown a ton of wild oats and am ready to commit to the right person. but in the meantime i'm having plenty of fun with the wrong ones.

be forewarned... poor grammar and spelling are anathema to me! (hiss!!!) if you don't know the difference between their, they're and there, stay away!