I'm Simon, a wannabe hairy biker, with just the cooking ability and the bike missing!

I'm a committed small business owner, battling the big guys for my own little niche in the geek market of dice, retro video games and tabletop wargames.

Making fun of a boring situation. I'm also awesome at bartering, and absolutely love my car boot sales, charity shops and auctions, though of course I don't get to haggle in charity shops and auctions :) I like taking photos for aesthetic appeal, and should do more of it!

Well, the general viking'y look is a given, and then after a while I've been told I have a good sense of humour, and a nice dollop of intelligence. I can also hold a decent conversation!

Bookwise, pretty much anything by Bernard Cornwell, I also got hooked on harry potter, although I'll admit I never finished the last one, for various reasons. I love The Hobbit, but never got into Lord of the Rings (the books, like all the films). Also Iain Banks has written some fantastic stuff, though I've never gotten into his sci-fi. I also read Bridget Jones Diary and the sequel, on a recommendation from my mum, which turned out to be quite valid! Oooo Ben Elton too!

On a filmy note, typical cheesy action films, preferably with comedic tones (loved the expendables, especially 2), SOME horror (not mindless slashers, do like event horizon for example), pretty much anything sci-fi, and those slightly out of the box films, e.g. argo (it wasn't great but I chose to see it!), goodbye lenin (which is a great film!). I do also have a soft spot for a good romantic comedy if I'm being entirely honest.

TV, I love Blackadder, Red Dwarf, Yes Minister (the old one), Monty Python and plenty of other things.

Music, I like a lot, mostly rock and metal, but also folk, occasional classical, electronicky stuff, and a spot of indie. Rammstein, Nightwish, Neil Young, AC/DC, Seth Lakeman, Cat Stevens, Mumford & Sons, Kate Bush, MGMT, The Corries, and Depeche Mode, off the top of my head, but many, many more too.

Food, I was vegetarian growing up, and still haven't quite got over how awesome bacon and steak are. I am still majorly squeamish about seafood, I really don't like it when my plate has something on it that can watch me eat it! Definitely a fan of your genuine gastro pubs, and more than willing to splash out on a lovely meal, but it had better taste good! Oh and red wine, delicious!

Given the right circumstances, I could quite happily live out in the middle of nowhere, or on an island, with nothing but food, warmth and cuddles :)

However, I'd definitely miss the joys of my interwebz, which I think is an amazingly undervalued invention, mostly squandered by those that use it.

So yeah, a desert island with food, warmth, cuddles AND broadband.

My plans to take over the world (in a business sense)
My perfect partner, and why the smeg she hasn't found me yet
What car to get next (I have a really boring car, and who says blokes can't think about cars)
The future of mankind, and how we can make it better. Always a good topic for conversation!

Bored, mostly :) Can't be doing with the whole going out and getting plastered thing anymore, I'm no longer a student!

That I think I'm the only bloke in the world who's feeling broody :)

Reading any of this made you smile :) It would also be good if you were good humoured, happy in your own skin, and have some ambition in life. Someone who's not afraid to come out and say it, whatever "it" is.