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mrsmitty2

25 M Paris, France

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 7:15am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Other
Height
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
Sometimes
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Judaism, and laughing about it
Sign
Scorpio, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from masters program
Job
Other
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Pets
Has dogs and dislikes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), French (Fluently), C++

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My self-summary
I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I’m bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.
What I’m doing with my life
I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don’t perspire. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes.
I’m really good at
Children trust me. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.

Seducing women with my trombone sensuous-like playing. I don't play accurately-any one can play accurately- but I play with wonderful expression. As far as the trombone is concerned, sentiment is my forte. I keep science for Life.
The first things people usually notice about me
When I eat brocolli I pretend i am a big dinosaur eating a tree.

When a person in a film is drowning, i immediately start holding my breath to see if i can last longer than the person in the film.

Sometimes I start doing things with only one hand in case I lose one of my hands in an accident.

Sometimes when i hit myself with an inanimate object, I hit it and yell at it for as long as it takes for me to think it got what it deserves.

I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami.

My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles.
I breed prizewinning clams.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor
-Hodor, Game of Thrones

Food: all of it, except bananas, can't trust phallic shaped food.

Movies: Vanilla sky
Jules et jim (who hasn't thought of a love triangle among friends?)
le dérnier metro
Casablanca (only possible scenario where you can say here's looking at you kid, without looking like perv.)
Back to the Future

Books:
Hopscotch by Julio Cortazar
The count of monte cristo by Alexandre Dumas
Any Jules Vernes
Les miserables by victor hugo
Candide by voltaire
The six things I could never do without
1- Coffee (although due to stress and over work I developed for quite some time now a condition where I cannot drink it without suffering stomach aches, I still drink though.)
2- Interwebz - because we no longer live in the stone age.
3- memes, why explain your humor with words when you can find a pictorical representation.
4- tweeting mean comments or in any other social media thing to people, why? because i hate people being overly sensitive about everything ugh, it should be number one but people would judge me, I know.
5- Disgusting Maruchan soup noodle thing, they are disgusting but they've been there in my most difficult times, so I let them tag along.
6- Cookies
I spend a lot of time thinking about
-The meaning of life of course and how to solve the crossword puzzles in the back of the cereal box.
-Why are there so many stupid drivers
-Sometimes when i'm thinking of something bad about someone i immediately think of something else before they can hear my thoughts.
-When peeing in public bathrooms I immediately start searching the ceilings and air vents for cameras.
- When i loose a strand of hair in the street and I throw it away, I begin imagining possible scenarios where a murder takes place and my stranded hair is found and analyzed for DNA purposes and it places me in the scene of the crime.

-To be natural is such a very difficult pose to keep up.
On a typical Friday night I am
Drowning me sorrows in alcohol
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail.
Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down.
I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–27
  • Near me
  • For new friends
You should message me if
If you're fun, I don't like boring people.

I like persons better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better than anything else in the world.