34 Chicago, IL
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
I've driven to Alaska, taught English to bored high schoolers in Poland, and won prizes for being a good contemporary classical musician in Germany, but most of the time I'm just the quiet person working at your neighborhood flower shop. I stay home and read a lot of books and pet my cat, except when I'm out drinking fancy beers that I don't really have the palate for (but I pretend!) or cooking foods that are probably just slightly beyond my practical skill set, because isn't that how one learns? I'm sort of reserved (sometimes) and sort of not (sometimes).

I've been everything from a nice gay housewife to an awesome single person to one-third of an open genderqueer poly triad and what might happen next is a complete mystery, but I always like making new friends. In any case, I'll probably bake you cookies if you're into that sort of thing.

I am kindhearted, bookish, and intentional
What I’m doing with my life
These days, I split my time between my day job as a floral designer and figuring out how to make unusual sounds on my viola that correspond with the unusual-looking notes composers have written for me. (Contemporary music=good times. Think walking into the MCA and hearing sounds instead of seeing art.) I like to think my two jobs inform each other, and that I'm more willing to explore my own creative desires in my daily life because of them. If I can make a bridal bouquet using kale and thistle and then go home and make a bunch of crazy sounds in complicated rhythms on my viola, what can't I do?

Otherwise: riding my bike, wishing I could go hiking, reading a wide variety of books, making to-do (or occasionally not-to-do) lists and then doing (or not doing) some of the things on them. Cooking. A lot.
I’m really good at
I recently described myself to a friend by saying "I'm bad at not trying new things." Which is kind of the opposite of what this question is asking, but also accurate.
The first things people usually notice about me
Meh, I have no idea. I use big words, but not really on purpose.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Ah, jesus. I've had an enormously long answer up for this question forever, but even I'm tired of looking at it. Abridged, then:

I love books, lots of books, about everything from the history of city planning to Nabokov to how animals survive the winter to "Mrs. Dalloway" to the history of roses to books about contemporary China to whatever. Kate Bornstein changed my whole worldview. I have ten bookshelves in my living room. Seriously. If you want a better idea of how I've been spending a fairly significant amount time, you can check out my Goodreads profile.

I also enjoy movies, a lot actually, but I have a hard time watching them by myself. Movie night? I'm all over that.

I tend to watch TV one show at a time all the way through, so my experience is limited but a tiny bit obsessive. I'm a big fan of Arrested Development, Joss Whedon, and sometimes when I'm really tired I end up watching old episodes of "Friends". Update: Twin Peaks ate some large chunks of my life recently. Probably literally.

Lately I've been listening to Queen and Beck's Midnite Vultures and Le Tigre all shuffled together, which I find to be the perfect combination of awesomeness, feminism, and funky raunchiness. Also, bands with cellos rock my world.

I like sushi, but I'm tired of jokes about eating fish. (Rimshot.) Still, food--which, for me, includes almost everything except meat (although I have nothing against carnivores, especially conscientious ones)--is pretty awesome. I love food so much that I once wrote a cookbook zine and made a ton of copies at kinkos and gave it to all of my friends.
The six things I could never do without
1) Books--I have... a lot of books, although I can't claim I'm even close to having read all of them. But hey, there's always more to learn about, yeah?

2) Engaging one-on-one conversations

3) Good transportation (my bicycle, my feet, the bus, etc.)

4) My viola, a.k.a. that whole 'being a musician' thing.

5) Natural places with few to no people in them (even if I can't experience them very often, I need them to exist)

6) Sensual experiences that remind me what my body is for, from sex to good food to hiking
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I once told somebody that potatoes reminded me of calculus. It still makes perfect sense to me.
On a typical Friday night I am
There is no typical. I might be at home reading or writing or cooking something far too complicated, quietly hanging out with friends, editing my ex-girlfriend's dating advice columns (because I'm awesome like that when it comes to exes) (and also, apparently, advice), or blowing into a slide whistle as part of my contemporary classical music group. Really.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
In thought: I have a little crush on Kiefer Sutherland circa 1987.

In deed: I have artsy naked photographs of myself in Arizona (with a cowboy hat) and in Alaska (there's a caribou in the background!), and there was also a recent indoor book-themed photo set inspired by Chicago's lack of good outside places to get naked for any significant period of time, especially when it's winter. (The books I posed with: Pat Califia's "Public Sex", Judith Halberstam's "Female Masculinity" and Italo Calvino's anthology of Italian folktales.) It's something of a tradition with my closest friends. We haven't yet been caught.

Also, very very technically speaking, Fleetwood Mac once opened for me.

In general: almost certainly more than you'd expect. It's sort of a thing for me, I guess.
You should message me if
You like talking about critical theory, passionate ideals, and people's sex lives late into the night.

I'm pretty willing to let interactions find their own level, whatever that might be, friendship or other. I'm sort of busy sort of often but if you're inclined, feel free to write me a message.

For the record, I have absolutely no problem with poly people, monogamous people, kinky people, vanilla people, variously gendered/identified people (trans, genderqueer, bigendered, gay, straight, bi, none of the above, more than one of the above, etc.), or most anybody who isn't a jerk. In fact, a lot of those things are things I include--in a positive way--when I say "talking about people's sex lives late into the night" (although sex is not, of course, gender), and at least a few of those words are things I could personally lay claim to, depending on which day you catch me on. Really, if you can make me bat an eye, I'll be surprised.