Some of my favorite quotes and some good advice.
It's easy to fail without trying to, it's not so easy to succeed without trying to.
"You only really fail when you stop trying."
Making a living has a bad habit of getting in the way of Life.
You are never so blind as when you look at yourself.
"You will never know how big of a shadow you can cast till you stand on your own two feet."
"Admit nothing. Deny everything. Make counter accusations."
Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.
"If the Ladies don't find you handsome at least let them find you handy."
"Men I won't lie to you, we're surrounded, outnumbered and low on ammunition; Don't let one of those Sons of Bitches get away!"
"If I've lost my mind that is between me and my mind."
Mental note to self, buy more mental ink.
"There is no insult when none is taken."
"Si vis pacem para bellum." If you want peace prepare for war.
Don't drive faster than you can see.
If you can't have fun with what you're doing, you are doing it wrong.
If you don't vote, don't complain.
Follow the K. I. S. S. rule. Keep. It. Simple. Stupid. I'm thinking of having this etched into my eyes so I can't forget it.
"When in doubt, attack!" Preferably with pie or water ballons.
Laugh, it kills time between disasters.
Smile, it makes people wonder what you are up to.
"Don't surrender freedom for security, or you have neither."
"Support your local sheriff" to keep the criminals (AKA the politicians) honest.
Support your local gunfighter to keep your sheriff honest.
Stay out of trouble if you can. Have a good alibi if you can't.
Remember the past, look to the future, but live in the present.
You are the star of the show that is your life.
Be sure you have good writers.
Someday in the future you may meet your past.
If you must smoke, please have the good manners to be on fire.
It's good to see your friends. It's better to be seen by them.
An endeavor should succeed or fail by it's own merrit.
A friend will help you move, a real friend will help you move the bodies and a Pal will help you make the bodies.
Some people have more dollars than sense.
Even when they are broke.
"When you no longer hear the wind call your name, it's time to make sure YOU remember what your name is."
"It costs you nothing to be polite."
Always and never have always been two words you should never use.
"There is always a faster gun." See previous statement.
If you can't laugh at yourself you are taking yourself too seriously.
"Parachutes? We don't need no stinking parachutes!"
Some people are willing to live for their ideals, other people are willing to die for theirs.
"Politicians prefer unarmed peasants, buy a gun, piss off a liberal."
Murderers prefer unarmed victims, buy a gun, protect yourself and your family.
Every day try to use your brain for something other than keeping your skull plates apart.
"Next to a woman scorned, Hell hath no fury compared to a liberal about whom or whose heroes the truth has been told."
There was an owl that lived in an oak,
the more he saw the less he spoke,
the less he spoke the more he heard.
Why can't we be like that wise old bird?