Now should commence the usual coating of one’s imperfections in many shades of honesty, sincerity, compassion, ambition, skill, a love for animals, the elderly, and the infirm, as well as the requisite marvelous cocksmanship. To be sure, I possess all of these clichéd traits in abundance (most men probably qualify at least some times in their lives), but I’m afraid that I really am a bit different from many Phoenicians. Before moving here in 2011 to do a PhD, I spent the previous seven years as a journalist and teaching journalism in Lebanon. And yes, I saw a lot of man’s inhumanity to man.
The 12 years before that I had lived in post-communist Europe; I arrived in 1992, not long after communism fell, and it was the best party I’ve ever been to. It was also an absolutely engrossing, three-dimensional, life-size, and real-time laboratory of all-encompassing social change. I spent 11 years in Prague.
I dislike starting so many sentences with “I”; I do yoga every day and went to an ashram in India and was silent. I don’t eat meat anymore. My bliss, however, is not total; I still haven't learned to love Republicans. I haven't owned a television in 20 years... I read a lot.
I teach and I study, but there is still time to go to the gym, run or hit the climbing wall just about every day. I play ultimate frisbee--what could be more granola? I’ve been told that I don't look my age. I feel like dancing most of the time.
If your hopes and plans revolve around the acquiring of much money, nice cars, a man who wears a tie and tinkers with things, that’s great; I wish you a big house in the suburbs with much lawn maintenance (please go easy on the water, though, OK?) and many renovation projects that you enjoy. I've always gotten along best with women who enjoy the humor of both Karl and Groucho Marx.
And no, I am not the arrogant, haughty type. I grew up in Milwaukee, for fuck's sake. Travel and clever stuff are great, but I'm rarely happier than when I'm drinking a good beer, laughing my ass off, and sorting out the world's problems. And then dancing. Awkwardly.
Grammar nerds welcome!