nestpasunprofil
52 Brooklyn, NY
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nestpasunprofil
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My self-summary
This isn't a real OKC profile - it's just a satire. It's here to amuse me.

I like long walks on the beach. Do you? Especially the ones where you get to witness a shark attack. Very romantic. Oh, and candlelit dinners. I'm equally comfortable in jeans and black tie. Or maybe I mean alienated. There must be a lot of frikkin black-tie benefits going on, that's all I can say, judging by people's profiles. Who are these people?!

I work hard and play harder. My glass is always half full. Should I buy a smaller glass?

I'm looking for that special someone, my partner in crime. What crime? I dunno. That's where you come in. I was thinking forgery, but my handwriting sucks. Anyway, like I say, I'm trying to find my soulmate, that one that can be my best friend as we share the joys and sorrows of trying to find a decent movie on Netflix or ungentrified 'hood in Brooklyn.
What I’m doing with my life
Living it to the max, baby! Like a character in a Beckett novel. Enjoying everything [fill in blank] has to offer.
I’m really good at
Space camp. No, it's true - I just dropped out b/c my professors didn't understand me. I'm such a geek!
The first things people usually notice about me
My Derridian post-colonial indeterminacy. Or my hump. It's huge!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I dunno, I'll fill this out later.

Some really hip stuff Murakami more hip stuff Radiohead Murakami hip so hip Bushwick gallery even hipper Gladwell don't call me a foodie vinyl Wes Anderson TED talks Murakami tragically hip Sedaris.
The six things I could never do without
Well, I dunno. But how about a euphemism for sex here?
I spend a lot of time thinking about
why OKC has so many questions about masturbation. What's the correlation between answering questions about wanking w/ finding someone w/ whom to have sex à deux? (Or for that matter à trois. Or à N, where N > 1.)
On a typical Friday night I am
"Typical"?! No one on OKC has typical Fridays! Generally I'm curing cancer, solving the Mid-East crisis, and kicking Putin out of Crimea. Other times I might be called in to sub at the Metropolitan Opera or do a quick spleen transplant at Lenox Hill. Although sometimes I like to just kick back w/ my iPad and a beer and show how bogus Andrew Wiles's so-called "proof" of Fermat's Last Theorem is.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Then it wouldn't be private any more!
You should message me if
you're carbon-based. And NO DRAMA, mkay?

BTW, I fibbed re my age, for search purposes. Although this isn't a real profile. Come to think of it, is any of us "real"? Aren't we just virtual scraps of performativity in the Foucaultvian panopticon - so who's counting?

Also, you'll note I checked "casual sex." When it comes to sex, I'm just not very formal. I tried sex in a tux once and, even though it's fun to say, the cummerbund got all - let us not speak of it.
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