I am a firm believer that people under 24 should not get married, not worry about serious dating, etc. because they're not done growing yet. The brain hasn't formed the final pathways until 21-24. They literally do not know who they will become. How can they hope to have a relationship that will last for the rest of their life?

A quick skim through OKCupid scares me a little. I met my husband here. In fact, it was less than 6 weeks from my account create to our first date. At that time, he had another profile, which he deleted in a fit of "all or nothingness," as he is prone to do. We were, if I recall correctly, somewhere between 86% and 94% matched back then. He was one of my highest matches.

We just celebrated our 1 year anniversary this spring and the 4th year from our first date last week. He later created a new profile for whatever reason, fun test, friends, you name it. Now it seems like every time I check in our match % is getting lower and lower. We're down to 79% now.

I know people change, they grow, that the challenge of a relationship is to grow together. But should I be worried? Should I try to change, to find out what he needs from me? Should just being me be enough and if it's not, so what?

I'm a little bit terrified right now. This is not an up and down thing. We have apparently been growing apart consistently since we met. At least OKCupid gives us a warning system that very few traditional couples get to have.

If I didn't trust OKCupid's math, I would not have met him, much less dated and married him. So to ignore the lowering percentages now seems a little hypocritical. I didn't even look twice at a 79% match when I was trying to find the right man for me.