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30 Minneapolis, MN Woman


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I’m looking for

  • Men
  • Ages 27–36
  • Near me
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 7:48pm
5′ 3″ (1.60m)
Body Type
When drinking
Capricorn, but it doesn’t matter
Working on masters program
Rather not say
Has dogs
English (Fluently), Sign Language (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I love my job; it is one of my favorite things. I also enjoy reading, eating, long walks with my dog, friendly gossip over beers, not being murdered, and knitting. It's not that I definitely don't want to date you; it’s just that I MOST likely don't want to. I also do not want to live in the closet where you will keep me and occasionally feed me table scraps, and I only put lotion on my skin when I can do so of my own volition.

I’m always very funny, but sometimes only to me.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Your mom.

I am always following the time tested philosophy of life: "Gas, ass or grass: nobody rides for free!"

I like to make up words and then fliselate them into a conversation to see if anyone notices. Not only do I get a fun joke, but people think that I am smart!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Telling long, boring, pointless stories that aren't necessarily connected in any way to the conversation they interrupt.

Being incredibly snotty and stuck up about things that other people look down on me for.

Knowing more than you about Star Wars.

Being very VERY serious all the time. Jk... But for real.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My peg leg.

Also I hate this question.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
My favorite food is everything... except for McDonald's pickles..seriously... why are they see-through?!? yuck yuck yuckity yuck. I'm currently hungry for spaghetti. Like... while writing this... It will probably have passed by the time you get here... I bet by then I will be hungry for BBQ potato chips or string cheese.

If given the chance I will always play Hanson's Mmmbop or Spice Girls (ANYTHING) on the jukebox at the bar.

Basically every movie I see is on my iPhone screen... So I guess you could say I'm something of a cinefile.

I love tv. If you say you don't I think you're a liar... Or a douche... Or both.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Rain drops on roses, whiskers on kittens, brown paper packages tied up with strings and whiskey...
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Whose job is it to make sure that the ketchup dispenser puts out the perfect amount for that paper cup?

Why does no one else talk about the fact that Orion is the best hung constellation: naked, hands flung in the air- forever streaking across the sky?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I think that Steve from Blue's Clues is super hot!
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You know a really funny joke.

... or if you have a habit of not knowing when you are the butt of one. I like those types too.