Thinking is a much under-rated activity, but there are times when one can think too much; this is clearly one of those times. Friends find my sense of humour passes them by, they either don't get the allusion or the point is not inside their horizon. In a group, I'm the one who pays attention to what others are saying and gets inspired to write a short story about it afterwards.

I'm pedantic, expecting you to have meant what you actually said but will be able to remember what you said next week and may well ask you a question about it. This infuriates my friends for whom life moves on much more swiftly.

I'm a daydreamer and will often stop in the street to stare at a tree for two minutes, or watch a bird flying overhead or the clouds on the horizon.

I'm also fascinated by how garments are put together and once got told off on a bus for staring at someone when all I was doing was trying to work out how a pocket on his coat was made.

I think people are basically bizarre and unknowable, contradictory creatures who say one thing and do another, profess one thing and act something totally opposite. Although experience has told me they don't, I still expect people to base their decisions on some sort of rational thinking process, and often I'm more concerned with that process than the actual decision itself; you can make any choice you want, but please do make it rationally.

I have no rapport with animals and fail to understand why anyone would want to share their house with a creature that messes on their living room carpet, even if it does have doleful eyes.

I am irstythumb, meborafe, and arsdefing.

I draw, paint, walk in the country, play flute and Sax, make my own shirts, design and make my own kites and go to work only to be able to afford to do these things in peace.

My house is not a soft armchairs and settee in front of the TV comfort zone, it is a drawing board and worktable creative environment with fabric swatches and half-finished pictures sharing shelf space with home-made kites, a chess set, Herodotus and a textbook on Elliptic curves.

Life is a process for passing on our genes; the rest of the time is for enjoying ourselves.

I'm a perfectionist; do something well or at least properly, or not at all.

I am not in the least bit interested in material possessions.

Getting on with something else. I'm really good at starting things but need a boot up the backside to get me to finish them. I tend to either plan so long that I never really get going or dive straight in and then realise I should have planned a bit first.

I'm also good at giving the impression that I know what I'm talking about.

A friend read my profile and said that in it she did not recognise the witty and informed conversationalist, the loyal friend and the talented and imaginative chef she knows. I worked as a chef for over twenty years so I am probably a better cook than you are. Interest dwindled a bit when I stopped doing it for a living but I have enjoyed rediscovering the sensual pleasure of eating home baked bread and cakes.

I am good at rustling up something interesting and tasty from whatever you happen to have in your cupboard. It's like Ready Steady Cook on viagra and my friends have come to appreciate that it is not easy but it is valuable.

The beard ?

A friend tells me to say "eyelashes". Mine are apparently quite long for a guy, and most girls would like die to have eyelashes like mine. I never knew that.

Food: I used to live to eat and relished the idea of visiting a new restaurant and trying new foods. I enjoy trying to perfect my recipe for fish Jalfreize, and my carrot cake is a thing of rare and signal beauty to be savoured on rainy Sunday mornings with fresh coffee. I like baking and my sweet pastry has been kissed by angels (which my rational side says do not exist. Go figure). I have also recently discovered how easy it is to make really delicious Turogomboc, a Hungarian sweet dumpling made with curd cheese and semolina - which probably makes them sound disgusting but they are terrificly more-ish.

Books: I suffer from a rare medical condition that makes it impossible for me to walk past a bookshop without going in, or to go in a bookshop without buying something; ergo, I own a lot of books. A current top ten would probably include lord of the rings, the dante club, the dive from clausen's pier, the highest tide, life of pi, young men and fire, the deposition of father mcgreevy, possession, huckleberry finn, from here to eternity, the time of our singing, cold mountain, snow falling on cedars, and so on. Norman Mclean, Richard Powers, Truman Capote, hmmm, seems I tend to go for American authors but I only noticed that while writing this list.

Non-fiction is an eclectic mix, the 9/11 Commission Report, The Selfish Gene, biographies, maths textbooks, and I'm on about my third re-read of Douglas Hofstadter's Godel Escher Bach from which I will eventually learn something though probably not very deep or profound.

Music tends to be something I play and make myself rather than something I buy to listen to, so anything made since about 1990 is likely to be completely unknown to me. I do have a CD by St Germain which I love and I have long been a fan of Buena Vista Social Club, but they are both much appreciated gifts rather than self-purchases.

I also tend to listen to the radio on the web - why buy a radio when my computer has a gazillion presets ? - which does have the side effect that if I am listening to a Turkish Jazz station or a Latvian Classical music station for instance, it is not normally possible to know whether the person speaking is introducing the next record or reading an ad for dental floss. So I hear lots of stuff I like without knowing who it is by or what it is called or having the inclination to find out.

I also frequent YouTube a lot and listen to tracks on there.

I think that apart from seeing amateur or semi-pro groups in wine bars and the like, the last time I went to see a professional gig was when I saw Simon and Garfunkel at Wembley in something like 1982. The highlight of this for me was watching Steve Gadd play the drum line of 50 ways to leave your lover, with one hand.

The cinema recently has been rather disappointing as far as new releases go - my local are doing a season of Classic movies which I have enjoyed seeing again - and the last new film I saw was a double-bill I treated myself to over the Bank Holiday. I saw Prince of Persia in the morning, which was an enjoyable bit of escapist nonsense, then saw Russell Crowe's Robin Hood in the afternoon. That was an interesting approach to the story, I thought, and Cate Blanchett's Marion was both a believable love interest for him and an interesting person in her own right which made the film much more enjoyable than I expected.

I don't have a TV, but do buy DVD's and watch them on my PC. Films mostly but the odd nature series.

A list of favourite films would take too long to write and to read, so I'll keep it brief with Miller's Crossing, True Romance, Chinatown, Once, The Last Picture Show and anything with either Humphrey Bogart or Clint Eastwood in it. I'm also a great admirer of Kevin Costner who might not be the most convincing actor but nevertheless seems to make beautiful movies that say something, Open Range being a case in point.

Coffee, peanut butter, the smell of new-mown grass, trees, paper and pencils for drawing with and, although I generally despise materialism, my flute.

If my house burnt down I would miss my paintings, but everything else is just "stuff". I guess I would need to pretty quickly get hold of some paper and pencils, because a life without drawing would probably be unbearable.

I spend a lot of time thinking about such diverse things as shirt interfacing and elliptic curves, the etymology of words, kite designs, how stuff works and recently, the first documented use of cotton in the United Kingdom (this is proving to be amazingly elusive) and the sex life of trees.

A recurring theme with me is also why there is such a huge gulf between what people say they believe and how they behave. Interestingly, my experience has been that the widest gap is found in those who claim to follow some religion or other.

Why do we not have a proper vocabulary for discussing how stiff a shirt collar is, or should be?

I am generally in bed by ten O'clock anyway, so what does the night mean to me?

Mornings are when it happens; I can get soooo much done in the quiet hours before dawn and sitting in my studio with a coffee watching the sun come up over the ocean is one of life's joys.

I also enjoy getting up early to take a flask of coffee down to the beach, where I sit with the wind in my hair and smell the sea and the stones as the sun comes up.

I struggle to answer the part of the question where it asks you how your perfect match would answer this question. I have no idea how she would answer the question because the truth is I have no idea what she is like.

Is she the kind of girl who wants to go camping with me and kite flying and country walks and bike rides in the summer with a picnic in our hamper, and running along the beach barefoot in the rain at four in the morning because its fun.

Or would she prefer to be at home finishing off those silk Jacquard cushion covers I started two years ago but somehow still seem to be "in the middle" of, while a cake and some home-made bread is finishing in the oven, so we spend our weekends going to craft fairs and jumble sales to shop for fabric samples and rare antique haberdashery.

Or is she the quiet, rational, scientific foil to my creative outlets who anchors me in a world in which you seem to have to have money in your pocket when you go to the shops. (Done that. It's not funny, except afterwards, when it just is).

The truth is, I have no idea. But what I do know is that if she were otherwise perfect for me but allergic to flutes, or colour blind, or could not stand the sound of a sewing machine I would give those things up in an instant.

What I do now does not have to be a part of what we can do together. So if you want to go Llama fishing in Venezuela or fog knitting in a Tibetan monastry don't write me off just because I didn't mention it somewhere else in my profile.

You should message me if:
You want to talk about something about which you are passionate, even if I have not mentioned it, I enjoy learning new things and considering new ideas and will talk with anyone about almost anything.

Or, you are Kate Silverton.

Or, you think you might be able to teach me to Tango.

Please do not message me if your mobile is listed as one of the six things you could not do without.