So, I'm left with the left out in the coldies....marv to the max!
Okey dokey, smokey. So....Moving on to the non-whiny portion of my write up, I shall say the following.
The short version
I'm an awesome guy. Six months from now, you need to be able to look back and say that you made correct decisions regarding things that affect you, long term.
Make a list of all the things you want in your next mr amazing. You just described me. Why am I single? I took a chance on a girl 10 years ago and broke a rule of mine. I am from a big family. With five kids and not much money we all learned to be unselfish.
We learned that you always, no matter what are a reliable team player in life and as a family.
In my experience, girls who are an only child or just one of two children are often selfish. Hey....hey....It's just my limited observation. Anyway, my kids' Mom is like that. And, of course her Daddy thinks she hung the moon.
She had an affair after making a long series of bad decisions. Our marriage ended shortly after I took the photo of her kissing another married man. That was four years ago. I haven't dated in two years.
And, honestly, I am like soooo stress free and happy.
I am way more nervous about having someone in my life because me and my kids are so happy and stress free.
So, no messing it up, please.
Longer version follows.....
The Oh My God Are You Serious?! Section
I am a very positive, glass will be completely full tomorrow because I will make it that way, kinda guy.
And I'm sooo sorry. I know this sounds super negative.
I am trying to actually want a girl in my life. And if it happens, everything that I have learned regarding how to be a great mate for you will be deployed...
BUT I have to tell you that you are part of a group of....I don't even know what to call what I am seeing out there.
Have you Thought of This:
Why would an amazing, unselfish Mom who respects her husband and is just a great person be single? Answer: She's not. So, what is left is the pool of misfits who weren't able to communicate, weren't able to be honest with their ex; and just gave up on the marriage.
Argggh! How depressing, huh?!
=> Please understand that you make mistakes. We all do. Many are no big deal. Some are a big deal. But, each mistake you make is your fault. The appropriate response when you make a mistake is "Sorry"
=> Any use of the following in your name is a 15 yard penalty for Personal Foul
Really?! Pretend like you just met your next Mr. Amazing. He calls his Big Sister or his Mom to tell her about the amazing girl he just met. What do you think the people who care about Mr. Amazing want to hear?
Those characteristics are what you should focus on for you. Not whether you have an oval on your back window with "26.2" written on it.
=> You carve a swath as you go through life. The people with whom you interact are affected by you. Do and say things that help others. Understand that much of the time, selfish people could cease to be around and have little impact on the world. But, giving people, kind people, and individuals with a magnetic personality always are missed when they are gone. Team sports are good for character. By the way, hugging a tree or being in the Peace Corp does not mean you are unselfish.
=> NOT ONE, ZERO, ZIP, NOTTA, NONE, photo of you that doesnt look exactly like you look NOW should be used. Period.
We don't want to see you in the Johnny Bench catchers position gleaming your gorgeous eyes into the camera if the picture was taken during your separation three years ago when you were 45 El Bees Lighter and two to three sizes smaller. It's not about what size you currently are. It's about honesty and trust!
- Are we superficial in physical desires? Not necessarily. It just takes a lot of effort to plan a night out with the chick we see in the Johnny Bench pose to find out that now we are meeting Tom Arnold's former wife.
- Would I have emailed you if you put a current photo of you up?
- No, probably not. But it doesn't matter. You and I are BOTH looking for a trusting, loving, kind, and caring mate. That person is honest, not dishonest.
=> You make mistakes! Period. Yes, YOU!
=> If two or more of the following apply to you, you are impossible to please. Don't waste our time. Stay single. Log off. If just one applies, the above sentence might still apply....we need to take you on a case by case basis
- You think your dad is the most amazing man that lived AND no guy will ever live up to him. Don't misunderstand me. My kids tell me this ALL the time. But for a girl to honestly think this and to hold all men to this impossible standard is....
- You think that the word "debate" is a descriptive word alluding to a fun, daily activity
- If you are older than 36, 37, 38 and you have no kids AND still want kids, remember this.
Let's say you really, really fast track this thing. So, BEST case scenario you are engaged in what...3 months? Best case scenario you get married in what 6 months? Coitus resulting in pregnancy seems like it only happens when you are NOT trying. So, you might not get prego for like 1 plus years....
We're looking at you withdrawing your 401(k) money, tax free the week of your son's/daughter's high school graduation.
Really?! I'm not sayin....I'm just sayin.
- Lying to your beau, in all forms (omissions including) is to a relationship the same thing that cancer is to the body. Only a matter of time before it destroys the relationship
- If you are older than 40 AND skinny (size 2 or zero) AND you are single, there is about a 99% chance that you are a "half bubble" off level
- If you tell me that I can pick the restaurant; that you are OK with whatever and then make an evaluative comment about my selection, then why did you tell me to pick the restaurant in the first place?
What's funny is I truly and honestly don't care where we eat. I just wanna sit next to you, put my hand on your inner thigh and stare into your eyes while you tell me your thoughts.
Why waste my time and ask me to pick when you are the one who cares? You don't need the picking of a restaurant to be a serendipitous activity where you get to tell your neurotic friend that I "get you." Just pick and wear a smile on your cute face and a thong on your cute butt. I'll see ya there.
- If you don't understand that to me, my kids are the two most amazing human beings on the planet, then under no circumstance of any kind should you and I be emailing, talking, or making plans of any kind.
- Please know the difference between Opinions and Facts
- Leave is better than cleave. If you cleave and don't think you do, no bueno there, Seniorita!
I am tired of this stuff. I've spent hundreds and hundreds of dollars on you chickadees. I've seen so much. Been lied to; misled, cheated on; etc. Arggggghhh.
The other stuff section
I am a very happy person most all the time. Been without anyone at all for more than a year and a half. This is new for me. Always had someone in my life. Weird.
My job's really awesome my kids make me so proud and incredibly happy.
Not really sure i want to mess it up.
So i guess what I ask of you (if you care...careful there, girl cuz this is a test to see if you know you) is i ask you to be sure you're not one of those intense people who think i need fixing. Or who think "debating" is fun. It's not to me. Wait. Don't get me wrong. I lllove llloooove laughing. A LOT. And I'm super funny. I promise I'll make you crack up. You might even need to have a spare pair of undies, just in case...
I'm pretty chill mostly. I just want life to be fun and cool. If that means i continue with my life the way it is now, that wouldn't necessarily suck.
But, I am on this site looking. So I guess I'm open to giving it a shot again. Maybe anyway.
If you caught your ex in an affair and it hurt you a lot, then we have that in common.
If your ex thinks he was perfect, has perfect parents and that all problems are "you" we have that in common as well. But, that's no fun. If all that was recently, log off and take some time to learn about your own flaws. I did that and I think I'm a better person now :).
EVERY guy on here claims to be honest, a great Dad, blah, blah, blah. Well if so, why are they single?
So, maybe we can make each other remember that you don't have to be single to be happy.