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openandactive

32 M Oakland, CA

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 9:02pm
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
Height
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Athletic
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Sign
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Other
Income
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Pets
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
Back east for the end of July
6/7 update:
Id say Im definitely a passionate person. I let myself feel strongly for the things that I decide matter in my life. Generally that involves political work and the people around me. Emotions fuel my life but I try and do a good job of having the emotional intelligence to communicate. Been thinking a lot about emotional intelligence lately. I dont think I want to be involved with anyone who doesn't have a good understanding of what they feel and where those feelings are coming from.

Im either a good balance of a few things or to some people maybe a contradiction. Im an anarchist who is very interested in structure and process. That said my anarchism is more rooted in how people treat each other than the latest ground-breaking "academic analysis". I dedicate myself to political change and take many things very seriously, but I love and need lots of laughter and goofiness from people I date. I like to laugh at the world so the horrible parts dont kill me.
I pass as hetero but love people all over the gender spectrum. I appear very masculine but am often too sensitive for my own good...and certainly into a variety of roles in bed. Im not a jock but play a lot of sports. I look like a hippie but have been playing in a punk band. In short I feel like Ive got a good grasp on what makes me happy and who I am...even if that doesn't fit neatly into scenes or labels.

Ive been enjoying the grey area of intimacy and friendship while still trying to be responsible to everyone involved. I find the best way to do that is to be very direct in my communication style. Im not good at hints so generally I just ask :)

Poly and open relationships seem to work best for me. I really enjoy discussing relationship models, sex, gender, the dynamics involved in poly or open relationships, etc so if you're curious please ask and I'll gladly dork out on it for a while.
What I’m doing with my life
For work I clean windows.. hang off fire escapes and ropes. Its a nice view but kind of a head trip to work on the craziest mansions in SF.

Staying physically active- super important to my sanity. I find playing drums and soccer are good things to help my brain. I play drums in an old school punk band (old school referring to a time before it was dominated by macho amoeba)

Ive been seeing someone once or twice a week who's really rad. This means consistent hangouts will be limited to folks I really get on well with, but always time for fun flings too. Also, my poly style tends to have lots of open communication so ideally, if you're someone Im going to see consistently youre comfortable talking about other partners. I actually find it quite sexy sometimes :)

Right now Im trying to be a little less safe in my life. Get on the road for some adventures and be a bit more reckless in general (I think its possible to be reckless in life while responsible to other people). Ive been clearing my schedule of older political projects and opening up space for new adventures which is exciting. This has included some great backpacking trips lately and some visits to psychoactive mindsets I hadn't visited in a while :)
I’m really good at
Eating, laughing, drinking whiskey, sports on the ground (NOT the ones with skates or wheels or in water...its just embarrassing really), drums, over-thinking things, finding random badass old soul and funk music, laughing at myself, listening to people, communicating, balancing taking my time in life and getting lots done...also pretty good at smelling things- random yes but smells are a good thing to take notice of.
The first things people usually notice about me
Well the hair is pretty noticeable from a distance...then Id say either the eyes or the missing tooth (ha! now teeth)...maybe the old man hands...thats a lot to notice. I obviously have no idea.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books- UPDATE- so Im slowly hopping on the political sci-fi wagon....but in general Ive had a hard time getting through books in my life but enjoying some reading lately. Readin Mexico Unconquered right now...I just read George Orwell's Homage to Catalonia right now which is amazing. I also finished a book by David Gilbert, from the Weather Underground, which was really inspiring. Currently Im reading writings from a Black Nationalist and Anarchist named Kuwasi Balagoon who was in the Panthers, the BLA, had a trans partner, was openly bi, and escaped federal prison twice! One of the most interesting revolutionaries youve never heard of.

Shows- Dont have a tv and havent for a long time. I look up a few shows online: Daily Show, Colbert Report, Adult Swim and regular soccer highlights are about it.

Music- Good music in all genres but what Ive been into lately is John Prine, 70s Soul, Bad Brains, P Funk, T Rex, The Clash, John Hartford, The Coup, Tool, Iggy and the Stooges, Morphine- one of if not my favorite all time band...lately been into Bruce Springsteen's Nebraska album...Always exploring old school punk and funky soul.
The six things I could never do without
-athletic activity
-music- If certain songs come on, Im probably going to have to stop the conversation for a minute.
-GOOD WHISKEY!...or ice cream...or bourbon ice cream! I win!
-sunshine...and sunscreen! (I am a redhead)- As a redhead the screen is a must since I love the sun.
-sex
-Sleep- oh my god I miss sleeping in so much right now!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
In general- too many things. I am definitely an overthinker. Im not satisfied with going about the day to day- I need some meaning...meaning to what I spend my time doing, who I spend my time with, and a greater understanding of what the hell is going on in this world.

I think about how to fight the conditioning bombarded on me every day as a white male in this society...and how to help other people raised similarly to me fight similar battles. If youre interested in dating please have done some work on developing at least basic race, class, and gender analysis.

I also think a lot about gender roles and how that relates to day to day interactions. Ive been thinking a lot about labels, queer, hetero, the assumptions that come with them...how to fight to not have any labels...and how even the ability to not have a label is a privilege in itself.

Lately, Ive spent a lot of time thinking how happy I am getting older. I love where Im at and having fun getting older.

And ya I also think about sex a lot.
On a typical Friday night I am
Hanging out with friends, having a good beer, engaging in raucous debate or trying to get out of town to go camping somewhere!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I thought the viper security system was an electronic toy snake hidden in a car until recently.
I’m looking for
  • Guys and girls who like bi guys
  • Ages 21–40
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
You should message me if
Right now Im really open to multiple options, BUT I dont (usually) sleep with people I cant have a decent conversation with:
a) Someone (or multiple people) who is open minded and a bit kinky to have some great sex with
b) Somebody who is interesting in building a solid friendship that may or may not involve sexy time.
c) If you are someone interested in a more committed relationship I am also interested in pursuing that but please share some similar outlooks on poly/open relationship ideas. And please appreciate a healthy balance between sharing some of our lives and maintaining our individual lives/activities
-If you think Bisexual as a term is way too limiting because it implies a gender binary
-Im very attracted to androgyny so people not identifying within a gender binary are very encouraged to message me
- If Youre a lean or fit mlae identified person who is into some vers fun in bed (so I like guys' toned stomachs)
-If youve noticed that Ive looked at your profile and you think we'd get along but I haven't messaged you- say hello!
I really need to go on some road trips so if you need a travel buddy for a quick adventure let me know.