I'm new to Montreal and I'd love to make friends. Dating isn't off the table, but I'd like if you were up-front about what you are looking for before meeting in real life, even if your answer is that you want to wait and see. I just really want to avoid that awkward situation where I think we're just hanging out casually and you think it's a date, then there's an attempted kiss and I end up flailing wildly in confusion... can you tell this has happened to me before?
Ideally I'd like to talk for about a month online before meeting up in real life, but I am willing to compromise on that front. I just need time to get settled in this area and all!
I really love Myers-Briggs typology as a dating tool, though I totally recognize that there are some problems with it's psychological validity. I test as INTJ or ENTJ and I'm not sure why there's such a fluctuation. I'm a mix of both. I'd say INTJ in terms of deeper interpersonal stuff, and ENTJ in the sense that I love taking the lead of things and can be a bit of a verbal steamroller!
Now, you may have noticed I dress a little differently. I'm part of the lolita subculture, which is a Japanese street fashion. It has nothing to do with ageplay or the Nabokov novel, though I don't look down on those things. My substyle of choice is sweet lolita with a bit of a hime flair. If you want to learn more, I am very good at explaining the aesthetic and have presented panels for beginners at small conventions. I fall under the catagory of lifestyle lolita, which means that I try to incorporate the fashion into my life. I love tea, classic novels, sweet foods, bakeries, and I take the style very seriously. On a related note, manners are very important to me, though I try to be flexible. I will openly talk about sexuality and bodily functions, religion and politics, because I'm not repressed, but I really dislike excessive swearing, gross chewing, and things like that.
I'm on the autism spectrum, basically what most think of as Asperger's, but apparently that term isn't often used anymore. Unqualified people are constantly questioning my diagnosis because most don't understand that autism is a spectrum, and that we are not all extremely low-functioning. I stim, I infodump, I hyperfocus, I obsess. I have some problems in my daily life, but I mostly just enjoy the way my social habits let me look at society from an outside view. It lets me question some aspects of society that most people just accept as the norm. Anyone wanting to meet with me needs to be willing to understand that I can't be held to neurotypical standards. I exceed in many areas that neurotypicals don't, but I also have challenges with some things.
I really love and respect people who have an interesting style of dress, or belong to obscure subcultures. My standards of beauty aren't so much about what you were born with as it is about what you do with it. I'd much rather date a fat rockabilly girl than a conventionally attractive person who may be well-dressed but in a way that doesn't seem inspired.
Speaking of subcultures, I am part of the furry fandom. No, it's not a kink. The fandom is actually quite innocent, though it does have a dark side, but that side is fairly easy to avoid. It's like how Star Trek isn't a fetish but some people in the Trekkie fandom may write slash fic. That shouldn't reflect on the fandom as a whole. My fursona is a siamese cat.
I have a very active imagination. I love RPGs, especially pen-and-paper. Pathfinder is my game of choice. I'd really love meeting people who want to get a group going, experienced or not! I'd really like to live my life as much into my concept of a fantasy princess as I can, though this might mean something different to me than it does to most. Don't worry though, I'm perfectly stable. Aside from autism-related things I'm much more mentally stable than the average person.
Please don't be shy to message, I'd love to talk.