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35 M Palo Alto, CA

My Details

Last Online
Apr 17
6′ 1″ (1.85m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Atheism, and laughing about it
Graduated from Ph.D program
Science / Engineering
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Okay)

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My self-summary
65% water, 20% protein, 15% stardust; please excuse my dust.

Like a good action movie, I don't take myself too seriously. Like a good drama, I take myself just seriously enough.

35% creator, 20% destroyer, 45% protector, 20% overachiever, 7% to make it a prime. If we ever meet, I'll tell why protector has that high of a percent.

I know street Spanish; which is why I only list knowing it "okay". I learned it growing up in Mexico, on the... street. So there are huge gaps in my vocabulary, but I can cuss well enough to make myself blush. I have a long term project of reading Don Quixote in Spanish. I've read a translation, in Spain (seemed apropos), but reading it in the original language has been slow going.

An ex lover and dear friend has what she calls the Calculus Rule: don't sleep with anyone that doesn't know Calculus. I don't adhere to this rule... but I can see its logic.

Nothing lives up to our ideals. That is quite literally what ideals are for. If things are living up to your ideals, that's awesome... but you need some new ideals. One of my relationship ideals is to be open, honest, and vulnerable with my partner to the level that we can discuss and work on better matching each other's ideals. Only then can we know what really matters. Only then can we can work on moving the real and the ideal closer together.

Of course the above gets into the whole concept of "settling", a taboo word in our culture that highly romanticizes love and relationships to an almost pathological level. It is easier to sell us stuff if we are always chasing that dream. I have friends that don't believe in love. I do believe in love, I just don't trust it. That is to say, I think that you need more than idealized romantic love to make a real relationship. It is necessary but not sufficient. Long nights of love making and deep philosophical talk are wonderful but someone's got to take out the trash and it's a long drive way.
What I’m doing with my life
Building systems that enable people (myself included) to do science at a local medical school. Luckily for me, these are the days of miracle and wonder where that is an important and critical part of science.

Between doing that, I build food (i.e. cook) that enables people (myself included) to enjoy life because yum. I also run (poorly), read (well), and not learn how to play my guitar (expert level).

Planning a pastry crawl in SF.
I’m really good at
Knowing the right way write a tilde in LaTeX. This secret knowledge was entrusted to me by a secret order of---f**k 'em, it's \~{}. Tell your friends. The world deserves to know.


Other things...
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay... fill me out!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
To be honest, on other people's profiles, I read this section last or not at all. I really don't care if you've read/listened to/liked the same books/music/shows that I have. If we totally agree that, for example, Fight Club is the best OWS themed film, even though it predates OWS, then what will we argue/talk about? How will we grown and, just maybe, find out I'm wrong? If I wanted to date my mirror image, I'd buy some gin and tonic and lube and stop wasting both our times. Ha, just kidding, I already have those things.

But really, this section is about giving you, dear reader, some hooks to mention or try to connect with in a message. And honestly, if you have to look at my top ten list of movies, books, yawn, etc. to find me cool and/or interesting then you should probably move on to the next hundred guys who messaged you. :)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How to build and engineer community and connection.

Finding joy in traffic. If I can find it there, I can find it anywhere. I also try to be thankful and it's pretty easy to be thankful in traffic... thankful that I bike to work and don't have to deal with traffic more than a couple of times a week.

That moment of fear after you dump the sugar packet into your coffee/tea. "Was that sugar or did I grab a salt packet by mistake?"

Why are we so afraid to admit that everything we do matters? That guy you cut off in traffic and pissed off because you misjudged velocities? He's going to go home and be nasty to his wife who will in tern take it out on their children. The women you let go ahead of you in the checkout line---because she only has a bottle of wine---will be in a better mood because she wasn't late to her party where she meets and charms the love of her life. Those stories are not true... but they could be. Everything we do has an effect. Even the simplest, unthinking acts, when integrated over our short lifetime, have an enormous effect. It's a terrifying thought. It means that we are always "on". On the other hand, it means that even the little acts of kindness and good have an effect. Fuck random acts of kindness; practice deterministic acts of kindness. Don't speak truth to power; speak truth to everyone. Everything we do matters!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm a top. That's a label for a lot of things. Some of them fit. Many of them do not. That's language for ya.

I've been reading about Tantric sex. Someone posted this link and I've been reading though it, nothing mind opening but still interesting. I don't remember who on here posted the link but if you're reading, thank you. :)

I'm straight right up until the moment when Benedict Cumberbatch does a reading of Jabberwocky. It was a close call with Kubla Khan.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 28–40
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
If you can't answer that question, then why are you wasting your time looking at this profile? There's like a billion other ones out there. I don't want to hold the hand of someone who needs me to hold their hand. I don't want to command someone who needs me to command them.