penisjr
31 Madison, WI
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penisjr
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My self-summary
I am part Wednesday Addams, part Daria, part Darlene Connor, part Lisbeth Salander and part Liz Lemon. I also really identify with Fiona Gallagher from Shameless. The American version, because I hate that British stuff. It doesn't make me dance naked on a hospital bed.

I've been banned from nearly every form of social media at least once. Don't ask me if I have Snapchat.

I call Madison, Wisconsin home, but if I'm showing up in your city, it's likely because I'm traveling and there for a day or two. And I probably have a reason for being there.

I'm full of funny stories and random facts. I have a dry/dark/sarcastic/black sense of humor. I laugh at things that are inappropriate. My friends have told me I remind them of Juno or Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I'm not a manic pixie dream girl.

IG: DominoTheGardenHo
Twitter: SilkenFloss
Snapchat: HomadeCoffee

Random stuff about me:

I've been a big baseball fan since the Deion Sanders era. I was raised a Cubs fan, but I converted to a Milwaukee Brewers fan... Because I live in Wisconsin and the Cubs are lame. Right field bleachers FTW!

I shop at secondhand stores for just about everything because I'm cheap and I like treasure hunting. I very rarely buy things new.

I (infrequently) play video games (preferably first person shooters, in groups) and I used to play D&D. I don't play often because my gaming friends have dispersed.

I watch tons of movies. Four Star is the best thing ever, but now I stream/download most of my movies. I love to ski (usually at Cascade) and I am accident prone. I love to cook and bake. I'm very spontaneous. I work out a few times a week at Princeton Club, and keeping myself in the best physical shape is very important to me. I generally stick to a high protein diet.

I love to read. I compulsively collect music via Soulseek. I travel whenever I can. I love New Orleans. I'm obsessed with classic jazz and ragtime music.

Former travels: Costa Rica, New Orleans, Iceland, Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Hawaii, The Bahamas, Mexico, and tons of American cities and states.
What I’m doing with my life
Making Homade Homatoes.

I also help Big Cricket Farms, a startup based out of Youngstown, Ohio. We raise crickets as a protein source for human consumption.

I do this all while professionally trolling Mark Cuban.
I’m really good at
Changing really fast (without taking my shoes off), brand building, walking in eight inch stilettos, telling douchebags to fuck off, rapping, and remembering lyrics.

Also, analyzing and relating to people, making coffee, cooking/baking, making people laugh, making fun of people without them realizing it..
The first things people usually notice about me
"You're way shorter than I thought you'd be."

And I hate it when dudes tell me I should smile or ask why I'm not smiling. Don't be one of them, please. Or when people tell me to show teeth. That's just not my natural way of smiling. Whenever I smile for no apparent reason, everyone around me thinks they're going to be attacked in some way within a matter of seconds.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Millenium Trilogy, East of Eden, White Oleander, The Catcher in the Rye, Choke, House of the Spirits, The Collector, The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Lolita, Naked, Devil in the White City, The Last Madam, Sin in the Second City

Movies: American Psycho, A Love Song for Bobby Long, The Big Lebowski, Ghost World, Goodfellas, Kill Bill, Boondock Saints, Amelie, Django Unchained, Dirty Work, Nymphomaniac, Interstellar

TV: Arrested Development, Boardwalk Empire, Orange is the New Black, Sopranos, Game of Thrones, Treme, 30 Rock, House of Cards, 2 Broke Girls, Homeland, Fargo, Orphan Black, Rita, Masters of Sex

Basically, anything directed by Woody Allen, Mary Harron, Martin Scorcese, Spike Lee, David Fincher, Sam Mendes, and Tarantino. Also, Leo, Daniel Day-Lewis, Edward Norton, Scarlett Johansson, Christoph Waltz, sad bastard John Cusack movies, Robert DeNiro and Christian Bale are amazing.

Food: French & Indian cooking and home cooked meals, in general. I love trying new restaurants. I'm always up for something I haven't tried before. I love Vietnamese, too. Icelandic food was shockingly delicious.
The six things I could never do without
1. Other humans, particularly my friends and family.
2. My kinks
3. Music
4. Electrolyte-infused water
5. Internets
6. Generic utility item
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Growing food and why people are so stupid and what made them that way.
On a typical Friday night I am
More than likely, I'm nerding out at home.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have a key to the city of Pasadena and I know all the words to the theme song of Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego.

I have Postural Orthostatic Tachychardia Syndrome (POTS) and Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS) type III.

I have stairs in my house.

My profile is booby trapped with certain lines that help me weed people out. Make generic, lame comments via a first message at your own risk.
You should message me if
You are an academian, entrepreneur, artist, or some other sort of driven spirit.

You don't have a Madonna/whore complex.

You wanna go somewhere awesome and probably almost die.
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