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31 F Sunnyvale, CA

My Details

Last Online
Apr 18
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
A little extra
Strictly other
Aries, and it’s fun to think about
Working on med school
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), German (Poorly), Spanish (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
If you are polyamorous or non-monogamous, be sure to read "You Should Message Me If" for some thoughts on the matter and what it means to me. I identify myself as just non-monogamous, but I'll use the term poly since that is more familiar to most people.

If you're not poly or you are unfamiliar with poly, please, don't let the fact that I have a boyfriend make you feel weird; we don't come as a "packaged deal," I find the idea of "friendly coercion" absolutely abhorrent, and I'm not looking for anything specific beyond, "Hey, this lady sounds cool! I'll get that bitch some coffee, bitches love coffee!", seriously. I love coffee. I've pretty much replaced my blood with coffee at this point. Coffee.

I'm not really here for dating or seeking partners. I warm up to people slowly and I don't like getting hit on. I don't get out for socializing much because school and work dominates my time, so this is a way for me to put myself out there to connect with people whom I'd otherwise be missing.

I'm one of those gamer nerds — paper and dice more than video. I attend a few Bay Area conventions throughout the year, though it's mostly for the LARPing, since I don't get to do it very often outside of con. I'm not hardcore about it, but I'm a fan of escapism and I really enjoy it.

I love animals. My family and I ran a cat rescue out of my house for most of my teen years, fueled almost entirely by neighborhood kittens who'd wind up on our doorstep. I've become pretty skilled at pet adoptions over the years. I have cats and rabbits.

I would describe myself as more of an alpha personality type who practices secure attachment. The only person I'm interested in controlling is myself. I'm more about mutual respect and affection than domination or power plays. Seeing my loved ones happy gives me a real feeling of joy. I dislike it when someone confuses my altruism and affection as a sign of submissiveness. Doms who go around posturing and demonstrating how mighty and in control they are make me want to poke at their vulnerable, squishy insides with a stick.

Being genuine and self-accountable is important to me, in myself and in other people. Admitting to the things you don't know is just as attractive as sharing what you do know.

I want people to be straight with me. Speak the truth — tactfully — even when it's unkind, or inconvenient, or you may be hated for it. If someone stands to get hurt from keeping quiet for the sake of harmony, then the harmony isn't worth it.

I'm a book lover and will read just about anything. My favorite scientific topics are psychology and I've recently sparked an interest in human genetics. I like Norse and Celtic history and folklore, and I love fictional novels that involve gritty, modern-day high fantasy, survival horror, and a good brain-twister or mystery.

I am obsessed with red everything. If left to my own devices, my house would look like it was bleeding, and it would make me all warm and fuzzy, like my insides were lined with kittens. My other favorite colors are black and neon everything.

I'm into personality theory. I like MBTI and numerology (I'm INFJ, enneagram 6w5 [tritype 638] sp/sx, life path 8, Aries, year of the pig, Slytherin. Yo.) and all that silly stuff that makes most people roll their eyes. I don't like them because I believe IN them, I like them because they're different sorts of tools that facilitate examination of a person's personality and behaviors. You take bits here, turn them all over and pick them apart, throw out the bits you don't like and mold them into who and what you are — not because you want to change these systems to force them into reflecting you, but because the process of studying these systems forces you to look at a person's sense of self in a different way and from there leads you to a stronger understanding of yourself and those around you.

I like people who are curious and follow through on that curiosity. Some of my favorite times have come from friends and me coming across a thing we didn't know anything about and huddling around the computer as we look it up.

I really love to learn. Tell me all of the random crap you know. I'll make my whole damn day.

Ex-Mormon, here. I was born into it and started the push to get out at a young age.

I like to throw small get-togethers and act all classy and shit with my friends. Wine, cheese, tiny little sandwiches with cucumber and the crusts cut off — oh yeah.

I don't like floofy girly drinks. If I order something mixed, it's usually a long island iced tea. Otherwise, I'm a classics kind of girl: scotch, brandy, etc.

...and coffee. Always. Coffee.
What I’m doing with my life
I am going to school to become a medical assistant. Lately, that has taken up the majority of my time, but I try to maintain a life for myself and stay flexible. All school and no play makes Blondie's brain leak out of her nose.

I've committed myself to losing weight and I have lost 30 pounds so far. Go me! I'm still chugging along and every time I step off the scale I do a happy dance. It's caused some clothing complications as I shrink out of my wardrobe, but friends have been kind enough to lend me some things while I'm in this awkward transitional phase.

What I'm not doing, but would like to do, is volunteer at a wildlife animal shelter. There's one near where I grew up in East San Jose that I've always wanted to get involved in, but I never seemed to have the time. I'm hoping that after school, this will change.

I would also like to become more involved my local kink community: attending munches and discussion groups and workshops, specifically. I'm more about the people than I am about the clubs and the parties.
I’m really good at
Being crude and handsy and inappropriate and getting people to love me for it.

I'm good at baking. I prefer it to cooking. Every so often I'll go all Mad Scientist in my kitchen and invent or tweak a recipe. The casualties are devastating: Flour smudges! Piles of mixing bowls! Egg shell fragments! Containers of yeasty, frothing monstrosity! Muah hah hah!

I can't eat any of it because I have Celiac Disease and live strictly gluten-free (which is fine, because I never eat the stuff I make anyway), but my friends are always there to support/enable my baking problem. One day, they will all be fat as blimps, and it will be all my fault.

I'm also good at making my presence known, I suppose. People tend to remember me.
The first things people usually notice about me
Resting bitchface.
Hands flapping around all over the place.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I'm not going to bother listing off my musical favorites. There would be too much. As long as it's not rap, gospel, country or mariachi, I'll enjoy it.

Favorite books are House of Leaves, Snow Crash, Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell, and the Dresden Files series. I can talk about any of those for hours.

I play tabletop RPGs. I'm all right with D20 in general, but my favorite system is White Wolf. I particularly enjoy Changeling (both of them) and Aberrant. I'm working on getting the hang of the Fudge system so I can run a Dresden Files RPG.

For video games, I like RPGs and first-person shooters. Dragon Age and Mass Effect are my top RPGs, while Bioshock and Halo are my go-to FPS. Portal is my favorite puzzle game.

Thai and Indian are my favorites for spice, and I love sushi. I grew up in East San Jose, so Mexican is my comfort food. I get made-by-a-grandma-with-love tamales from a neighbor every Christmas and it's heaven.

Adventure Time and Sailor Moon are my guilty pleasures.

I watch Labyrinth regularly and can quote the script throughout the movie without error.
The six things I could never do without
Girly giggles.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Random stuff. Have you ever read the Sandman comics? Remember Delirium's realm? Yep, that's my brain.
On a typical Friday night I am
Pondering who would win in an Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny between Cthulhu and The Flying Spaghetti Monster.

On a typical Saturday night, however, I try to make it to karaoke in an awesome dive bar.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
This is like a total cop-out job interview question. What's your biggest flaw? I'm too perfect. Where do you see yourself in five years? In your pants, dur hur.

What's the most private thing I'm willing to admit? I am so not private. Prep your TMI shield before you ask me a question, I'll probably answer it with more frankness than you were expecting.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like girls
  • Ages 20–40
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Some information put down here to not bog down the rest of the profile:

Polyamory is not just swinging with a friendly label. It means seeing your partner happy with another person and being happy that they are happy. It means security, trust, and respect.

If you are poly, I am only willing to interact with you if you are comfortable and happy with your own ground rules — even if we're just friends hanging out for coffee. A poly relationship without rules that are respected by all partners involved is a breeding ground for insecurity and miscommunication and the situation eventually turns into a pressure-cooker. I do not want to get dragged into that situation.

If you tell me, "I am poly but my partner is not," I won't get involved with you in any respect. I have heard arguments that this situation can work, but I am of the opinion that it cannot, and that it takes advantage of the monogamous person who is compromising too much for the sake of the person they love. It's astonishing what a person will pretend to be fine with for fear of losing their partner, and it's disgusting what a person will put their loved ones through because their want of something takes precedence over their partner's feelings. Those are harsh words, but I have strong feelings on the matter.

Secondary ≠ Non-Entity. I don't like that term. It has a diminishing quality to it, a feeling of being lesser than and beneath, a feeling of impermanence and lacking importance. I understand why some people use it, to define and keep track of their relationships, but the words we use to label a person have a way of insinuating their way into our subconscious and they affect the way we perceive and treat people. I'd rather negate the issue entirely and use more general terms like girlfriend or lover or partner, or even mistress or concubine or paramour. There are so many words in the English language to choose from, so why do we choose a word that is so cold and impersonal? Turning an individual into a number or a bullet-indent is demeaning.