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49 New York, NY Woman


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 35–62
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating

My details

Last online
Mar 25
5′ 2″ (1.57m)
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Cancer, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Art / Music / Writing
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
NOTE: I'm off the dating market--met my love on Okcupid!
But there are other reasons to get in touch: if you need an editor or want to join a poetry group or want intellectual hiking/skiing friends.

People sometimes ask me if I'm a dancer (though I'm not rail thin, nor do I have a bun), because I'm muscular. My voice is girlish and I ask a lot of questions. Strangers talk to me and the families of my exes send me Facebook messages. I am playful, curious, sometimes restless and always looking for companions for an adventure, generally outdoors.

I am also bookish. Copies of the New York Review of Books and The New Yorker get stacked up around my house.

Solely interested in monogamous relationships, but I'd be very happy to make friends/activity buddies for outdoor activities, right now kayakking (fall) and xcountry skiing when the snow comes. If you're a super athlete I won't be fast enough for you, but I will go....
I also love swing and waltzing. Please write me if you too are happiest doing any of these.

If you're my lover, I want us to be really good friends and fall in and out of love over and over.

A friend wrote this about me:

"Every time I'm with you, I feel more alive; my world opens up with new possibilities. You like to laugh and it's contagious. You're up for almost anything. You are non-judgmental, courageous, intuitive, supportive, very kind, very intelligent, capable of self-reflection and unafraid to change. Also, you have a way of being outspoken without being inappropriate and insensitive. It's rare that you find all those characteristics in a single person."

She is a sweet friend and persuasive when she wants to be.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Journalist and editor, Ivy grad, currently ghostwriting a memoir for a doctor. My computer contains a couple of unpublished novels and I have gotten as far as having an agent. Ten years ago I began a poetry group, which is still going strong. I stay close to my Dad who is in love again at 85. I like good TV and movies, not necessarily artsy. I am always looking for ways to be outdoors. I love cello music and rich voices.

My longest relationship lasted ten years and we were extraordinarily close until he died. Since then, serial monogamy. My friends go back to junior high. Although I have no children, I would be happy if you do, and have a fantasy of being a stepgrandma. I have mentored teenagers and loved it.

I sometimes go to a funky shul and have many devout friends but I am an atheist. Religion can be good psychology.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
storytelling cooking interpreting poetry gourmet food for limited diets, conversation, seeing both sides, asking questions, metaphors, massage, decorating, dancing charming strangers.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I get told fairly often that I come off as a "hippie" or "kibbutznic" because I'm friendly. Men like my butt. Hopefully, that's not the first thing they notice.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Suite Francais, Mrs. Dalloway, Felicia's Journey, Le Divorce, Huckleberry Finn, Lolita...Kay Ryan's poetry

History of Ideas

Indian and Asian fusion food, sushi, steak

Big Love, Breaking Bad, Orange is the New Black

Being John Malkovich,The Night of the Hunter, Rashomon, Babe

Sam Cooke, Otis Redding, Paul Simon, Cole Porter, Bonnie Rait, Bob Marley, "Crying," Beethoven, Rufus Wainwright (lucky Rufus next to Beethoven)
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I hate having to eat only one cuisine for more than a few weeks

water, as in sailing, swimming, walking alongside it, lying on a beach listening to it, carrying it around in a bottle or cup

colors I like green especially (these little green boxes with the crayon in them on this site are sweet)

work of some kind (could possibly be just chores)

people who listen

people to love
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
what I'm reading, what's going well, how to live happily and well, how my friends are doing.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
seeing a friend
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I once wrote a love letter to William James. He is the mentor in my head, both on philosophy and psychology. Please write me if that means something to you.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
see above.
Any/OR... (these are not requirements) Also, though this list may seem long, all of this is true of me.

You are a rationalist. You understand that the world is glorious and unfair and tragic. You do not say "everything happens for a reason" or subscribe to the Law of Attraction.

You like to waltz or other kinds of dance (or would learn).

You want to do new things together--even after the first six months.

You like outdoor activities: xcountry in winter, beach in summer.

You are financially responsible and ethical.

You do not talk more than you listen or fail to notice that your listener is restless.

You can apologize if need be, and don't need to be "right."

You can make requests and state complaints in a useful way.

You have time for another person.

You are open to love and are not looking for perfection, just someone you'd like to grow with.

*******************below is no longer traits true of me

If you are or have been an academic

if you've adopted a child from another country....

you live in a beautiful place, including suburbs and country towns

Note to lesbians who have been burned by bisexuals: I don't cheat and I wouldn't leave any reasonably happy relationship because I thought I'd met someone male/better. I don't think that way.

Note to men: I've noticed that men I've spent time with have had older sisters they loved and admired and/ or single mothers. On my end, I have an older brother and my parents were happily married for fifty years. I weed out kid-in-candy-store men fast. I am not ambivalent about solid masculinity; it's great.