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25 Somerville, MA Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–99
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Aquarius, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
English (Fluently), Latin (Okay)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Surrealist speech generator released in 1989.
May or may not be a shaman.
Extraordinarily anti-bullshit. (Username is relevant.)

This profile is guaranteed. If it's not amusing enough, you are entitled to a time refund. Please write to The Providers of the Hourglass, ∞ Existence Boulevard, Vast Multiverse.

Contains 72% less rambling. Ask me for details on what's below.

Cognizant of rebellion often being just another type of mainstream.
I vaguely ignore both.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Wanting to dress in powdered wigs/full 17th or 18th century regalia, followed by cruising around and blasting classical music.

Tutoring, considering what's next. Thinking about unconventional sources of income.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Mentally attributing sound effects to many events.
Attempting to use anything and everything as a resource.

Pirating technical manuals because the rest of the world is bad at going into detail on things I'm fascinated by.

Accidentally making fireworks.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Moving way too fast or unpredictably for my surroundings.

Often hard to faze (unless I'm made to laugh, which I certainly appreciate) while also not shying away from most topics of conversation.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
There's no need to share these. Respect for other favorites is most important.

♫ Reggae, jazz, techno/electronic/stuff without lyrics.

~ Pasta, pizza, chocolate. Pulled pork sandwiches, cheese-steaks, soft pretzels.

αßΓ Stuart Little, The Phantom Tollbooth, nonfiction, etc.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Love, freedom, amusement, knowledge and wisdom, prudence with money/resources, and a nice scarf & warm overcoat.

Not real:
A bullet that fires guns, a picture of myself from 10 years before I was born, The Deceitful Tea Party from Beyond Reality, and discount vulgar frog™ toothpaste.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
What the world would be like with more corrupted politicians, in the sense of 'software error' instead of 'self-serving and greedy'.

Does it defeat the point of smooth jazz to make it play faster than normal speed? If a rooftop restaurant owner is under pressure to serve good food, could you say the steaks are high?

"God is a barn of blazing horses", a line in a poetry book I found on someone's front steps.

Wisdom found in strange or accidental places. The belief that humor is everywhere, that everything is amusing - but between everyone and no one is laughing at any given thing at any time.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Chasing Keanu Reeves.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Sometimes still confuse Philadelphia and Pennsylvania, for what I think is an acceptable reason.

It would be great if I could do a better Nigel Thornberry impression.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I am likely messaging for friendship without guaranteed, if any, notions of dating. It's too early to tell.

Age doesn't matter for friends. For anything resembling romance, closer to my own age.