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35 Los Angeles, CA Genderqueer, Androgynous, Genderfluid, Non-binary

Genderqueer, Androgynous, Genderfluid, Non-binary

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 25–41
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Dec 16
Queer, Pansexual, Bisexual
5′ 4″ (1.63m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Other, and laughing about it
Libra, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from masters program
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes cats
English, Yiddish (Poorly), Spanish (Poorly), French (Poorly), Hebrew (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I have a newer profile: lepidoptera47. I'll probably retire this one sometime soon.

I'm a teacher, a writer, an artist, a community-builder, a gardener. I'm an introvert, but I value my friendships and relationships highly. I have strong opinions about a lot of things and I'm also a good listener. I genuinely enjoy learning from others who are different from me and I also really value spending time with people who have a compatible worldview. I like spending time with a close friend drinking tea or cooking or walking together. I believe the world can be more peaceful and fair than it is, and I believe in working together with others to make that happen, while being kind to ourselves in that process. I can have a pretty acerbic sense of humor when I want to, and I like using words like "acerbic." I am attracted to people of all genders; gender-fluid and genderqueer are the words that I've found come closest to describing my own gender identity. I bump into things a lot.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Over the past year I've been engaged in a pretty intense process of re-evaluating everything from the way I express my gender to the way I communicate with the students I teach, my friends and my family, to the kind of transportation I use, and yes, who I date. Basically, I've started moving more and more towards doing things the way I'd actually like to do them, which has meant giving up a certain amount of comfort and predictability in my life. As a result I've found myself both more vulnerable and more confident; I find that I speak more clearly and have closer friendships. My closest friends have started feeling more and more like family.

I have been living in an intentional community and experiencing all of the joy, conflict, support and challenge that entails. I went car-free a year ago and get around by bike and metro; I have found that it has helped me to slow down. I have taught music to young children for the past decade and am taking a sabbatical to complete an oral history project I have been working on very slowly for nearly as long. I have played violin and bandleader in a folk band for the past 5 years and recently stepped down from that, as well.

After my sabbatical year, I am not certain what will come next; I imagine it might involve community, listening to peoples' stories, children, art and writing, in one form or another.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
seeing more than one side to any situation, writing, drawing portraits, losing things in the stacks of papers on my desk, finding said things (usually), deciphering bus maps, making guacamole, coming up with crazy ideas that other people make into reality, and finding holes in peoples' arguments for capitalism.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Someone once told me I'm capable of being socially awkward and charismatic at the same time. I'm quiet and soft-spoken, but I have no poker face and I often get comments about my big smile or a "cheer up, it'll be ok", depending what emotion I happen to be wearing at the time. Sometimes people say I "look like a vegetarian," whatever that means, although I am not one anymore.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Honestly, my eyes glaze over when I get to this part of other peoples' profiles.... but ever since I started riding public transit I've been reading a lot. Some of the best books I've been reading recently (haven't necessarily finished all of them):

Sacred Pleasure: Sex, Myth and the Politics of the Body (Riane Eisler)
True Love: A Practice for Awakening the Heart (Thich Nhat Hanh)
How to Talk so Kids will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk (Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish)
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking (Susan Cain)
No More Throw-Away People: The Co-Production Imperative (Edgar Cahn)
Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women's Love and Desire (Lisa Diamond)
and off-and-on I've been working on Sacred Economics by Charles Eisenstein.
and I love children's books.

I don't really watch movies. I like going to Outfest and other independent film festivals sometimes.

Music: I play klezmer music so there is a special place in my heart for anything Balkan/Eastern European/"gypsy"/Roma etc. Anything with live string musicians. James Taylor and Joni Mitchell are my comfort food. I secretly love Christian bluegrass/country music.

Food: almost anything, especially if it is fresh and you cook it for me. :)
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
family, friends, avocados, paints in vivid colors, a notebook, a sense of curiosity
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
economic injustice, lesson plans to entertain six-year-olds with 5-minute attention spans, the future of human civilization, and how to improve my relationships.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
sampling of recent Friday nights:
catching up with a friend over tea
home doing some good self-care (home-cooked dinner, bubble bath, early to bed)
at a meet-up event
meeting my sister for dinner
(I can actually be convinced to go out for a drink or dancing... by the right person on the right day)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
here on this website? everything i've written above this question, I guess.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you enjoy talking about art, music, identity, culture, community, politics or personal growth (with a sense of humor about it...)

you're relatively self-aware and have a fairly good idea of what you want in life. I'm pretty sure we're all works-in-progress, and, corny as it may sound, it's all about the journey, not the destination: I'm looking for fellow travelers.

you wouldn't mind helping to keep me from bumping into things (I'm getting better but I could still use some help)

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