Less quotable and more honest [taken from a recent email to a friend living far away]:
As for my garden - I seem to be in the grips of some sort of existential crisis which has kept me from doing things that I like/want to do - namely tending to my garden. My lettuce, is not lettuce but long stems of something that does not resemble lettuce in the slightest. My broccoli looks okay, cauliflower fine, strawberries too. The squirrels ate one of my zucchini plants. I hate the squirrels. Sometimes I get really upset and run after them while waving my rake back and forth in the air and yelling at them to go away. I am not wearing slippers while this happens but if you'd like you can imagine me with slippers and a bath robe. This would complete the fucking crazy lady personage that apparently I'm turning into.