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32 M Baltimore, MD

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 22–35
  • Near me
  • For new friends

My Details

Last Online
Sep 11
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Aries, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Entertainment / Media
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Likes cats
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Frederick -> DC -> Brooklyn -> San Francisco -> Baltimore

I've always rather pompously considered myself a student of humanity. Stories matter to me, but not as much as the people attached. I generally find and appreciate the basic humanity in everyone and we generally find a way to relate.

Perhaps a bit stoic as of late but I want to be silly again. It's there -- warm and wonderful - but it takes the right person to bring it out.

House-trained, quick with wit, self-deprecating but largely actualized... secretly self-assured. Remarkable in the right light, quite dastardly in others.

Adventure assured...

I said to an old friend's mother the other day that I want to settle down. She said, "Andy, you will never be boring. You aren't capable of it." I really wish I was. But, there are a lot of ways to skin a cat, well, really any animal (though I think cat mutilation is especially awful) and I am still of the opinion that commitment can lead to even greater adventure, at least with the right kind of of co-conspirator..

But, I mean, this is really a quick con, isn't it? I'm no good at the hard sell, and infinitely more cute/funny/endearing/precious/likable/afable/etc in more intimate environs. So maybe message me and I'll emerge from my shell and/or appear out of the internet, as complex and intriguing as advertised?

I like smart, sassy, intelligent women with open hearts in the face of an equally healthy sense of cynicism. Dedication, thoughtfulness, forgiveness, and love without reserve. Ideals over interests.

I'm done chasing girls, but I'll move heaven and Earth for the right woman.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I was writing and editing culture magazines (it's this thing they used to do before blogs). Still a professional writer but now I'm trying to help out a little more concretely..
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Trading stories. In my old age I've become a beacon for confessors of things both deep and dark. Try me. I'll bet you'll be first to blush.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I've gotten shorter.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
06 y/o: The Lorax, Back to the Future, TMNT, NKOTB, Pizza
11 y/o: Ender's Game, The Princess Bride, My So-Called Life, Green Day, Grilled Cheese
16 y/o: Naked Lunch, Empire Records, Freaks & Geeks, Modest Mouse, Popeye's
21 y/o: The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle, Ghost World, Arrested Development, Modest Mouse, Sushi
26 y/o: House of Leaves, The Royal Tenenbaums, The Office (UK), Acid House Kings, Popcorn
31 y/o: Just Kids, Safety Not Guaranteed, Parks and Recreation, Built to Spill, Cheese Enchiladas

Runners up:

The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Game of Thrones, The Four Quartets, Illuminations, Packing for Mars, Stiff, The Long Tail, Team of Rivals, Adrian Mole, Neverwhere, The Phantom Tollbooth, How the Beatles Destroyed Rock 'n Roll

Newsies, Holy Mountain, Moonrise Kingdom, Fitzcaraldo, Hannah Takes the Stairs, The Saddest Music in the World, Muppets, Enter the Void, DIG, Big Bird in China

Breaking Bad, Upright Citizen's Brigade, IT Crowd, Daria, The State, The Mighty Boosh, Fawlty Towers, Mad Men, Daily Show, Nevermind the Buzzcocks (UK), Portlandia, The Simpsons

Double Dagger, Mac Dre, Nicolas Jaar, Youth Lagoon, The Beets, Shugo Takumaru, Forest Swords, The Death Set, Magnetic Fields, Drake, The Beach Boys, The Zombies, Neutral Milk Hotel, Kisses, Patsy Cline, The Contortions, Capstan Shafts, (et al unto infinity)

ARTISTS: (kind of a crime this isn't included)

Picasso, Caravaggio, Rothko, Schiele, Kandinsky, Klimt, Banksy (so trendy).
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Vinyl records 1-6 of my complete Buddy Holly box.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Paying it forward...
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Attempting surreal adventures of infinite improbability.

But, that's a bit abstract so let's flatten it out. I'd say generally after the show it's the afterparty. Then, I suppose, after the party it's the hotel lobby. And, yeah, now that I think about it, after the Belve then it's probably Cris. And after the original, it's probably this...

Or, you know, just an episode of This American Life capped with a book before bed.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I once lived in a nursing home for five months. Didn't need okcupid to connect with ladies back then ;)

Also, I snuggle pillows when I don't have a woman around. A somewhat less fufilling experience in my mind.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You are repelled by everything you see here (we'll probably have a lot to learn from each other). You have a story to tell (I'll absolutely offer you a whopper in return). You want to put you good will to the test...

You want to listen to Red House Painters "Ocean Beach" on double-10inch vinyl and talk about how the black sand in SF is icky. Or, you know, something you actually care about...