Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy

rampage303

27 Denver, CO Man

Man

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 21–99
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 12:45am
Orientation
Straight, Sapiosexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body type
Athletic
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sign
Virgo, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Working on university
Job
Entertainment / Media
Income
Status
Open relationship
Type
Strictly non-monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I’ve had a profile on here for years and years now, hence the 90’s naming scheme. (Though it was almost certainly the 00’s when I joined.)

Lately I've been trying to get by on loans and odd jobs in the arts until school resumes, so I may finally slay that useless degree. My circadian rhythms have drifted toward the nocturnal, so I'm getting a lot of reading and learning done while teaching myself to paint until sunrise. Or working out, because though it's an aberration of the human condition, I'm curious if I can get a sixpack without anorexia since I'm young and healthy.

Am I lonely? Occasionally. Am I in it for the sex? Eventually, I suppose. Aren’t most of us, in one way or another?

I mean, isn’t the entirety of society? All the nuances of society with all of its color, right angles, and industrialized food production? At the end of the day, isn’t it all just a fantastic support system for our genitals?

The only way to escape the machine is asexuality.
And while that might leave you with a lot of time for other pursuits and hobbies, relationships, and the things that go along with them are some of my pursuits and hobbies. And that’s why I’m not a monogamous man. One person can be lovely. More can be lovelier.

In summation: If you’re into monogamous relationships, great. I’m not and you probably will find me a waste of your time in that respect. If you’re up for a conversation that could lead somewhere, you should write me.

Actually, the other side of the coin, now that I reflect, seems to be that if it has nothing to do with survival, that it could be considered art. Although survival of the species and starvation could be reasons why one might make a painting. Sex and a paycheck, and hopefully dinner comes into play somewhere. I do like cooking. But if there's an art to it, isn't that embellishment for the genital support machinery? Adding sodium in the pursuit of transforming matter sounds more like science to me. And I don't know that the perfect amount of salt leads to sodomy.

I can be verbose, but I seldom send the first message, since being a woman on a dating site means being inundated with awful pricks saying awful things. Or at least endless reams to waste your time. I actually read people’s profiles and questions. Because you’re people.

Unless you’re a robot, in which case, there are better examples of humanity than me to pass that Turing test you’re studying for. And if you’re a dead person, might I recommend www.ghostsingles.com? (I think they discriminate against the corporeal though. Sorry vampires and zombies.)

My turn ons include curly hair and original thoughts. And dyed hair. And humor. And eloquence. I enjoy all sorts of booze that's good enough not to warrant a chaser, few tobaccos, and some mind altering substances like hallucinogens and caffeine. And alcohol, I suppose. I do not enjoy long walks on the beach because I don't like the beach. Give me an arroyo or a mountain any day. Hell, even an urban environment when the city feels abandoned, or a neighborhood when the gardens are in bloom. On occasion I've been known to sneak into old graveyards under cover of night to have sex or listen to Mozart's requiem. It's about the same level of enjoyment. A couple if times I've wandered into house parties and that's had different results. Actually, don't stress if your hair isn't dyed or curly. Or you don't have any at all. What turns my head is different from what turns me on.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Turning forms of carbon into other forms of carbon.
There’s a lot of art. I’m trying to expand from the wide, wide repertoire of skills that film school gave me into other creative fields that may also assure I’ll starve to death. Like painting, photography, acting, writing. All of it, really. And when I finally finish that film degree, then I can begin attempting to pay the debt faster than the compound interest.

In the mean time I make pretty pictures and write terribly fucked up stories. I listen to a lot of music, podcasts, and audiobooks. It makes me seem pretty well informed. I don’t typically feel crushed my existential angst, so I’m either not thinking about it very deeply, or there’s a lot more ignorance to rid myself of to really get down to that deep despair that makes being alive a chore. Then I can make more art and pass on memetic viruses my brain is making. Maybe society is a support system for novel ideas and our genitals. I’d like to think that mine are and antidote to blind optimism. (My ideas, that is. Not my genitals. … “Look upon my cock, ye mighty, and despair!” heeheehee)

Have I mentioned I don’t want kids? I suppose that’s sort of like sidestepping the system. Anyway…

Politically I’m somewhere between a Liberal and Libertarian. A socialist and an anti-federalist. People find a way to ruin either approach, so I don’t identify as a party member. All I know is a pretty much despise the modern GOP. If you disagree, I don’t think you want me around you or inside you.

Also, I intend to finally get my degree this summer. I love learning. I hate school. Not being in debt would be nice too. At this point, that seems more feasible if I get a job with a degree. Which is dumb, since my field(s) has(have) traditionally been quasi-apprenticeship based or just practice. Is there a world in which I can just be a kept artist? Or a gigolo? Maybe ancient Greece, but then slavery is absolutely abhorrent to me. (Even consensual varieties are a bit off-putting.) Oh well. I shall dive into the machine to grease some wheels if not some Greeks.

Adjectives (labels): Polyamorous / Non-Monogamous, ADHD, XY, SNAFU, INFJ, Dandy, Artsy, Hedonistic, Weird, Pope☆, Musical, Visual, Independent, Carnivorous, Virgo, Epicurean, Colorful, Black-clad, Comical, Terminal, Ignorant, Intelligent, Loved, Curious, Hyperborean, Graphomaniac

☆Long ago and in a far off woodland, I was made a Discordian Pope. The bard wearing nothing but a guitar and an immodest robe of green velvet asked of me

"You wanna be a Discordian pope?"

I mulled it over. We were surrounded by pagans and I didn't wish to upset the natives. I nodded slowly with growing enthusiasm.

"Yeah, sure. Wha’ do I gotta do?"

I inquired through the haze of the vile rum concoction I'd used to wash down the strawberry tart, eaten off the vulva of the redhead spread out on the hor d’oeuvres table.
He raised his red Solo cup, filled of water with berries in it. He did half of the sign of the cross in the air between us, and finally said:

"There. You’re a Discordian Pope"

Now I am infallible.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
"Explaining things."

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

....

.....

......

.......

........

.........

..........

...........

............

.............

..............

...............

................

.................

..................

...................

....................

.....................

......................

.......................

........................

.........................

..........................

...........................

............................

.............................

..............................

...............................

................................

.................................

..................................

...................................

....................................

.....................................

......................................

.......................................

........................................

.........................................

..........................................

...........................................

............................................

.............................................

...Are you still reading this?

...

Christ become cracker. Fine, I'll keep going!

"I'm really good at" part ii

The arts, especially visually and verbally oriented ones. Being verbose, it’s useful for padding out a profile with whatever nonsense comes into my head. People generally stop writing me before I can ask them out. It’s a shame, but if I can’t have a conversation with you on here, should I really worry about it in person?

Being a contrarian is a specialty of mine. I get accused of being an optimist, but I suppose it’s more akin to playing Devil’s advocate. I have made at least one optimist cry on multiple occasions. Maybe it’s pragmatism. Labels only get you so far.

I have a myriad of weird trivia that I learned instead of learning how to converse with other children. It’ll probably come up.

Goth “dancing.” A friend of mine describes it as “dancing on fire, underwater.” Mine tends to be more lively, and lately has spontaneously started incorporating some belly-dancing, martial arts, and Michael Jackson footwork. I have no explanation for this.

Pretending to know what I’m doing when I play guitar alone. Less so on flute, harmonica, piano, bass, viola, or keys. But I’m largely self-taught on guitar, so I think I could be worse. Maybe I’ll subject you to it if you like. If you don’t play, it’s probably not awful. I think it’s fun in any case. I think I have about 7 guitars, so I must be into it more than the others.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
That I look just like someone they know or have seen. Sometimes this results in autograph requests. I have to hope these people are temporal tourists, because I don’t think I’ve done much aside from some plays and weird stories. I also get asked if I’m a priest or a reincarnated leader of Tibet once in a while. Those raise some bizarre possibilities.

Aside from that, I am tall, and I’m constantly told I’m taller. I swear, I’m not taller than tall. I have the wild hair of a madman, so maybe you’re just thinking it’s my skull.

I wear a whole lot of black and dress clothes. Sometimes a hat. I’m particularly fond of Italian wingtips and pinstripe slacks. Sometimes a tie and a jacket that’s not leather. Aside from that, some odd jewelry that and accessory tendencies that make me suspect that I am become Depp.

Others have commonly described me as:
"Hey, aren’t you [insert stranger's name here]?"
A strange Depressed Hippie / Upbeat Goth...
A dirty dandy.
"A lot of person."
A sapience of pure swart.
"A reluctant angel."
"The bee's knees."
"Tall, Dark, and Ridiculous."
"The most theatrical person I know."
"... Not a sociopath."
"Pretty."
"...Just trying to get feminist pussy." To which I replied: "I AM A FEMINIST PUSSY."
"I believe you're a good lover because you're a good person."
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books:

1984, Red Dwarf, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, The Watchmen, Stardust, Slaughterhouse 5, The Shining, Pet Sematary, H.P. Lovecraft, Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas, Hiroshima, Carrie, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, The Long Hard Road Out of Hell, The Dragons of Eden, American Theocracy, Childhood's End, Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, Guns Germs And Steel, Catcher in the Rye, Neverwhere, American Gods, Smoke and Mirrors, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, Good Omens, The Sandman, The Dark Knight Returns, Danse Macabre, Rant, The Life and Times of Gregorii Rasputin, Bonk, Spook, Stiff, The Dark Tower series, The Road, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Lamb, Moby Dick, Illuminatus!, The Evolution of God, Siddhartha, Fool, 1Q84, I Claudius, Blood Meridian
Numerous books on Eastern philosophy, abnormal psychology, history, are usually occupying my ipod too. Along with Stephen King.

Last Book Read: Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

Currently Reading: The Worst Hard Time, The Evolution of Civilization, 23 Thing They Don't Tell you about Capitalism, The World until Yesterday

Movies (motion pictures, films, videos, talkies):

COMEDY:
Airplane!, Army of Darkness, Bad Santa, Beetlejuice, The Birdcage, Dogma, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Ghostbusters, Grosse Pointe Blank, I Heart Huckabees, Men in Black, Monty Python's The Meaning of Life, Oh Brother Where Art Thou?, Office Space, Pulp Fiction, SLC Punk, Stranger Than Fiction, Thank You for Smoking, The Addams Family, Austin Powers, Being John Malkovich, The Blues Brothers, Coneheads, Death Becomes Her, Dr. Strangelove, Everything you ever wanted to know about sex but were afraid to ask, Gremlins, Groundhog Day, Harold and Maude, Last Action Hero, Mystery Men, Nine Dead Gay Guys, Popeye, Rat Race, Shrek, The Sandlot, Saved, School of Rock, Shaun of the Dead, Short Circuit, So I married an Axe Murderer, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Tropic Thunder, Black Dynamite, Walk Hard, The Other Guys, Paul, Some Like It Hot, The Rum Diary, The Other Guys, Calvary

DRAMA:
12 Angry Men, American Beauty, American History X, The Aviator, Dances With Wolves, Edward Scissorhands, The Elephant Man, Gangs of New York, Ghost Dog, Goodfellas, Grave of the Fireflies, Interview With the Vampire, Perfume, The Pianist, The Prestige, Requiem for a Dream, The Seventh Seal, The Shawshank Redemption, There Will Be Blood, To Kill a Mockingbird, Apocalypse Now, Apollo 13, Bamboozled, The Departed, Forrest Gump, Gattaca, The Messenger, Mullholland Drive, The People vs. Larry Flynt, Rashomon, Tideland, Titus, Dead Ringers, Road to Perdition, Network

SCI-FI & FANTASY:
12 Monkeys, 2001: A Space Odyssey, The Adventures of Baron VonMunchausen, Alien, Alien Nation, Back to the Future, Blade Runner, The City of Lost Children, Dark City, Dune, The Fountain, Highlander, Lord of the Rings, The Matrix, The Never Ending Story, Pan's Labyrinth, Planet of the Apes, Signs, Star Trek, THX 1138, Transformers, War of the Worlds, A.I., The Abyss, Alice, Altered States Bicentennial Man, Brazil, Cronos, The Day the Earth Stood Still, Dragonheart, E.T., The Fifth Element, Green Legend Ran, Hook, Howl's Moving Castle, Minority Report, The Point, A Scanner Darkly, The Secret of NIMH, Tank Girl, They Live, Time Bandits, Waking Life, What Dreams May Come, Wizards,

THRILLERS:
American Psycho, The Butterfly Effect, The Caveman's Valentine, Eraserhead, The Forgotten, Frailty, Hard Candy, Jacob's Ladder, Jaws, Momento, The Mothman Prophecies, No Country for Old Men, Perfect Blue, Pi, Red Dragon, The Sixth Sense, The Terminator, Training Day, Children of Men, The Dead Zone, The Devil's Backbone, Hannibal, A History of Violence, Le Samourai, The Machinist, The Ninth Gate, The Others, Pitch Black, Resevoir Dogs, Strangers on a Train, Syriana, Taxi Driver, Vanilla Sky, The Village, M, The Lady Vanishes, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, Red State, Brick, Dark Passage, Whiplash

HORROR:
Dracula, Dawn of the Dead, Gingersnaps, The Hunger, May, The Mist, Pet Semetary, The Ring, Saw, Seven, Silent Hill, The Thing, Tremors, 28 Weeks Later, Child's Play, The Day After, The Descent, The Devil's Rejects, Silence of the Lambs, Planet Terror, Frankenstein, Night of the Living Dead, A Nightmare on Elm Street, The Omen, Poltergeist, The Prophecy, Rosemary's Baby, Salem's Lot, The Serpent and the Rainbow, Session 9, The Shining, Silence of the Lambs, Wolf Creek, Wait Until Dark, The Blair Witch Project, Halloween (remake), Nosferatu The Vampyre, Antichrist, Let The Right One In, Let Me In, Dead Ringers, Melancholia, Evil Dead, Psycho

ACTION & ADVENTURE:
Batman, Blade, The Bourne Identity, Cloverfield, Desperado, Die Hard, End of Days, Enemy at the Gates, Equilibrium, Fight Club, The Good the Bad and the Ugly, High Plains Drifter, Indiana Jones, Jeremiah Johnson, Jurassic Park, Kill Bill, King Kong, The Last Samurai, Natural Born Killers, Pale Rider, Pirates of the Caribbean, Predator, The Professional, Robocop, Sin City, Sleepy Hollow, Spider-Man, Star Wars, Stargate, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, X-Men, Apocalypto, Bonnie and Clyde, Casino Royale, City on Fire, Constantine, The Edge, Gladiator, Hero, Hidden Fortress, House of Flying Daggers, The Hunt for Red October, La Femme Nikita, Master and Commander, Mission Impossible, Seven Samourai, Yojimbo, Zatoichi, Le Samourai, Drive, Coriolanus, Kingsmen

DOCUMENTARY:
Buy the Ticket Take the Ride, Crumb, The Weather Underground, American Hardcore, Baraka, The Business of Being Born, A Crude Awakening, Dan Aykroyrd Unplugged on UFOs, Jesus Camp, Punk: Attitude, Super Size Me, The Rise and Fall of the Slasher Film, Who Killed the Electric Car?, Woodstock, Dark Days, Super High Me, The Confederate States of America, Good Hair, Kumare

MUSICALS (I hate most musicals):
The Wall, Across the Universe, Little Shop of Horrors, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, anything by Parker and Stone

TV (da idiot box)
The Simpsons, Futurama, The Twilight Zone, Star Trek, Deadwood, The Wire, Breaking Bad, Invader Zim, The Boondocks, Moral Orel, The Oblongs, The Venture Brothers, Archer, The Walking Dead, Mad Men, Battlestar Galactica, Lost, South Park, Twin Peaks, Cosmos, Boston Legal, Metalocalypse, Clone High, Daria, Alien Nation, Dexter, House, The Critic, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, Sherlock, Luther, Black Books, The Kids In The Hall, The X-Files, 30 Days, Roseanne, Torchwood, Ugly Americans, Boardwalk Empire, Game of Thrones, Duckman, Spaced, Hannibal, Vikings, Better Call Saul

Music:

"Turn on the radio! 'Naw, fuck it! Turn it off!"

Well, you can look at the breakdown, but over the last few years I find myself endlessly listening to
Nick Cave,
Sisters of Mercy,
Bright Channel,
The Chameleons,
and The Builders and the Butchers.
It's of course interspersed with much more, but I seldom tire of them.

RANDOM UPDATE:
Today is the day I got into Marvin Gaye.
Let's Get It On is a terrible song.

POST PUNK, GOTH, ELECTRONIC, INDUSTRIAL:
Peter Murphy, Nine Inch Nails, Alien Sex Fiend, Dead Can Dance, Joy Division, Bauhaus, Siouxsie & The Banshees, Sisters of Mercy, The Chameleons UK, The Cure, Depeche Mode, Echo & The Bunnymen, Fields of the Nephilim, Moby, Paul Oakenfold

ROCK & ROLL:
The Doors, Pink Floyd, The Beatles, Thin Lizzy, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Dick Dale, Hawkwind, Led Zeppelin, Queen, The Rolling Stones, Steppenwolf, Deep Purple, Electric Light Orchestra, Tom Petty, Buddy Holly, The Cars, Patti Smith

RHYTHM, HIP HOP, REGGAE, JAZZ, & BLUES:
Portishead, John Lee Hooker, Skip James, B.B. King, George Thorogood, The Kilimanjaro Darkjazz Ensemble, Muddy Waters, Miles Davis, Bob Marley, Ray Charles, Public Enemy, The Mount Fuji Doom Jazz Corporation, Henry Mancini, John Coltrane, The Mahavishnu Orchestra, Bohren & der Club of Gore, Howlin' Wolf

METALS:
Apocalyptica, Atomic Rooster, Marilyn Manson, Motorhead, Mercyful Fate, Black Sabbath, Blue Oyster Cult, Opeth, Judas Priest, Iron Maiden, Type O Negative, Arch Enemy, Dimmu Borgir, Probot, Devildriver

ALTERNATIVE, INDIE, PROG, MISC:
Jane's Addiction, King Crimson, Tool, A Perfect Circle, Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds, The Dresden Dolls, Alice in Chains, The Cardigans, Gorillaz, Bob Dylan, Bright Channel, Sky Cries Mary, The Builders & The Butchers, PJ Harvey

PUNKY:
The MC5, The Stooges, The Pogues, The Dead Kennedys, Big Black

COMPOSERS:
Krzysztof Penderecki, Bedrich Smetana, Johan Sebastian Bach, Bela Bartok, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Ludwig Van Beethoven, Johannes Brahms

FOOD:

I dunno...Um, I like cookies?

American Cuisine,
Ethiopian,
Indian,
Chinese,
Thai,
Japanese,
Mexican,
Jamaican,
Persian
and Granola/Healthy/Boulderite type of foods.

I'm pretty sure if someone opened an Ethiopian/Thai/Mexican/Jamaican/Indian restaurant, I would glut myself to DEATH.

I'd like to be vegetarian, but my body won't let me. I'll console myself with the notion that for aeons, we ran from the animals, and it's our time now.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Stereoscopic Sights

Stereophonic Sounds

Self Statement

Senseless Silliness

Aimless Alliteration

Artistic ... Arts

...Well, maybe not the alliteration bit. That's just ridiculously redundant, but I'm reduced to farcical fun.

Also Sexy Sex. ... I should have stopped at six.
Sl-slutty sex? Consensual conquests? erm, no. Welp, nevermind, I'll make do without the sex. Or the alliteration apparently. Oh, wait! ... Welp... Must choose next word carefully. ... Damn it.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How to add more content to this page while stripping it down to the poetic clarity of Cormac McCarthy, while keeping it as flowery and filled with personality as Raymond Chandler or H.P. Lovecraft, and whether that's a James Joyce bit of hackitude.
Any lit majors know what I'm saying up in that run-on?

How contemptible capitalism is and how I can't come up with a better system since we're animals.

Anything funny.

"Why anything?"

If you're really curious, you can see my twitter feed @ryanflint

Ignorance is bliss. Knowledge is power. Power is corrupting. Tell me more...

The intersection of philosophy, art, and psychology to gain insight into perception and the shaping of the world.

"If you believe something, you're automatically precluded from believing in the opposite, which means that a degree of your human freedom has been forfeited in the act of this belief."
- Terence McKenna

"It doesn't matter how beautiful you are. Someone, somewhere is sick of your shit."

I just take the world with a pile of salt.

Things I'd like to experience.

Trying to make sense of the world, through many eyes.

Philosophical exercises as to how a theoretical god could exist. I can't really wholly believe it. Just existential mind rending.

Eternal now is a concept I can wrap my head around. As is four dimensional time. But I have to wonder if there's a difference. The new physics and the ancient philosophy fight for point of view, and while they do, I still need to eat and put away something for the retirement fund.

"The future's uncertain, and the end is always near. So let's roll, baby, roll!" - Jim Morrison

Space/time is money. Money is the taproot of all evil. Good and evil are arbitrary human concepts.

But time doesn't exist.... For now.

Age/Future/Accomplishment/Decay/Death

"If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

How every right angle and human decision is a support system for our genitals, but everything not directly related to survival is art.

Infinity.

Compassionate Nihilism.

The ADHD that manifests by playing music in my head a lot.

"I think I need some E.S.T! Or a trip to the MOOOON!" - Alien Sex Fiend

How I could possibly ever be as cool as Nick Cave.

What line of reasoning led Lon Chaney's Phantom of the Opera to have a combover. That is some seriously funny shit.

"Fragility of the leprosy bacterium suggests that infections result from something more than casual contact with an armadillo."
-A real sentence in a real scientific paper.

Whether I'll every make proper use of my surgeon's cuffs and shove my arms in some blood and guts while wearing my suit. Because, fuck taking off your jacket.

"The shadow of the ax hangs over every joy." -Cormac McCarthy
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
As the Irish say: "Time's a British invention t'make a man work more than's good for 'im."

Possibly staring up at the moon.
Possibly staying up all night, taking in stories.
Possibly sipping from a flask in public.
Possibly writing a script.
Possibly taking photos.
Possibly wandering about.
Possibly among graves.
Possibly clubbing. (not seals)
Possibly playing guitar until my fingers and ears are sore at me.
Possibly painting.
Possibly editing photos while listening to audiobooks.
Possibly playing video games while listening to audiobooks.
Possibly at a paganistic, orgiastic, bacchanal.

Probably wearing something improbably fancy.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Holy fuck, I'm drunk. Holy drunk, I'm anything at all.

I still buy cds. And occasionally cassette tapes.

Based on past experience, I'll probably shrug in indifference at something you love dearly. Off the top of my head:
Joss Whedon, Doctor Who, Harry Potter, Hip Hop, The Beatles, Indie Film, Industrial, House of 1000 Corpses, Discussion Groups, God, Wes Anderson, Ukeleles, Ben Folds, Indie Music, Bridesmaids, The Social Network, Inception, Casablanca, Amelie, Big Bang Theory, Bars, Radiohead, Musicals, Mumford and Sons, Hunger Games, Hyperbole and a Half, The Great Gatsby, Children, Marjiuana, Sublime, Judd Appatow, Anime, Gun Rights, Deathcab for Cutie, Reality TV, Analog, Extroversion, Faith, Lost in Translation, Weddings, Rocky Horror Picture Show, Vegetarianism, Anne Rice, Ska, Mindless Self Indulgence, Anger, Jack Johnson, Ween, Weezer, Boardgames, Angry Birds, iPads, Bill Murray, The Alchemist, On The Road, Regina Spektor, Johnny Cash, David Bowie, Ignorance, Elliot Smith, Warcraft, Macklemore, Repo!, Cake, Tech N9ne, ICP, Tool, Tina Fey, Strip Clubs, IPA, septum piercings, etc.
If I haven't offended at least one sensibility, I may have to ask you to meet me in a dark alley for a fight to the death, because you are a robot or my doppelgänger, and there can only be one of us.

I am going to die. And I find it overly optimistic to think that some part of me will or should go on into eternity.
Yes, I find Hell to be overly optimistic. All's well that ends.
Hmm.
That's optimistic, isn't it?

I'm somewhere between private and overly direct. Maybe it's a balancing act? In any case I think I'm constantly teetering based on what people tell me.

In the spirit of openness here's a few eccentricities, without having to get to know me.
(Because everything preceding this didn't count apparently. ... In fact, did you read to the end? Or did you just skip to it like a novel? I AM NOT A NOVEL! I AM A MAAAAAAN!)

I can only get off if the other person is getting off. I'd make a pretty ineffective rapist... Unless of course that's what you want...
Which is exactly the sort of thing you ask a wish granting, magical creature when making mischief;
"I wish for you not to grant me this wish."
*GENIE EXPLOSION*

I have done mind altering substances and found the results to be: "Groovy."

I think sex may be my religion. On my knees to please others for hours at a time. To make them cry god's name.

I am progressively less body shy. Having no air conditioning in home or car may be a contributing factor. Also, occasional hotubbing with people who are internet famous in a way you don't show your mother.

I am on FetLife. It is not worth your time to find me.

I enjoy a show about a vampire cop called Forever Knight.
On multiple levels.

I've always really wanted to have sex with a bald lady. Why? Because anyone could shave their head, but no one does. Therefore; it's exotic. Should I just find a dating site for cancer patients?

What panics me on a primal level is trying to encompass the infinity of scale. Large or small, it's impossible to conceive of and it's infinite in either direction. My brain shrieks and retreats at some point and then I'm left wondering what matters for a long, dark, moment.

Which makes me think of this:

“The most terrifying fact about the universe is not that it is hostile but that it is indifferent, but if we can come to terms with this indifference, then our existence as a species can have genuine meaning. However vast the darkness, we must supply our own light.”
Does this explain why Stanley Kubrick's eyes are so rapey?

I refuse to update my IMDB billing info. I'm keeping that $20 a month until I am worth looking up on there.

I have few if any secrets that come to mind per se. But if they were really secrets, would I tell you?
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you don't use some variation of the word "interesting" to describe yourself.

If you answered one of the OKC questions I authored.
They're... something.

You can and will string together more than a couple of sentences. I like to correspond. I will never send you a "hay U wanna fukc?" message. (unless it's funny)
But seriously, write back, have something to say. Be inquisitive.

If you're undead. Because, no matter what variety, that sounds interesting.

If you want a good conversation, a stiff sipping drink, some tasty food, and with someone you find attractive.

You don't think Marylin Manson makes goth music.

If you think Douglas Adams may have been a very sad person.

If you believe apocalyptic scenarios may be an expression of a mind's knowledge about it's imminent mortality.

If you can identify French Cuffs, Collar Stays, Wingtips, Surgeon's Cuffs, Cumberbunds, Cravats, Epaulettes, Gunflaps, or the difference between a Trilby (the douchebag "fedora") and an actual Fedora, because you like a man all gussied up.

If you have an all consuming curiosity and lust for life that one usually only finds in flower children and happy drugs.

If you giggle at Colgate toothpaste because you know what it means in Spanish.

If you only see sunrise willingly because you've been up that long.

If your sense of humor is very broad and you're still baffled by popular culture.

If you have an appreciation for headspace as much as the wide open spaces.

If you have any idea who Charles Beaumont is.

If you find these as pretty as I do:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jA3lc1RUuvs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrd2xf5DIlU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQrm-VEtFPY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MnJgIq48C9k
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbz1VcohOFU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FpgX6HFoD1w
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kU8RwT8ODHA

If you think someone has better hair than Erykah Badu.
[Protip: No one does.]

If you are Erykah Badu.