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31 M Birch Run, MI

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 23–32
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 4:47pm
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
A little extra
Mostly anything
Taurus, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Has dogs

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm miserable and spiteful because you are stupid and ugly. I get up every day cursing the sky, filled with a bitter hatred. A dark rage towards the lessers who surround me fills my heart. My goal is to make everyone around me as miserable as me! I'm very passive aggressive and emotionally needy.

I'm also an active member, in good standing, of the Westboro Baptist Church.

Update: I'm no longer with the Westboro baptist church, as I can no longer tolerate their liberal views.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
When I'm not out stealing money from orphans, I like to leave disparaging comments on social media sites.

I also like to reverse cat call, that's where I moo at passing women.

Other than that, I also like to go to restaurants, be a huge pain, and leave a two cent tip.

I also volunteer at a kill only animal shelter (no adoptions). I also raise money for cancer, not cancer treatment, just cancer.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
- Shooting down every suggestion the group has for a restaurant.
- Turning out in front of people and driving slow
- Complaining about everything.
- Just generally being "that guy"
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My disposition.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Lou Reed's Metal Machine Music
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
The Internet (to complain), my dogs (I love to let them bark all night), the gym (I don't work out, I just go there and grunt loudly), my Bluetooth earpiece, Axe body spray, condescension (look it up).
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How to steal the joy from others.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Calling the cops on moderately noisy neighbors.

Drinking alone and sending vague and creepy texts to female acquaintances (I have no friends).

Volunteering at the National Center for the Encouragement of Child Abandonment (NCECA)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I know how annoying I am.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Don't bother. Can you even read?

Women don't tend to go for nice guys like me anyway.