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28 Tucson, AZ Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 20–38
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 3:56pm
6′ 1″ (1.85m)
Body type
Strictly anything
Atheism, and laughing about it
Scorpio, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of university
Seeing Someone
Mostly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
hi how are you?
i am good thank you for asking

i am dating a cute girl. we both have profiles here (she is respectfulmom420) and we talk about profiles that we read and send them to eachother on aim when we're sitting a foot away from eachother. it's lame but cool.

i recently moved back to tucson after being away for nearly a decade, the reasons behind the move were less than favorable to be sure but we're trying to make the most of it, and especially looking for cool bros to hang out with. are you a bad enough bro to hang out with us? probably, yes.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
not a whole fucking lot. we moved as of a couple weeks (EDITORS NOTE: NOW SEVERAL MONTHS (EDITOR'S EDITORS NOTE: A FULL YEAR)) ago and have jobs in menial positions at dumb places for morons, we also watch netflix and the worst reality television you could imagine
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
cartwheels. am i not doing them?
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
i dunno, i can be relatively quiet but that usually changes fast.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
books: to be determined

movies: i'm shamefully into basically everything wes anderson has ever made. i have also seen the room and birdemic more times than anyone should ever admit

music: oh man so much shit. ask for a if you really wanna know. e: here is a loose top 10 for 2013, maybe that give you idea?? yes, maybe

deafheaven - sunbather
cheatahs - extended plays
foxing - the albatross
the world is a beautiful place & i am no longer afraid to die - whenever, if ever
their / they're / there - s/t
crash of rhinos - knots
mutual benefit - love's crushing diamond
snow what - so white

k thats all i got so far. thanks for reading!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

food: i love to cook and love food, which is how i got so fat. i really like exploring different cuisines and trying to make them myself, cultural appropriation is wrong but sometimes tasty

i'm also really into "alternative" ""comedy"" so if you like such things as: doug loves movies, comedy bing bang theory, reality show show, or hollywood handbook we cool.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. air!!! hahahahaha get it
2. water??????? this guy is crazy!!
3. shelter!! what?? WHAT A CURVEBALL
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
my son is also named bort
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
at home watching tv w/ the gal pal, harassing our multiple cats
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
i've spent literal hours trying to find that wifeswap episode with the raw meat family online to no avail.

i also sit around contemplating buying myself a notepad so i can write down jokes & get out of this one horse town as Famous Comedy man

Also since this has come up a few times no I am not actually a dad, except in my spirit and affinity for deck building and Canadian rock band rush
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you want to watch/discuss bad reality tv, watch some shitty movies, just pal around, you know the score