Pre-Disclaimer (or PD to those in the know)

I tend to view character limits as a challenge rather than a distant concept that won't apply to my profile. If long profiles bore you or aren't your thing, you should probably move on.

Disclaimer (especially if you are a guy)

First and foremost I want to stress that I really am hoping to find more friends in my area. One of the most frustrating things about these sites is how it is almost impossible to approach someone of the same sex just to say "Hey, you sound cool, we should hang out" without setting off various forms of "I don't swing that way" to the people you may contact. And I can understand completely, if I got a "hey you're cool" from another dude, I would definitely find myself wondering what their angle was, and considering whether I should always be cognizant of whether they have access to my backside, "That's ok, you walk in front, I'm good."

As such, I've only really pursued communicating and meeting women, and this has been great, but has its own challenges. The biggest one is that unspoken evaluation that always seems to take place, "Would I date this person? Is this person hoping that I will want to date them? etc." Plus, the other result of always approaching things this way is that I don't know any guys with similar interests to me. None of the amazing female friends I've made through this site are really that interested in just playing video games all weekend, or taking in a round of golf, or talking about girls in a way that most women would find offensive because they don't really understand how that works.

My point of this rambling is simple, I want to meet men as well as women, but not because I'm gay or bi-curious, but because I honestly just want to meet fun people and hopefully make some new good friends.

Back to the profile

While navigating this minefield of convincing whoever has happened upon my profile that I am worth their time without sounding like a braggart or someone stuck in the doldrums of chain emailing anyone in his zip code, I'd like to point out that I tend towards witty banter, over analysis, and the pursuit of new experiences more than drinking, partying, or the comfort of a rut.

I've been single for a while now, and while I enjoy dating, I would ultimately like to find someone to connect with on a less casual level. That being said, I'm looking for fun cool people that I can make plans with on the weekends. Intelligent, opinionated, independent, stubborn? We'd get along swimmingly. I'm also the proud owner of two rescue greyhounds, so dog lovers are welcome as well.

Some things we may have in common, or at least serve as a healthy groundwork for a few conversations; I have been taking ballroom lessons for over a year now, I am a board game fanatic, and will happily recommend some games for you to try, if I haven't seen a movie that you really liked already, I will go out of my way to see it so that we can discuss it. I'm also agnostic, fairly liberal, and very open minded. I think that covers the main bases.

I occasionally play around on flagmod, so if you are wondering why I viewed your profile, that's most likely it.

The all new superblunt section (tm)
So I've been thinking that I needed to add some spice to this profile. I've read through it and it all feels just a bit too safe. I want to mix things up a bit, so here is some frank honesty:

- Intelligence is sexy. I don't know about the other guys you've talked to, but showing me up in a debate or some matter of intellect is the quickest way to turn me on, so please don't feel you should hold back. I place a great amount of importance on intelligence, and will only date someone whose mind I respect. I think part and parcel with this is a healthy curiosity about life and experiences in general. This isn't meant to drive anyone away, but hopefully encourage some to say hello.

- I am proud to be a geek. I have a collection of geeky shirts, and I spend a lot of time doing geeky things. This isn't to say that I don't mix well with non geeky people, in fact I handle myself extremely well, but if you think you may want to spend any amount of time with me on a regular basis, the geek stuff is something you would hopefully embrace as well. I’m geeky about board games, fantasy novels, ballroom dancing, and spoken word poetry, to name just a few things; I’d love to hear what you are geeky about. As a side note, I always seem to be really drawn to and appreciate artistic people.

- If the only game you play is "The Sims" or some variant, please don't say that you like video games. Don't get me wrong, I like The Sims as well, but that shit gets a guy's hopes up and it just isn't cool.

- I am a very open, blunt person. If I say something to you, I mean it, and I generally avoid playing games. This type of no holds barred open communication can sometimes be biting, but I've always felt it was the way to go. This means that if you message me and I'm not interested in you, I will tell you so, nicely. If you want my opinion on something, I will give it to you, (and I will manage to have an opinion on anything) and be happy to discuss it, and I genuinely mean every compliment that I happen to send your way.

- Please don’t assume anything stereotypical about me. Some stereotypes about geeks, men, internet daters, and bachelors may certainly apply, but I would much rather you not assume they do and be pleasantly surprised by the ones that don’t.

- Amidst all that I have said, I am not the slightest bit judgmental or prone to take offense. I honestly can’t remember that last time something offended me; I just don’t have the mindset for it. The sooner someone comes to realize that, the better, because it almost always is followed with a full disclosure of that person’s beautiful eccentricities that they often fear are off-putting, but I more often find fascinating. You can tell me absolutely anything, and I am not going to judge you for it, but will most likely have some follow up questions, more out of curiosity and interest than anything else.

Professionally I am an Information Security Analyst that focuses on the security of web applications. Translated into non-technical terms, I help companies ensure that their web applications, like online banking, are secure. It's a great job; I get to work from home, and occasionally travel the world. Recent trips include Japan and India.

Personally, I am enjoying time with my dogs and generally hanging out with friends when I am able. For a time I was hoping to move to Indianapolis, but a total crap housing market and recent influx of cool new friends in the area has convinced me to stay for a while longer.

Communicating exactly what I’m thinking to people. Unless this whole profile has confused you so far, in which case, strike that.

Listening, drawing connections to seemingly unrelated things, recommending new music and movies to friends, games of all kinds, letting people know where I stand on things, getting wrapped up in a new fascination, remembering where I was in a conversation in spite a bevy of tangents, large collections of thoughts resulting in little more then sentence fragments.

I’m really good at making decisions; I’ll only stand for “I don’t know, what do you want to do?” once before just deciding on something. The same thing applies for restaurant choices.

It only seems fair that there be a “I’m Really Bad At” section, so here goes:

I’m Really Bad At

Not debating something that I still feel like I have things to say about, staying in touch with friends that aren’t nearby, remembering important dates, saving money, keeping up with current events, telling people more then just what they want to hear.

Don’t say I didn’t warn ya.

Probably that I am a very big guy, being both tall and stocky has that effect. Aside from that, most likely confidence and a generally positive nature.

Music I pretty much like it all, although I'm not wild about country. I enjoy music in general, and as a result, tend to like the best examples of any given genre, whether it’s folk rock, rap, techno, gospel, barbershop, alternative, industrial, jazz, or even classical. I appreciate the soulful simplicity of just a man, a guitar, his voice, and his passionate woes, just as much as the intricate complexity of the Blue Man Group’s several hand made sound machines. For specific artists, just a taste of what I like would include; Incubus, Maroon 5, Coldplay, Audioslave, John Legend, Tenacious D, Jack Johnson, The Fugees, Simon and Garfunkel, Jason Mraz, Dispatch, Rage Against The Machine, Amy Winehouse, Regina Spektor, Sufjan Stevens, Red Hot Chili Peppers, anything A'Cappella

Movies I used to be a bit more of a movie snob then I am now. I love movies, of all kinds, but typically my favorites are outside the norm. The latest horror flick is a good excuse to cuddle and all, but give me an artistic, well performed drama that has underlying complexity and intelligence to it and causes you to walk out of the theatre feeling like you had witnessed something moving and incredible any day. That being said, sometimes it’s hard to beat a well executed fart joke. Some of my favorite movies include: American Beauty, Amelie, The Big Lebowski, Beautiful Girls, Almost Famous, Labyrinth, Fight Club, Closer, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Serenity, Stranger Than Fiction, Hot Fuzz, Pan’s Labyrinth, Garden State, Donnie Darko, Hero, Kill Bill, Lost In Translation, Punch Drunk Love, Secretary, Sneakers, and Raising Arizona, just to name a few.

Books I enjoy reading very much, and always have a book I’m working on, but I’m an annoyingly slow reader, so I tend to wait until someone has personally recommended a book to me before I will devote any attention to it. In terms of different genres, I think great books tend to rise above their specific genres, great writing, good characters, a fascinating plot, etc. These things can just as easily happen in the streets of New York as they can in the halls of Hogwarts. I tend to enjoy sci-fi and fantasy, not so much for the sci-fi and fantasy though, that’s just been where a lot of my favorite authors have chosen to devote their time. I really like good writing, the ability to paint a scene or the ability to design a plot that is gripping and entertaining. I’ve finally started to branch out from my sci-fi and fantasy shackles, but I return to them often. Some of my favorite authors include: Neil Gaiman, Orson Scott Card, Neil Stephenson, David Sedaris, Augusten Burroughs, and Raymond Feist. Oh, also, don’t think me a high and mighty book zealot, I love me some Harry Potter too ;)

Foods I am definitely not a picky eater. One of my favorite things about when I used to travel extensively for work was all the opportunities to experience new and different cuisines, and I generally liked everything I tried. Some favorites have definitely bubbled to the top though, Thai and Mediterranean. Give me some Tom Kha and a side order of Tabouli and I’ll be your friend for life. I also thoroughly enjoy cooking, but don’t cook very often, since I live by myself. Alton Brown is one of my heroes.

- Intellectual Stimulation

- Companionship

- Purpose

- Hurdles and Triumphs

- Good Food

- Sobe Adrenaline Rush
...
Scratch that, in their infinite wisdom, Sobe has discontinued their glorious energy nectar of the gods, so I'm currently seeking a sixth thing I could never do without.

Too many things, it changes with every passing moment. Currently: I wonder what my dog is thinking, my profiles always end up too long, I hope I'm not sounding pathetic, maybe I shouldn't have written this at 6am without any sleep, I wonder what I will do with my day tomorrow, what hobby du jour will grab my attention next and whether it will last, what's life mean anyways, and the rest of it.

Trying to find people for a movie or game night. Setting up plans for the rest of the weekend. Ballroom dancing.

This is going to sound cliche, but when it comes to dating, I really need a strong, confident woman. Women I've dated in the past have been intimidated by me and it just hasn't worked.

Anything I've said has piqued your interest, you would like movie or music recommendations, you read this whole profile and found it more refreshing then tedious, it strikes your fancy, you live in or around South Bend and are looking for new people to get to know, there is any topic whatsoever that you would like to have a debate about.

If you have strong thoughts about anything I said in my new superblunt (tm) section, either positive or negative, I would love to hear from you.