I am not interested in men with children with rare exceptions

===

While I am into the male form, I'm also not into men who start talking dirty after the first message. It is cheezy and makes you look cheap.

I'd like to believe that men are purer than that. Also if you come off talking dirty it makes me feel like I'm about to encounter a very well-used toothbrush that has been passed through a lot of cavities, so let's keep it clean until things get jiggy.

===
dude, we don't have to be in a bromance, but i'm looking at

hanging out with people

1. who can help me start skating again...
2. can help me learn to code and do stuff. I'm coding in objective-c for iphone apps and I'd like to get into Ruby and Scala.
3. would like to hack on arduino projects and get into embedded. like, this stuff is more fun for me to talk about than other things.

I will not make you take humiliating self portraits of yourself showing off your six pack abs, but it's an option that helps!

--

Silliness:
HUGE DIFFERENTIATOR: I don't do yoga which probably puts me BEHIND everyone else and I screw crap up and am not good at massaging your ego or anything (but i'll massage your back!) but I offer ALL the excitement of a train wreck girlfriend... WITHOUT the train wreck! yes! it's neat. No boring girl next door, but then I also won't overdose on heroin and pass out in the Tenderloin the day before I'm supposed to meet your mother.
All the excitement!
None of the consequences!

programming.
i want to start skateboarding again :( i need to find a safe space to do it.

man i need to redo this one.

I'm not good at:

snapchat-style sex talk on the phone. i dunno, i just wasn't born with the right gene to express this. it's like some women get born thinking it's cool to take pictures of their breasts and dance with other women at the club as if they were lesbians. a lot of people also are genetically predisposed to reading gossip magazines and eating chocolate covered bonbons as the highest form of self expression but that is not my DNA.

"Are you really 37? No way!"
yes way.
I'm 37! it's cool!

"You must be dying to talk about politics. Let me start a 30 minute targeted rant..."
No way!

"you must like comedy... let me talk for 30 minutes on comedy..."
No way!

i'm redoing this.

cometbus

==technical books==
big nerd ranch iOS programming ((it changed my life!))
o'reilly's matt neuberg iOS 5 programming

==favorite computer languages==
I love objective-C! i just love it so much. it's such a hated language. I want to see what small talk used to look like. I want to get to programming arduinos this year.

i'm partial to ruby lately. people are hating on it.

==want to learn==
scala
python

It used to be skateboarding but i don't do that anymore :(

could you help me get started again?

i want to make the planet earth more fair

however, i have boundaries
i have no money, and a l imited amount of time in the week
so please limit your "god i'm so smart!" political rants, it's boring, and we gots work to do!

wishing I was skateboarding

like i dunno believe it or not i'm a big softie especially for good guys. i know i can be prickly but man, there's nothing that freaks me out more than a nice guy in trouble. this is a bad trait at times too.

if i am like jumping in trying to rescue you from destroying yourself, and you just wanted an okcupid date you have to do some deprogramming and then we'll be ok. oh my god but why can't you see how good you are? why does it always have to be about what car you drive and how big your bank account is with you men? you're so messed up. dude! ;)

you are the only one who can save yourself. but i cry when bad things happen to nice guys!
==
I'm 100% heterosexual, and generally 90% of women out there are also heterosexual. I am open-minded and have lesbian friends & have gone to bars, so I am str8 not h8. The thing is, I love to look at men and think they look beautiful, much more so than women, but because we live in a wack culture there are a huge # of single women out there who are poseurs and say they are bisexual. Also, guys think that whenever the word "group sex" or "threesome" comes up, it means one guy and lots of hot women. Since I am straight, the idea of getting naked and having sex with one guy I like and lots of women is really repulsive.
when a woman is heterosexual (which 90% of women are) --> Women are not hot, men are hot, comprende?
Also, guys get really offended when once they bring up "threesomes" I switch it around and say why not lots of hot men in one room, which is really puzzling.
Men are beautiful! they rule! I love them!

You also want to avoid poseur bisexual women because they tend to be really psycho, I know this from personal experience, and if someone is blatantly unaware of their own sexuality, then that is a big red warning flag.

==
like i'm not a big hippie like i'm coming off on these pages but i'm also really privately feeling very lucky to have the freedoms i have and the things i do. it might not be a lot but the freedom to live with very little and be in control of your destiny is really powerful. it's rad.

you're a nice guy but not needing to play into my issues about me rescuing you. you are so not going to exploit that shit. ah, i just get sad when guys work jobs they hate or are in bad situations. do not be mean!

you like to get long massages and get treated right by a lady.

you aren't into self-destructive relationships with unattractive female douchebags who refuse to relinquish control. that is gross. i am not into settling up pavlolvian psych experiments where i get trained to treat you like sh*t because being nice will cause you to be mean to me.
Like I know it makes you high because I used to be into this kind of stuff too (who wasn't a teenager?) but like, I spent a lot of time trying to get away from this. I don't feel the need to get into these patterns of treating people like crap to make them love you. it's grody. You have no excuses after the age of 21 with that stuff. stop it!

==

you love skateboarding and or snowboarding and don't expect someone to go to meaningless dinner parties where everyone is mean to each other.

HONEST
like, i'm pretty blunt and up front. i'm 35 and i don't put up with stuff i would have when i was 20. this is both a good and bad thing, but i believe life is meant to be enjoyed and as painful as it may be, it's much better to be compassionately honest than lead people on or pull bullshit moves that hurt everyone's feelings in the long run.

AGE

It is what it is.

If you are over 34 years old, then contact me only if you skateboard regularly and / or snowboard regularly. Hugs. Saving you time and effort!

MONEY

I prefer blue collar people or men who aren't earning a lot of money. Or if you do accidentally make money it should have been through working hard and doing things in an unusual way. But the less money earned the better. It is what it is.

- If you are a doctor, hopefully you are doing kickass stuff like being a pediatrician to low income youth.
- If you make more than $100,000 you should be involved extensively in philanthropy and not have a string of creepy golddigger girlfreinds. It's not that I'd think you'd be interested, but I'm just being up front about this so that you don't waste your time.

Time is money! ;)

ADVICE

I am not really into the whole Asian fetish thing because it is cheezy but you know, you can't help what you like so here is some advice:
If you have an Asian fetish and are really insecure, you are scaring p*%%* away in a 100 mile radius when you put a photograph of yourself with some low rent Asian girl on your okcupid profile.

Asian-American women are really sensitive about Asian fetish white american guys because there is always some kind of out of control beauty pagaent freaky ex-asian girlfriend involved who left him for some rich guy but wants to maintain control. It is a story as old as time. Not worth the effort. There are other fish in the sea. Do not give asian women the impression that you are under mind control by some psycho Daly City beauty queen who has a louis vuitton purse collection.

So if you're wondering why nobody is talking to you, try to be a bit classier and take that photograph of you with the creepy woman off your profile. Hugs.

More stuff asian-american women cringe at and will red flag upon first sight:
- you talk to them about their exotic "culture" and how you do some asian martial art (it's only OK if you come from some eastern european country where you have no contact with asians)
- All of your ex-girlfriends are Asian women and you are not asian . Creepy!
- You have a deadly combination of hobbies. I'm not saying this is fair but that's just the way it is. I don't know all the magical combinations but there are some things that will be like asian p***y repellant for 10,000 miles around you such as having a manga fhentai collection + hanging out with Skateboarding asian ramp tramps + talking too much about your JET girlfriend from the year you spent teaching English . Even if you are a nice guy this will be like, sending them away and making them tell mean stories to their friends. DON"T DO IT!

asian american women get a lot of crap like "oh i wish i was objectified" but you are so not understanding where we are coming from. imagine walking into a roomful of men who look at you and instantly and subconsciously think you are just like all those creepy women who can't dance and wear awful sexy outfits and want to marry rich guys. it is so sexually turn-offing. i will try to come up with some form of counter-actoin to show you how gross it is but i mean, it's your life, whatever turns you on turns you on. You are scaring all the pu%%y away and you don't even know why. I'm just trying to help you become more self-aware.