Young, globe-trotting professor seeks literate, vivacious woman with whom to partake in cocktails, witty conversation, and exciting adventure. Please send letter of interest, current CV (including languages spoken and read, with level of fluency), and a 20-page writing sample (not counting footnotes and bibliography) to runwrite2, c/o okcupid.com. Applications will be considered on a rolling basis.
Just kidding; by which I mean, don't bother with the writing sample at this stage. My admin assistant will just throw it in with the recycling.