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32 Oriskany, NY Man


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 21-33
  • Near me
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Aug 12
Seeing Someone
6' 1" (1.85m)
Body Type
Agnosticism and laughing about it
Doesn’t have kids and doesn’t want them
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Update 20/12/12:
Yesterday, through happenstance, it came to my attention that this still exists. I'm just going to go ahead and leave it here as a kind of testimonial for whomever happens to stumble upon this in interest or for whatever reason.

Basically, nothing on here apart from my physical dimensions is accurate anymore. Okay, so that's a minor exaggeration. But yeah. My life is completely different. It's dangerous: always on the edge sans a safety net. Literally dangerous to my physical safety most every day. It's financially inadvisable: I do not and I will never have a great deal of money, I am wholly uninsured, and will probably make my end under a newspaper blanket. Or be taken by the sea. However, while crazy and unpredictable, overall it's a much better life than I've ever had before, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

But this update is really for this: I'd like to take the time to say that through what I had written below, I found someone on this site who is undoubtedly, indubitably, inexorably and undeniably basically the perfect woman (to me). Frankly, it's unfathomable. I don't have the words to express my feelings for her, so I won't even try. Yet, through solely my own disfunction, idiosyncrasies, and malformed mind (and I really mean solely - this bitch was that good, ladies and gentlemen), it didn't work out. I really ended up being... an unfortunate incident for that lovely lady. But that isn't particularly relevant here. And besides, she wouldn't like the fact that I've taken up smoking again and roll with Fleur du Pays these days. Good smoke, but no Golden Virginia. Smokers, take note. Golden Virginia: The Shit. Professionally.

What is relevant is that good -check- great -check- shitkickingly awesome people exist and some are even participants of this very site. So for all of you lonesome, large-hearted, well-intentioned individuals... fear not the stigma of using an online dating site or dwell in the hopelessness of never finding a person that fits you. You're a good person, you know it - and there do exist your type of people that can and will appreciate you, genuinely genuinely understand you, and love you for simply who you are, as you are, right now. And they're here on this very site. I can personally testify to that. I am not bullshitting you, and I am not just offering feel good words lacking merit. And I'm a trustworthy individual. Errr... I do know someone who would disagree. But usually! And anyway, who doesn't believe a random self-summary on a dating site? But seriously. Don't lose the hope. Of course, there are also soul-crushing douchebags. Reference: yours truly.

Okay, I'm going to be done now, because thinking about that whole situation is really bumming me out. Shit, man. Shit. For my own part, I can't use this place anymore. Not only would it be an insult to the woman that I met here, and not only am I not actively searching for another person, but she's a seemingly impossible act to follow anyways. Tangentially, how is it that a person can be filled with the overwhelming need to reject something that is nothing but good for them? I don't understand. I just plain don't understand. Anyway, I also just don't have the time nor the inclination, not to mention the network connectivity. But it's a great place filled with a lot of great people. Good luck, and like I said, don't ever, ever, ever lose the hope.

So... so long, and thanks for all the fish.

How many self summaries have I written? A few, over the years. Not too many, I suppose. And, after all, it's fun to think on yourself every once in a while and send little snippets of your personality onto the wide wonderful web to share with... whoever.

Everyone tries to distinguish themselves. They try to stand out. It's like writing a book. You've got a precious few sentences to hook your audience. How can I be intriguing, and yet not off the wall? Strange enough to interest those cool, strange persons out there, but not strange enough to set off alarm bells.

Well, my dear reader, unfortunately I can't do a particularly good job of summarizing myself in a cute, funny, succinct and meaningful way without making myself feel somewhat disingenuous. Because frankly, I don't care to tell you that I'm singularly unique; that I'm smart, funny, capable, or any other attractive quality. That's all in the eye of the beholder, and I'd rather a person made up their own damned mind.

Also, I like to sail. And this cool movie I just saw called The Sasquatch Gang. Aaaaand... the top of a mountain at sunrise. And a good cigar. And what-ifs. Awwww yeah. Gimme some of that sweet sweet hypothetical lovin'. And like... a lot of other stuff. 'Cause you know, people like stuff.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Fixin' to get crazy. I have to be vague. But hey, it makes me... mysterious.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I'm good at eating. I don't think that I've ever tried to eat something and missed. That's like... a 100% success rate. Take that, professional sports!
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I get a lot of comments about my hair. People tell me that they like my hair. I dunno, man. I like my hair too, I guess.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Alrighty, somewhat superficial interests... GO:

Books: Mainly fantasy/sci-fi type stuff. Or dystopian stuff. Or Calvin and Hobbes (Can that count, please?). Fuck yeah. I love that little philosophical asshole. I read, but I'm not a prick that likes to read douche literature so that I can jerk my douche ego off. "Look at what I've read. It's witty, difficult, and avant-garde, demonstrating that not only am I an intellectual, but I'm also edgy and hip. But you've probably never heard of it." Whatever, jackwagon.

Movies: "Cult" comedies. Napoleon Dynamite, Army of Darkness, etc. Classic comedies. Think Mel Brooks. Movies about the destruction of society and its replacement with a superior environment made of testosterone and awesomesauce, re: Mad Max or The Postman. I also just so Happen to be one of those twisted fucks that likes Waterworld. If it's post apocalyptic, I am so there. Action movies.. give me AHNOLD. GET TO THE CHOPPA. Uh... yeah. Girly movies. Romance movies can be cute, but predictable. I prefer the offbeat movies that have tangential romance plots, but sometimes I can go for a chick flick. What? Kids movies. Milo and Otis? Why yes, that movie rocks me. Truth be told, there isn't very much that comes out now that interests me, though. And I'd rather not spend much of my time watching movies in the first place.

Music: I have wide and varied musical tastes!
...(Heard that one before.)
... (Seriously.)
Ok, not really. I like rock and roll. Like the 70's station music. Floyd, Zeppelin and all that jazz. I like some of the newer* rock, like the Smashing Pumpkins and Disturbed. I like songs from a wide variety of genres on an individually merited basis. There doesn't appear to be a good reason why I'll like this R&B song but not that one. Or why this Techno song or Classical song**, but not some others. It's a smattering, and it's not consistent.

*I know this is not new music. But musically, I definitely live retrograde.
**I will not call a classical song a "piece". It's a song. Probably a long one, with a bunch of extra notes from instruments that we don't regularly use in modern music. That does not make it artistically or intrinsically superior. If Metallica's Whiskey In the Jar is a song, well then fuck you, so is the 1812.

Ok, Fewds: I generally eat healthy. Most people would say that I'm a boring eater. On Halloween, though, I eat ALL OF THE THINGS. I also drink way too much diet soda.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
It's all about the basics:

Fresh Air.
The Horizon.
Someone(s) to share it with.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Existence, yo. Us. Our nature. My nature. Meaning. Purpose.

My Dear Family,

Guess what? Today I found out what my special purpose is for. Gosh, what a great time I had! I wish my whole family could have been here with me.

Did I mention The Jerk earlier?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Stickin' my thumb out on mile marker 13,467,368,396 of the Hyperspatial Express Route.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm Batman.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Well, if you feel like it. Cause I'm totally down with meeting some new cool people.

If you feel like you want to... go ahead. DO EET. I'm not a meanie.