One weekend as a kid, my family thought it was a good idea to go see "Boogie Nights." During the film, I whispered to my Mom, "We should go." She said, "NO, we paid for this, we're getting our money's worth!" It got increasingly more awkward.

On the way out of the theater, my Mormon mother, trying to gain some sort of lesson from this experience, said, "Boys, look at it this way, having a large penis only leads to a life in pornography and drug use, you should be proud of your small penises."

This moment pretty much sums up how I became the man I am today.

Need more of a reason to be interested? I have access to my parents HBOGo. Soooo, we're going on a date next Tuesday, right?

After my mother made it clear that a career in porn wasn't for me, I went in the direction of comedy. I'm a writer and comedian with a day job in social media/web stuff.

Tweeting. And introducing people to others. And eating, I eat very well.

My hat and glasses. Diane Keaton has been a surprisingly strong influence on my life.

BOOK: To Kill a Mockingbird. I tend to read a lot of non-fiction, biographies, history stuff. Currently reading Joseph Mitchell.

MOVIES: Terms of Endearment, The Bicycle Thief, Whose Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, The Apartment. I see a lot of movies, typically at least one a week.

SHOWS: My all-time favorite shows are The Golden Girls (duh), I Love Lucy, Roseanne, The West Wing, The Twilight Zone. I don't have a TV, but of the newer shows, 30 Rock, True Blood, The Big C. I'm also a huge fan of anything BBC! I love The IT Crowd!

FOOD: I'm a vegetarian, but not an annoying one (unless me saying that actually makes me an annoying one, which is quite possible). I just don't make a stink about it unless I'm starving and there are absolutely no options.

I'm also allergic to nuts. So Thai food and a steak house are not date spot possibilities.

1 - My Mac products (which includes the phone, iPad, and MacBook; I'm okay with the judgement entering your brain at this very moment)
2 - Fresca
3 - My running shoes
4 - A newspaper
5 - Comedy
6 - Cough drops (long story)

Comedy, Traveling, The Academy Awards, Politics, Running, Diane Keaton, Food

If I'm not performing, I'm at the gym. After that, I'll usually wind up at a bar. Having a lazy night at home doesn't often happen, but on occasion.

I see most Tyler Perry movies on their opening weekend. I know, I know...

You don't take yourself too seriously. And you have your shit together, whatever that means for you. And you can handle a Fresquila (Fresca + Tequila).