I'm an a**hole. I won’t open doors for you, in fact be careful as I
will likely trip you as you go through the door for laughs. I
expect you to cook for me and clean up after me... And by the way,
I’m a really messy eater. Food everywhere, on the floor, in my lap,
but these are the least of your worries.
I leave my socks on the floor in the bedroom. I will not do laundry, and insist that you do it. I don’t do romance, I expect action on the first date, big time action, and I won’t sleep over (yes this will be at your place because I don’t want you to know where I live).
Dating websites say that I should also talk about these four points so as I don’t waste my time and be successful here, so let me address each one:
1. Talk about your hobbies. – kicking puppies
2. Talk about your goals/aspirations – finding a rich woman to take care of me
3. Talk about yourself and what makes you unique – I’m not unique in the least bit
4. Your taste in music – The Cranberries, Enya, Mazzy Star, Lady Gaga, Indigo Girls
OK.. If you're still reading, you:
A: Have an awesome sense of humor and we'd get along JUST fine..
B: Believe none of this is real and want to keep reading to see if I say anything different...
Well the real me is this: I am completely normal, very smart (and sarcastic, duh), successful and driven to succeed in life. I just moved to Indianapolis in May 2013 for a HUGE advancement in my career. I know absolutely no one in this town and would like to meet you for dinner and see if you pass the "interview" (forward, eh?)...
VERY IMPORTANT THINGS:
1. I only date Caucasian women... Sorry - just not attracted to anything else...
2. I prefer athletic/toned/slender body types (basically, just take care of yourself and don't resemble the Michelin Man)
3. You MUST be able to hold an intelligent conversation (this seems to be a hard one)....
4. Know the difference between your/you're and their/there/they're... seriously - it's 9th grade English.
5. I'm not going to lie, if you have kids - this is not a deal breaker, but I prefer to date women without kids.
IF YOU'RE STILL READING... I applaud you, and here's some cool stuff about me:
My name is Sean, I have all my fingers and toes and have never been to jail or hung out at a Walmart on a Saturday night... I am sarcastic and find humor in every single situation in life - Yes, I tend to poke fun at myself.
Other fun facts about me - I am extremely well traveled and hop on a plane to go explore new places i've never been. On the relationship side of things, I have been single by choice for quite a while - My relocation to here means this will be my home for the next few years (or longer if I find a reason to stay.... HINT HINT: YOU!)
I am extremely well mannered, very caring and genuinely want to make my future girlfriend [YOU] happy. I do not cheat... I am not afraid of commitment... I do not play games.... I am by all definitions THAT GUY you can "take home to your parents"...
Send me an email and you'll be pleasantly surprised :-)
I leave my socks on the floor in the bedroom. I will not do laundry, and insist that you do it. I don’t do romance, I expect action on the first date, big time action, and I won’t sleep over (yes this will be at your place because I don’t want you to know where I live).
Dating websites say that I should also talk about these four points so as I don’t waste my time and be successful here, so let me address each one:
1. Talk about your hobbies. – kicking puppies
2. Talk about your goals/aspirations – finding a rich woman to take care of me
3. Talk about yourself and what makes you unique – I’m not unique in the least bit
4. Your taste in music – The Cranberries, Enya, Mazzy Star, Lady Gaga, Indigo Girls
OK.. If you're still reading, you:
A: Have an awesome sense of humor and we'd get along JUST fine..
B: Believe none of this is real and want to keep reading to see if I say anything different...
Well the real me is this: I am completely normal, very smart (and sarcastic, duh), successful and driven to succeed in life. I just moved to Indianapolis in May 2013 for a HUGE advancement in my career. I know absolutely no one in this town and would like to meet you for dinner and see if you pass the "interview" (forward, eh?)...
VERY IMPORTANT THINGS:
1. I only date Caucasian women... Sorry - just not attracted to anything else...
2. I prefer athletic/toned/slender body types (basically, just take care of yourself and don't resemble the Michelin Man)
3. You MUST be able to hold an intelligent conversation (this seems to be a hard one)....
4. Know the difference between your/you're and their/there/they're... seriously - it's 9th grade English.
5. I'm not going to lie, if you have kids - this is not a deal breaker, but I prefer to date women without kids.
IF YOU'RE STILL READING... I applaud you, and here's some cool stuff about me:
My name is Sean, I have all my fingers and toes and have never been to jail or hung out at a Walmart on a Saturday night... I am sarcastic and find humor in every single situation in life - Yes, I tend to poke fun at myself.
Other fun facts about me - I am extremely well traveled and hop on a plane to go explore new places i've never been. On the relationship side of things, I have been single by choice for quite a while - My relocation to here means this will be my home for the next few years (or longer if I find a reason to stay.... HINT HINT: YOU!)
I am extremely well mannered, very caring and genuinely want to make my future girlfriend [YOU] happy. I do not cheat... I am not afraid of commitment... I do not play games.... I am by all definitions THAT GUY you can "take home to your parents"...
Send me an email and you'll be pleasantly surprised :-)
