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36 Portland, OR Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 25–39
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Jul 29
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Not at all
Other, and laughing about it
Leo, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Art / Music / Writing
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
First things first, to get it out of the way: I am a huge dork. Should I lead with this information? 'Probably not', is what a non-dork would say. 'Most definitely', is what a dork would say. So did I just prove my dorkdom by leading with the info, or did I create the scenario in which I proved my own theory that is essentially unprovable (and completely unnecessary to prove, regardless)? And is expounding on this for way too long in fact its own proof? Either way, I love being a dork, because dorks understand something about childhood that most others forget. Like how to play, how to be silly, how to have adventures, how to explore, how to laugh and smile, how to be kind, how to be vulnerable, how to have a big open heart, how to love wholly and unconditionally. These are all things I want in my life, so these are all things I am in my life, and all things I have in my life.

Beyond that, I'm probably best defined by the word 'balance'. I enjoy doing most things, and can really fit in and have fun anywhere. Want to go for an intense hike in the gorge? I'm so there. Get dressed up for a fancy restaurant and a play? I've already made the reservations (and bought the tickets). Talk geeky running things with marathoners? Do it all the time. Talk geeky gear things with the musicians? Do it even more. Serious conversation about our relationships and feelings? That actually makes me super excited. Silly conversation in which we discuss our plans to one day own a donut and ice cream shop? We'll be laughing the whole time. I'll probably even break out into spontaneous dance and song in the style of 'Thriller'-era Michael Jackson to fully express my delight. (I, in fact, did this a while back as I walked into my favorite ice cream and donut shoppe on Alberta St. I had an apple fritter. It blew my mind into a million pieces, which were then put back together by said fritter. It's a magic fritter.)

I live my life with passion and intention. And "So You Think You Can Dance". I don't fit nicely into any categories. I like most things, but love only a few. I can talk sports with the guys, music with the hipsters, politics with the lefties, science with the nerds, and clothes with the girls. I can be shy and introspective, but i can also be the lively center of attention (I am a Leo, after all). I won't bullshit you, though I once ate dog shit. I treat everyone with respect and honesty, which can get me into trouble. I don't drink or smoke, but don't mind if you do, as long as you don't mind if I don't. (I've never had a drink in my life.) I'm told that I smell good, that I'm sexy, that I'm kind, that I am funny, and that I am a unique snowflake. I am an INFJ, which apparently is the rarest personality type. I am a complete dork and glad that I am (as previously mentioned). I am a proud Iowan. I can be very dry and sarcastic, but know when not to be. Becoming an uncle at 16 has and continues to profoundly change my life; I'm consistently amazed at the depth of emotion and unconditional love I feel for those little buggers. I am completely and honestly myself at all times. I will make you laugh hysterically, even if it's only because I'm trying to make you laugh hysterically. In fact, I would consider it a failure of massive proportions if we weren't both laughing hysterically at least 35% of the time, and laughing in silly/dorky delight at least 60% of the time.

I am courteous and polite. I celebrate half-birthdays enthusiastically and with aplomb. I love playing and watching sports. I love cats, mostly because they are kindred spirits. I have longer eyelashes than you. I am smart and well versed in culture and in pop culture and will gladly discuss it with you. I am an old soul, yet often have the carefree abandon of a child. (Methinks that's somewhat the point, no?) I will get you into my band's shows for free. I seem to be able to float in and out of many varied groups, but really belong to none. I play music. A lot. Like, professionally. I used to play ultimate frisbee a lot, until I hurt my feet. Now I run. A lot a lot. I competed in my first race a few summers ago (a 15k) and won. I'm as surprised as you. I just completed my first full marathon on July 4th. I used to eat vegan chocolate banana muffins from the Daily Grind, but sadly, they've closed down. I'm not vegan; I just liked them a whole lot. I'm still searching for a suitable muffin replacement, in vain. If I really like you, I will write you love letters and make you mix CDs. Words are the way to my heart.

To wit, this quote sums up what I am looking for quite nicely:

"There are two ways to reach me: by way of kisses or by way of the imagination. But there is a hierarchy: the kisses alone don't work."
--Anaïs Nin

If you understand this, you're probably already a quarter of the way there.

I do believe that you can build a connection and chemistry through writing and words as a prelude to building the same thing in person. The way I express myself in writing is a hugely important and wholly unique aspect of who I am and one that I would want present in any relationship. I probably won't be interested in meeting if I don't feel a 'spark' in the writing. I understand that the writing and the 'in-person' are not the same thing, and that's kind of the point: I want connection and chemistry in both places in equal measure. I've never had a relationship in my life that didn't have both.

I've spent a good part of the last five years "working on myself", whatever that means. I've never felt healthier emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually. I'm what the kids like to call "emotionally available". Regardless of where any potential relationship goes, I'm looking for the same. I'm not here for sport; I look forward to the day that I can delete this account.

Lately it feels like I've been teaching 10000 stars how not to dance; I want to learn to sing, dammit. I'm looking for my one bird. (Bonus points for catching the reference.)

I still believe in magic; you should, too. At this point, I'll settle for nothing less.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Writing. As mentioned above, I am a word whore. Words are the quickest way to my heart and the second easiest expression of my soul. As such, I do some critical writing for some blogs.

Playing music. The easiest expression of my soul is my fingers on a fretboard. I’m a musician by both profession and passion. I'm currently playing in 9ish bands. I make enough money from music to declare it on my taxes (and write off some silly, ridiculous things), but not enough to quit the dreaded day job (which really isn't all the dreaded...just something I do 8 hours a day, 4 days a week). Music takes up a huge chunk of my time, and I'm truly blessed to do it with highly creative people that are also kind and awesome and counted among my best friends. I get paid to do the thing I love the most in this world with my favorite people in the world? That hardly seems fair.

(I feel it important to note that I'm not your typical or stereotypical musician, whatever that means.)

Running. Not just my exercise, but also my meditation, as I am literally outrunning my thoughts.

Eating chocolate. I have a sweet tooth a mile wide and an ocean deep. (Yet another reason I outrun my sweet tooth and its effects on my body! Ha!)

I think laughing and smiling are two of the most important things we do as humans, and I endeavor to do as much as possible of both each day. I have little time for cynicism or negativity or 'too cool' irony. (See 'dork' paragraph above.)

Really, though... "life is what happens while you're busy making other plans".
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Balance. I am at once both athletic and artistic; emotional and logical; spiritual and grounded; spontaneous and responsible; intellectual and dorky; silly and serious; passionate and calm; introverted and charismatic; analytical and creative; urban and rural; outdoorsy and homebody (indoorsy?). While I see this balance largely as a positive, it does contribute to the feeling of fitting in most everywhere but belonging nowhere.

Other things I'm good at:

--Knowing my own strengths and weaknesses
--Writing guitar and bass lines for other people's songs
--Romance. I'm a hopeful romantic, and choose to have an unending faith in love, kindness, and the inherent goodness of people.
--Making lists
--Winning games. My ideal partner is essentially my ideal game partner, with a few extras thrown in for good measure.
--Taking really long walks, alone or otherwise. (Would love to start making it 'otherwise'.)
--Understanding people
--Setting people at ease, and allowing them to be completely themselves
--Getting along with cats
--Thinking of the perfect song lyric or movie quote for any occasion
--Noticing things others don't
--Pretending not to notice said things, when prudent
--Throwing a frisbee
--Baking apple crisp…yum!

I have wonderful comedic timing and great rhythm in music…and horrible romantic timing. Or so this site would lead me to believe.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My eyelashes. Or the whole eye area in general; my eyes are sparklers.

Or that I've already noticed them.

And while we're on the subject, if you take positive notice of me, go ahead and 'Like' me. Perhaps OKC will let me know, I'll take a look at you (when I might not have otherwise seen you), and be so compelled to write. Or, even better, perhaps I'll have already 'liked' you, and we'll get the "It's a Match!" email, and we'll both feel giggly and compelled to write each other.

Either way, only good things can come of it.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
For someone who is a musician and who writes critically about culture and pop culture, I'm very non-snobbish about my entertainment. I honestly love most types of music and movies, and will undoubtedly listen to or watch anything with you.

Somewhere else I once wrote that I wish my life was like "Moulin Rouge", where we could all break into song and dance at any moment to express our deepest and most personal emotions. "The greatest thing you'll ever learn, is just to love, and be loved in return…."

The world needs to know this:

"Anchorman" is my comedic Bible; in Ferrell we trust.

"Son of a Preacher Man" is my personal theme song for the most obvious reason.

We could probably talk for hours about all of the music we like, but the most important thing to know is that Guns 'n' Roses is the band that started it all for me. Hand to God: I wouldn't be a guitar player if not for Slash. "Appetite for Destruction" had a profound effect on my hormones, thus altering the course of my development through puberty. It's science.

I feel like I need to add "Podcasts" to this list, as I tend to listen to those more than I do music these days. Favorite Podcasts: Bill Simmons, Savage Love, Doug Loves Movies, many selections from Slate, Rock Solid, PTI, a few selections from The Onion, Movie B.S. (I know the 'B' in B.S.), and several others.

The world is divided into people that have discovered "Serial" and those who haven't. In many ways, I envy those who yet haven't their impending journey.

Books: I'm a sucker for Harry Potter and anything by Paulo Coehlo. I also enjoy a good mystery, or a great literary classic. The two most important books for me of the last decade or so are "The Alchemist" and "The Mastery of Love".

I hold a special place in my heart for "Lost"; there are certainly better shows, but none that captured a particular part of my soul at just the right moment. Plus, I watched it on non-DVR'd TV from the very beginning and stuck with it until the bitter end.

Netflix and Hulu have changed my TV habits, and allow me to watch all the shows I would like to watch without being too slovenly.

If one of your ideas for a wonderful weekend/week is binge watching an entire series (particularly during the rainy season), I'm already half in the bag for you, and we'll most likely get along like peanut butter and chocolate. Or bananas and chocolate. Or _____ and chocolate. Mmmm....chocolate.....

'The Daily Show' is my nightly news.

My 14-year old niece (who is a dancer herself) got me hooked on "So You Think You Can Dance", which I now watch regularly. I cry and/or applaud at least 2-3 times per episode. My one reality TV vice.

Food: Yes, please.

Note: This is the section I care about the least. I care what you're like, not what you like.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
"I've got gardens growing, got quiet days
Clothes on my back, food on my plate
Got friends to help me if I call for them
Don't need anything I don't have

Got eyes to see this beautiful land
Feet to take me where I want to stand
If there's work to be done, I've got these two strong hands
I don't need anything I don't have

I've got a roof overhead, stars if I choose
But I've no need to fly, I've got no itch to move
Got almost nothing but I understand
That I don't need anything that I don't have"

If you know this song without looking it up, we must meet and fall in love immediately.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Songs yet to be sung.

The San Antonio Spurs.

How to get out of my head space and into my heart space.

How all the time spent on this site could be time spent with you.
(If you start singing "laughing like children, living like lovers, rolling like thunder, under the covers" after this sentence, we'll almost certainly get along.)

Dating, vis a vis this:

...I have a lot of thought on this. Too many. This article crystallizes a lot of ideas for me.

And ice cream. Always ice cream.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Often playing a show. If I have a free night, I'm hopefully enjoying a wonderful meal, watching a movie (home or theater), and eating Peanut M&Ms. Maybe with you, maybe without.

If I'm really lucky, we're on our way out of town on some fun adventure.

Friday is my Saturday, Saturday is my Sunday, and Sunday is my bonus Sunday. Can you think of anything better than having bonus back-to-back Sundays?

(The correct answer is having back-to-back sundaEs, but I'll also accept having back-to-back-to-back Sundays.)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
If you believe the world of men can be firmly divided into "Breast Men" and "Ass Men", I fall definitively in the "Ass Man" camp. If you believe in such things.

I have a stuffed pet lion named Lawrence; his girlfriend is a stuffed tiger named Tallulah.

I have an obsession with the San Antonio Spurs. Don't ask how it started (though I'll gladly tell you in person), but do know this: I write for a Spurs blog. Embarrassing? Probably. Do I care? not a lick. (I even have a business card to really drive this point home.)

I'm a Dan Savage acolyte.

I'm a wandering toothbrusher.

If forced to choose, I'll take the mountains over the ocean and cats over dogs. It's a true statement that I will probably like you 7-12% more if you own a cat. Which isn't to say that I don't love dogs, or the ocean, or dogs on the beach at the ocean, because I do, quite a bit. But cats and mountains fit my personality and temperament much more accurately, which seems to be in the minority in Portland. (So much so that I fear even admitting this information about dogs will immediately make the majority of you single and eligible women click away from my profile.)

Movies make me cry all the time, even ones that probably shouldn't (like the ending of "Stepbrothers"); real life, not as much.

Most Google Chrome commercials also make me cry. Damn you, Google.

In choosing a mate, my nose might be pickier than I am. (While the pun was not initially intended, I giddily stand behind it.)

I feel compelled to explain just how insane "The Pina Colada Song" is if you truly listen to the story of the lyrics. (Lots of parallels with this site, as well.)

I own about 50 Pez dispensers, but have never bought a single one in my life.

I don't hate Nickelback and Taylor Swift; I kind of secretly love Katy Perry. This statement alone would probably get me kicked out of at least 5 of the bands I play in.

I like to buzz my hair often; call it a pre-emptive strike. Currently, though, I'm growing it out a bit for no good reason and against all good sense. It probably looks terrible; I should probably care more.

I've never eaten at a Portland food cart; I have no reasonable explanation for this.

I love Pop Christmas music. Think "Last Christmas" by Wham. "What Are You Doing New Year's Eve?" by Rufus Wainwright rocks my world. Hard. Almost to tears.

I might want to fall in love and move to Austin, TX. Or somewhere else…?? Or fall in love and build a life in Portland. Hopefully the constant is obvious.

I enjoy admitting private things that probably aren't all that private, and simultaneously say nothing and too much about myself.

I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom. Oh, wait...that was Humpty. I get the two of us confused sometimes. Though, to be fair, I'd be much more likely to be do that in a Burgerville bathroom.

I'll tell you just about anything, but that doesn't make me easy to get to know.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."

--Albert Einstein

For starters, we must agree on which way to live our life.

You fit this mold:

Someone who lives with intention and passion. Someone funny, who doesn't take themselves too seriously. Someone who believes in the redeeming power of culture and pop culture. Someone not ashamed to admit liking a few Journey songs in a completely non-ironic way, even beyond "Don't Stop Believing" ("Faithfully" and "Open Arms"? I'm forever yours). Someone who takes care of themselves on many different levels. Someone who doesn't fit easily into categories, that can't be hemmed in: a rocker, a runner, a dork, an intellectual, a goofball. Someone who understands that who you spend your time with is more important than where you spend it. Someone who likes gifts and surprises, both giving and receiving, both large and small. Someone who is a gift and a surprise. Someone confident and strong. Someone who doesn't need anyone, but wants someone to share with. Someone hilarious. Someone who goes to parties but doesn't 'party' (it's the difference between a noun and a verb). Someone who likes movies. A lot. Someone who is not pretentious or judgmental. Someone beautiful and cute in a way that only gets better with time. Someone who understands the importance of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual maintenance. Someone smart who won’t wield their intelligence like a weapon. Someone who I could introduce to mom, and who would actually enjoy it. Someone with a little bit of a wild streak, but mostly behind closed doors. Someone who understands the importance of weekend breakfast. Someone I can play with. Someone to continually surprise me. Someone creative, in whatever way she see fit. Someone caring. Someone with fire but without anger. Someone who understands that sometimes you have to eat at Burgerville. Someone to talk about things with, or to not talk at all. Someone real.

Doing this stuff together appeals to you:

Taking a stroll down and around the river, stopping for lunch at the Waterfront park. Going for a walk or a jog to the top of Mt Tabor near sunset and looking out across this beautiful city. Heading over to the Laurelhurst theater to catch a movie. Driving through the Gorge and stopping at every waterfall along the way. Going to a marble slab for a wonderful ice cream concoction. Going to the coast and doing some hiking. Going to see a Blazer's game, then heading out to catch a show afterwards. Making strawberry lemonade in the summer, hot cocoa in the winter. Playing, laughing, giggling, and smiling like little kids. Cuddling and kissing like bigger kids. Playing frisbee in the park. Getting breakfast on Sunday morning then heading immediately back to bed. Or just spending all morning in bed. Snuggling up for a TV show binge watch marathon at home. Getting dressed up to have a nice dinner at Jake's downtown, saving plenty of room for a delicious dessert (Chocolate Bag, anyone?). Talking all night. Not talking all night.

You might want to fall in love and move to Austin, TX.

You want to adore and be adored in equal measure.

Your idea of adventure is more about the 'who' than the 'what' or the 'where'.

You want to move quickly into taking it slow.

You feel excitement when you hear cheesy love songs, eagerly anticipating feeling that way about another person again.

But I'd settle for somebody to sing the female parts (to my male parts) of Positive K's "I've Got a Man".

I have a motto in life that the company you keep is far more important than where you keep it, and I'm much more interested in finding that company than finding that adventure. Because once you have that person, every day of life is an amazing adventure, and the 'what' really becomes secondary to the 'who'. Finding that is life's true adventure.

I value kindness and compassion above all else; throw in humor and honesty, and you'll have my heart forever; throw in delicious baked goods and...well, I don't even want to know what at that point. Ultimately, I want a genuine relationship based off of an authentic connection, the kind that can only be born from vulnerability, trust, truth, communication, commitment, passion, and lots of the aforementioned laughing and smiling. and i mean lots. :) <---See, like that: smiling. (I did mention i was a dork, right?)

If you're going to write to me first and you're truly interested, go for it. Be bold, be inspired, be vulnerable. That Nin quote way up at the top ain't for nothin'.