First of all, to anyone who hasn't actually taken my Internet/SMS Literacy Test, click here.

So, thanks to all the people who did my Internet/SMS Literacy Test! Since some of the references are a bit obscure or tricky, I figured an answer key might be needed. Before I get into that, though, here are a few links to check out if you want to brush up on your language skills...

Wikigrounds
This glossary covers a good range of slang you might find on discussion boards.
Urban Dictionary
Various verbal, SMS, and Internet slang are listed here. All entries are user-submitted.
Wikipedia: Leet
For a history of Leet/133t/1337 language and some of the most common terms.
4chan Glossary
This page serves as a glossary for some of the most common terms/phrases to spring from website 4chan.org.

Anyway, the answer key is below! The correct answer to each question is in bold. If you have any additional questions, shoot me a message!

1. When might I use the term ASL in chat with someone online?
When propositioning them for casual sex.
When expressing that I find them attractive.
When first meeting them.
When I cannot understand what they're saying.

(ASL - Short for age/sex/location. Most of you seem to know this one.)

2. Which one of these SMS/133t abbreviations has a different meaning from the others?
TTFN
BCNU
TTYL
BRB

(From top to bottom: Ta Ta For Now, Be Seeing You, Talk To You Later and Be Right Back - option d) is not a farewell.)

3. When would you probably NOT use the term 'lol' in web-based chat with someone?
When the other person has said something you find genuinely funny.
When you want to keep the conversation moving to avoid awkwardness.
After you've said something silly or lame, in recognition of that fact.
When the other person has said something offensive.

(I did give half points for option a), just because it's rare for people to use 'lol' to express genuine humour these days - usually something else will replace it if the writer is genuinely amused.)

4. Orly?
Yrly.
No, anally.
Nrly.
Huh?

(Orly - short for 'oh really'. Yrly, short for 'yes, really'.)

5. If I were to say "Tom Cruise FTW", I would basically be saying...
That I support Mr. Cruise's endeavours and wish him success.
That I would like to beat Mr. Cruise to a bloody pulp.
That I am puzzled and perplexed by Mr. Cruise's behaviour.
That I want to become a Scientologist.

(Tom Cruise FOR THE WIN. I hope nobody has ever wrote that and meant it.)

6. If I were to say "Tom Cruise WTF", I would basically be saying...
That I support Mr. Cruise's endeavours and wish him success.
That I would like to bed Mr. Cruise.
That I am puzzled and perplexed my Mr. Cruise's behaviour.
That I would like to bed Katie Holmes, aka Mrs. Tom Cruise.

(Tom Cruise WHAT THE FUCK? This one makes much more sense to me.)

7. A phrase popularised by websites like 4chan.org is "the cake is a lie". When would "the cake is a lie" be a socially appropriate phrase to use online?
When declaring that something said/posted was homophobic.
When declaring that something said/posted was questionable or incorrect.
When declaring that something said/posted was weak, ineffective or hopeless.
When declaring a hunger for vanilla sponge filled with cream and decorated with fresh strawberries.

(This one's pretty self-explanatory - just read option b). And yes, I know 4chan users were not the only people to spread use of this term, but it was one of the most noticeable sites for it.)

8. So... what can we assume was most probably wrong with the video that Oliver received?
It didn't send properly and Oliver couldn't view it at all.
It was probably sexually explicit.
It was probably sexually explicit, verbally obscene or otherwise unprofessional.
It grossed Oliver out.

(Since SFW means 'safe for work', we can assume that anything not work-friendly would be an issue. This includes more than just sexual content, though you got half points if you took option b). Option c) gets full points.)

9. And who would the "she" referred to in the conversation most probably be?
Oliver's girlfriend or significant other.
Oliver's housemate.
Oliver's imaginary friend.
Oliver's boss.

(Again, SFW... you work it out.)

10. What does Oliver's last response (at 1:06pm) tell us about the female he's referring to?
She's there and he needs to leave the conversation.
She's there and has just told him she didn't mind the video.
She's not there.
She's there and is being sexually suggestive towards Oliver.

('XD' is an expression of happiness - look at it side-on and it looks like a grinning face. Kinda. We can infer, then, that the reason Oli's happy is because his boss is absent.)

11. The SEGA video game Zero Wing was responsible for a lot of poorly translated dialogue. Which phrase from the game has become popularised as a running joke in the online community?
"All your base are belong to us."
"All your bases or belong to us."
"To ask me on a data?"
"To ask me in a date?"

(For the record, option c) refers to a bit of poor translation, too. In the Super Nintendo RPG "Terranigma", approaching one of the girls in the town Neotokio is met with the line "...to ask me on a data? But you're dressed so odd...")

12. If I type "/sarcasm" in a message, what am I indicating?
That the last sentence, statement or paragraph I wrote was sarcastic.
That the last sentence, statement or paragraph I wrote was not intended to be sarcastic.
That the sentence, statement or paragraph following will be sarcastic.
That the sentence, statement or paragraph following should not be mistaken for sarcasm.

(False HTML tagging has become a very common way to clarify tone in writing online. Check the Wikipedia link up top for more info on this one.)

13. Which one of these is not a common (deliberate) misspelling of a word used on the Internet?
pr0n
hay
sauce
tr1ck

(The first three are misspellings of porn - or prawn - hey, and source respectively.)

14. On which day do people post captioned pictures of cats on the Internet?
I think people have got over that.
Several websites, such as icanhascheezburger.com, host competitions once every three months.
Caturday.
Every freakin' day, dude.

(If you pick option (a) then you don't know the Internet very well. I did give half points for d), though, just because it is very true. Every day is Caturday these days.)

15. In 133t language, what does ITT stand for?
"In this thread."
"I tell (the) truth."
"It's timewarp time!"
"I'm talking trash."

(This one might be used as a warning on forums and message boards, e.g. "ITT: explicit content", or "ITT: we go all emo.")

16. What does it mean to 'troll' on an Internet forum?
To present a strong argument that discredits that of another user.
To make outrageous or inappropriate statements in an attempt to offend or incite other users.
To discuss fantasy-based fiction.
To live under a bridge and occasionally eat small children.

(Trolling is often a bannable offense online. Most forums/boards keep an eye on this stuff.)

17. The term "weeaboo" is used online to refer to anyone who is unhealthily obsessed with:
Japanese culture.
Sexually explicit cartoons featuring underage girls.
Sexually explicit cartoons featuring animals.
Nintendo Wii.

(Again, pretty straightforward.)

18. Now, remember that "the cake is a lie" line I mentioned back in the first section? Do you know which recent video game that phrase is a reference to?
Paper Mario
Portal
Katamari Damacy
Halo 2

(Many gamers claimed that you don't get cake at the end of this game. But from what I read, you sorta do...)

19. Which one of these SMS/133t abbreviations is not used to show affection or friendship?
KOTC
PL&
M8
WUWH

(From top to bottom: Kiss on the Cheek, Planned, Mate, Wish You Were Here.)

20. Part of the writing in the above picture has blurred out. It should read, "WARMIN MY _______"
HABEEB
SAGE
HARBL
CAKE

(Habeeb is actually used in the context of "Habeeb It", referring to something which is true whether you like it or not.)

21. Complete the following piece of text, lifted from an SMS someone sent to me, the writer of this test: "I'm so ova my manager. So rude. Total ______... neway, hope ur havin a gud day. xox"
PITA
KHUF
RGDS
BF

(The other three choices wouldn't make sense: Know How You Feel, Regards, or Boyfriend. Whuh? PITA - or rather, "Pain in the Ass" - makes much more sense.)

22. Three of these are common text message and/or 133t abbreviations. Which one is just an ordinary word?
HAND
KIT
GAL
RING

(The first three choices stand for Have A Nice Day, Keep In Touch, and Get A Life.)

23. The term 'smeg', usually referring to something detestable, gets thrown around online a lot. Do you know which TV show it originated from, though?
Red Dwarf
League of Gentlemen
Doctor Who (the original series)
Doctor Who (the new series)

('Smeg' is derived from 'smegma'. UPDATE: JUNE 21. It refers to the gunk that can build up around the head of the penis or the clitoris if not washed often enough - not to semen, as I had originally wrote. This quibble doesn't affect anyone's scoring but thanks regardless to the person below who corrected me.)

24. What does YLBO stand for?
"Young lad/lady (with) body odour."
"You looked better online."
"You like bending over."
"You'll be okay."

(YLBO is a much newer acronym to find popularity, so less people would be familiar with it.)

25. Abbreviate the following sentence as much as would be accepted in common SMS language: "Call you back later, the boss is looking and I need to delete the porn."
CUB L8r, BIL n I need 2 delete the porn.
Call u bak l8r, BIL n I need 2 del the porn.
Call you back l8r, boss lookin and I need 2 del the porn.
Call u bak l8r, boss is looking n I need to delete the porn.

(n, 2, BIL and CUB L8r are all common abbreviations. Del isn't as widespread, and the only options that offered it didn't use CUB L8r, anyway.)

Hey y'all!

Thanks to everyone who took The Beverage Identity Test. As of February 2008, it's had well over 18,000 takers... enough to put it in the 300 most popular tests of all time on this site. The feeling right now is so sweet. Thanks to all of you who sent me nice messages, too! I try to make sure to reply ASAP.

Anyway, since I had so many people ask about what the different categories were, I've decided to post the links here so you can check out all the different drinks you could come out as (I wanted to just post the descriptions right here, but they wouldn't fit in one journal entry). Remember, I couldn't fit more than 27 categories - so some drinks had to get cut (for example, I couldn't put multiple brands of beer, so I ended up just lumping it all into one category).

Anyway, read on...

Milk
Requirements:
alternative: 0 to 35
caustic: 0 to 35
playful: 0 to 35

Hot Chocolate
Requirements:
alternative: 0 to 35
caustic: 0 to 35
playful: 36 to 60

Chocolate Milkshake
Requirements:
alternative: 0 to 35
caustic: 0 to 35
playful: 61 to 100

Coffee
Requirements:
alternative: 0 to 35
caustic: 36 to 60
playful: 0 to 35

Orange Juice
Requirements:
alternative: 0 to 35
caustic: 36 to 60
playful: 36 to 60

Champagne
Requirements:
alternative: 0 to 35
caustic: 36 to 60
playful: 61 to 100

Scotch Whisky
Requirements:
alternative: 0 to 35
caustic: 61 to 100
playful: 0 to 35

A Tequila Sunrise
Requirements:
alternative: 0 to 35
caustic: 61 to 100
playful: 36 to 60

A Cosmopolitan
Requirements:
alternative: 0 to 35
caustic: 61 to 100
playful: 61 to 100

Chamomile Tea
Requirements:
alternative: 36 to 60
caustic: 0 to 35
playful: 0 to 35

A Berry Smoothie
Requirements:
alternative: 36 to 60
caustic: 0 to 35
playful: 36 to 60

Peach Iced Tea
Requirements:
alternative: 36 to 60
caustic: 0 to 35
playful: 61 to 100

Merlot
Requirements:
alternative: 36 to 60
caustic: 36 to 60
playful: 0 to 35

Beer
Requirements:
alternative: 36 to 60
caustic: 36 to 60
playful: 36 to 60

Pineapple Juice
Requirements:
alternative: 36 to 60
caustic: 36 to 60
playful: 61 to 100

An Espresso Shot
Requirements:
alternative: 36 to 60
caustic: 61 to 100
playful: 0 to 35

Long Island Iced Tea
Requirements:
alternative: 36 to 60
caustic: 61 to 100
playful: 36 to 60

A Vodka Martini
Requirements:
alternative: 36 to 60
caustic: 61 to 100
playful: 61 to 100

Green Tea
Requirements:
alternative: 61 to 100
caustic: 0 to 35
playful: 0 to 35

Chai Latté
Requirements:
alternative: 61 to 100
caustic: 0 to 35
playful: 36 to 60

Eggnog
Requirements:
alternative: 61 to 100
caustic: 0 to 35
playful: 61 to 100

A Wheatgrass Shot
Requirements:
alternative: 61 to 100
caustic: 36 to 60
playful: 0 to 35

Ginger Beer
Requirements:
alternative: 61 to 100
caustic: 36 to 60
playful: 36 to 60

Sarsaparilla
Requirements:
alternative: 61 to 100
caustic: 36 to 60
playful: 61 to 100

Shiraz
Requirements:
alternative: 61 to 100
caustic: 61 to 100
playful: 0 to 35

A Bloody Mary
Requirements:
alternative: 61 to 100
caustic: 61 to 100
playful: 36 to 60

A Japanese Slipper
Requirements:
alternative: 61 to 100
caustic: 61 to 100
playful: 61 to 100

So, I guess I know I've well and truly integrated myself into the OKcupid community when I started getting poorly-written slices of diatribe in my inbox. What fun!

Here's the message. I've changed the name of the user to protect his identity, suffice to say I know he's made one of the more successful tests on the site. I should also add that the test he refers to was my Underwear Personality test...


From: idiot test-maker
To: seeyoshirun
Date: Today, 2:33am
Subject: you're dumb

i was thinking what kind of a fag made this test and then i went to your profile. sorry dude, didnt actually know you were gay. i got 'classic brief' no suprise there since you didnt have regular boxers only 'silky' but what the fuck is a male corset? i looked up that Jean-Paul Gaultier you referenced....

all i got to say is you got some fucking problems. you are what's wrong with this world.

#1 cock sucking
#2 wasting precious rescources being alive
#3 go have a beer, pull the dick out of your ass
and get a fucking life.

I bet you've either seen or more likely tried (and failed) to be a model. so congratulations being a dipshit, and rot in hell.

--- END MESSAGE ---

So, my problems with this message pretty much rest solely on the fact that this dude has apparently taken my choice of category VERY PERSONALLY - and not even for the category he scored in! So I mention corsets for men in my test. He didn't score in that category, so what does it matter to him?

Is he trying to tell me that men who wear corsets should be ashamed of themselves? Should they keep their love of corsets in the closet, along with said corsets themselves? Should men who wear corsets be denied the same rights as women who wear corsets? Is he trying to tell me that men are not capable of loving corsets in the same way that women do?

I suppose it also warrants mention that his reading level is clearly somewhere around ninth-grade, given the level of grammar he used to insult me. I also found it fascinating that his solution to my mention of corsets (and I don't wear them myself, I'm just okay with other men wearing corsets out in the open) was beer. Even better - he thinks that fellatio is apparently one of the things that are wrong with the world (I wonder what members of the White House would have to say about that). To cap things off, writing a test about underwear apparently led him to conclude I was a failed model?

Nevermind. It doesn't make much sense. He's been blocked, anyway.

(Today's blog is centred mostly on my experiences living in Adelaide. Fellow Adelaide-dwellers will get this the most, but it applies to anyone who complains about the city they live in.)

So... I was with a friend late last week, out sampling the joys of gelati at Cocolat, and we got to talking about the prospect of travel. Both of us - myself and Jay (I changed the name to protect his identity) intend to head overseas or interstate at some point. When I asked Jay why he wanted to move to Melbourne, his response was to tell me that he was sick of Adelaide and "hearing people bitch about the same things". "Nothing ever changes here - people are so narrow-minded", he told me. This isn't the first - or even the twentieth - time I've heard someone complain about Adelaide. It seems to almost be part of the acceptable code of behaviour for anyone under the age of 25 here. To be in, you have to want out.

What's really interesting about this attitude is what happens to people when they do travel. I always remember a girl I knew - we'll call her Greta - who was helping bid farewell to another friend of mine, Tim, before he headed off to Japan. What stood out about Greta was the way she flaunted the fact that she had travelled there. She would gush things like "Are you going to Okinawa? Oh my god, you HAVE to go to Okinawa!" without really telling us anything that indicated she'd let any of the place soak in. It wasn't celebrating the experience of interacting with another culture - it was name-checking a place she'd travelled to because she needed to boost herself up (Greta really was that sort of gal). Before and after travelling, she was exactly the same girl, and this mentality she developed after spending a year overseas is something I've seen in a lot of people. Travelling didn't change Greta. It didn't change Allan, either, when he moved to Melbourne after finishing his physics major. He'd come back to visit and be just as immersed in the gossip of Adelaide as he'd ever been.

People seem to hold onto this idea that travel is the only way to change themselves and improve their lives. Don't get me wrong, Adelaide may not have as many career opportunities as a larger city - I'm probably going to have to move interstate at some point just because the only large press-related entity we really have in Adelaide is The Advertiser, an entity I find about as appealing as Janice Dickinson. At the same time, though, I'm not down on Adelaide just because it's lacking a bit in the population department. A larger city has more people - but people build cliques and circles of friends as a means to survive, and it's just as easy to fall into the same patterns of gossip about the same things with a new set of friends. I used to find Adelaide cliquish and insular, but that was mainly because I wasn't prepared to venture outside a fairly fixed circle of people myself.

So why do people think that bigger cities solve everything? Granted, travelling or moving out of a city is bound to throw certain things at us that we need to adjust to, and that may cause some changes. But does it guarantee changing how we behave as people? Is that the only way to solve things? If we're feeling stuck in a rut with our work, our friends, our nightspots, is it perhaps possible that we need to change our attitudes, rather than our postcodes? Do we become so convinced that a city is so devoid of possibilities that we end up missing out on things we simply didn't give a chance to?

When our relationship with a city isn't working out, is it their fault, or ours?

There's a certain conversation I've had with more than a few people lately. It's usually started with discussing which actors we consider to be paragons of hotness - at which point I name someone slightly older, and the immediate response from the surrounding crowd is "oh, no, he's too old". I'm not talking about Richard-freakin-Gere, here, either. On one occasion, I mentioned Patrick Wilson, age 32, star of such films as Little Children and Hard Candy - and the response from the crowd was one of general distaste.

Or another situation: I'm actually seeing (not dating, but otherwise involved with) a man in his 30s at the moment. The handful of friends who know the details about this have generally been quite understanding about why someone slightly older might be attractive. One or two, however, were rather stunned - and worried - about the notion of me being physical with someone slightly more than ten years my senior. One such person actually asked me why I'm not attracted to men my own age, to which I had to explain that I am - the current man many be in his mid-thirties, but the one prior was only 18. Age itself isn't the factor here. Both of these men were quite grounded, easygoing, and comfortable with themselves (well, the 18-year-old eventually revealed himself to be a petulant, whiny, brat. But that's another story).

Then there's the classic discussion I've had with more than one friend about the notion of getting older. My compadre Lincoln (who also largely inspired this week's blog) and I were pondering where we'd be by the time we turn 35. We talked about the idea of becoming respective parents, living in England, bringing our respective Jude-Law-lookalike partners along to Sunday brunch while we donned our Prada sunglasses, matching Lacoste polos and Ralph Lauren khaki pants (complete with matching leather slides). In the midst of all this playful imagination, however, Lincoln confessed a certain fear which I'm sure most of us have pondered.

"I don't want to be 40 and dancing with 20 year olds at a bar".

I should mention that nearly every time someone took umbrage at the idea of finding a 30+ actor attractive, said umbrage was taken by a gay man. Same with the response to my dating habits of late. Obviously, the gay community aren't the only people to express an aversion to the notion of getting old - a wealth of Cosmo magazines adorned with airbrushed images of an almost foetal Hilary Duff will attest to that. Throw in ads by Calvin Klein, Clinique, Levi, Paul Smith, Hérmes, Burberry, Lâncome, Lee Denim and any other clothing/fragrance/moisturiser manufacturer you care to mention, and it's obvious that gay men are not the only ones marketing companies are trying to woo with moisturising night cream that stops the seven signs of ageing.

But for us, it's a unique situation. In Adelaide - and elsewhere - there's a particularly pronounced selection of homo-oriented hangouts. With the demise of The Ed, Adelaide is now left with Mars, The Hampshire Hotel, and a certain gathering (myself included) at the slightly more gender-neutral Exeter. These are probably the most prominent nightspots for Adelaide men who like men, and since even the most finely tuned gaydar won't pick up on every same-sex oriented fellow in public, we gravitate towards these locations to improve our chances, or we turn to the Internet. What choice is there aside from that? Sure, we could all wander about Rundle Mall wearing signs that profess our sexuality and our relationship status, which would enable you to wander up to a suitable, single man and say "love me, now", but the odds of this working would still be questionable (while it might come through for some, there's a decent chance that you'd get tasered).

So, getting back to Lincoln's concern - why is it that being in one's thirties is such a scary notion? Why do gay men seem even more focused on this than the rest of the population? Sure, being older and hitting the nightclubs might just be plain impractical from a stamina standpoint (some exceptions aside, many 38-year-olds won't be able to shake their tush on the dancefloor for as prolonged a period of time as their younger counterparts). But still, the mere notion of someone going out and having fun at that age is frowned upon - these more experienced nightclub denizens often labeled as desperate or predatory. Even on gay man's refuge - the Internet - the anti-age mentality sticks out again. Many a 21-year-old's dating profile either explicitly instructs men over age 30 to steer clear, or otherwise sneakily lists the person's ideal age as 18 to 25 years old before requesting that patrons respect said age limit.

So what do we do when we reach that next age bracket and become thirtysomethings ourselves? Are we destined to face the same fate, being passed over by a younger generation when, at least occasionally, we might be denying ourselves a decent friendship here and there? More importantly, why is there such a premium placed on maintaining as immaculate a degree of physical beauty as possible? The men who display these fears aren't stupid - most of them are talented in a way that will ensure them a rewarding career, if nothing else. There's still the prospect of finding someone, too - there will be plenty of other men available, whether my fellow 30-plus peers are looking for sex or relationships. Is that not enough, or have we somehow convinced ourselves that our days in the dating world have an absolute shelf life?

When most of us - gay, straight, or otherwise - are still a long way from getting our lives truly organised, why do we think that life ends at 30?

Rants about the evils of homophobia are a dime a dozen these days. That's less than a penny each. It's an issue that's been addressed by a healthy number of TV series, not to mention a couple of rather successful films. Brokeback Mountain was - to a degree - a culmination of the various efforts before it (even if it AND the excellent Capote were snubbed so that some tired, soundbytes-on-racism-fest by the name of Crash could steal the Oscar, but that's a rant for another day). We all know homophobia is still an issue far from being resolved (heck, the African-American Rosa Parks caused a ruckus in the 1950s for refusing to sit at the back of a bus of white people, and we're still not even over all the racial stuff, either). I wandered towards Supermild last night and got called a poofter by a group of men whose collective level of intelligence was probably only slightly above that of a blueberry muffin. So, sure, homophobia exists. But are a select handful of people - usually macho, fairly thick, heterosexual males - necessarily better than some of our own?

Last Wednesday I was at one of the many, generic coffee places that line Rundle Street, catching up with a friend (who shall remain nameless, suffice to say he wasn't heterosexual). Occupying the table next to ours were a hetero couple. Well, I'm assuming so, anyway - apparently he'd bought her a gift of some sort (a CD, it seemed), and her excited response was to give him a kiss in thanks (nothing inappropriate, mind you - essentially just enough to say thanks). Witnessing this little show of affection, I commented on how sweet it was to see a couple being comfortable with a smallish romantic display like that in public, as opposed to a lesser couple whose idea of romance might be NOT using Wild Turkey as a mouthwash before their make-out session. My counterpart, meanwhile, looked mildly disgusted and commented as such. When I asked why, he replied (to my amazement) "a guy and a girl..." before trailing off.

A few nights later - for once, I was mingling at the Exeter and catching up with a few of the regulars. Again, all shall remain nameless - save for the fact that it was one of those situations where nobody at the table seemed to know more than three or four of the other people present. Again, the focus moved to one of my non-hetero friends, who asked me to outline who I knew of those sitting around us. As I referred to one of the women at our table that he didn't know, I said something along the lines of "don't worry, you'll like her - she's really lovely". I was met with a "women? no, thankyou". This could be mistaken for misogyny. When a date of mine four weeks ago used the term 'breeders', however, it was a lot harder to make that same mistake.

Homophobia is defined as a fear or hatred towards homosexuals or homosexuality. It's easy to spot, because it's usually overt, and there are a number of derogatory words that usually characterise it ('poofter', 'faggot', et cetera). Homosexual men and women may not have the same range of language to use (aside from 'breeder', my tired mind struggles to come up with any other terms right now), but does that mean we aren't doing the same thing? I remember more than one party recently where I've happened upon at least a handful of gay men who seemed to avoid interacting with anyone who didn't share their own sexual preference. There may not have been the same kind of slurs that straight people have traditionally directed at ourselves, but there's still a certain air about such situations that resembles that same fear of, contempt for, or hatred towards people whose sexual preference differs from our own. If we reversed the roles, and it were a group of straight men shying away from gay men or women at a party - or a straight guy disgusted by two men or two women being a little affectionate towards each other in public, that would be considered a form of homophobia. Doesn't that make the earlier examples heterophobia?

What does that mean, then, for our attempts to contest the way in which homosexuals are marginalised? Gay (or, for that matter, bisexual) men and women may not have the same library of words to insult their heterosexual counterparts. But do some of us hold the same attitudes? Regardless of whether we've been insulted, threatened, excluded or hurt by others because of our sexuality, won't doing the same thing back to others - because of their sexuality, or even just for being the opposite sex - widen the gap further? Are we still the only wronged party if we started repeating those same phobic attitudes and behaviours - albeit more subtly - towards others, or towards people who never did wrong by us to begin with?

Even if homophobia came first, is heterophobia any better?