AHEM::::::.To effectively blow my mind you should be:::::::
Taking care of yourself.
Down for me to take you to museums and fancy shmancy art events at least once a quarter. And let me open the door for you so I feel like a man showing gratitude for the presence of a lady not because you can't yourself. (Also If you have a feminist reason for not doing this ill probably fall in love with your educated and progressive stance on gender relations and the archetypal patriarchy that some traditions such as door opening embody as readily as the dowry itself, so I'm cool with that too.)
Also I'm not talking about breaking the bank here no choppers and limos and shit, elitism disgusts me. When we go to the symphony we take the bus or mabey cab. I just like getting exposure to symphonies, art galleries etc. Art is for all classes. Anyone who says different is a brute and I will club them to death.
Have hobbies you like to do on your own or something to make you feel more complete as a person. (Religion, basket weaving whatever so long as it's not just work and drinking and working on your fitness and instagramming your dinner.) Ideally we are talking something you create like music, dance, art, but it can be books, volunteering, whatever.
Enjoy cooking with me sometimes and complimenting food I cook other times. If you like to bake or cook that would be probably ideal.
Running your hands through my hair or face stubble when appropriate. Pretending to be surprised when I grab your ass when no ones looking.
Have a job or a career goal or a vague interest in one of those two.
Take the fuck care of yourself Jesus. Just buying yourself hand stitched burner shit while you ride one drug induced wave to the next is not taking care of yourself. Reading a book or eating a carrot is taking care of yourself.
Wear thongs or something sexy.. At least sometimes.
Wear jackets when you need them instead of always needing to steal mine (this is a hope beyond hope so don't sweat it if you can't handle this one, I kinda like being Macho and offering anyway, ya know fuck it lets just scrap this one)
Like to be or can be around people who drink and smoke even if you don't.
Don't drink and smoke all the damn time.
Do not play world of Warcraft
Do not live your life away from sunshine and moonlight In front of a computer.
Do have a computer phone or tv
Do not talk about only burning man all the damn time (burning man is great, living 51 weeks vicariously through the 52nd one is tragic)
Can meet new people and charm them into a coma when I introduce you. Generally curious about other people and ask questions because you really just want to know and care about others.
Do Laugh at my jokes
Do Make jokes
Do tell me what you want and when I've fucked up.
Do admit when you've fucked up. (Not really holding out for this one either)
Do be down to let me take you on a surprise date that involves you calling in sick and packing particular articles of clothing without knowing where you are headed.
Know sex is healthy and once we are both ready, want a whole lot of it.