Just so we don't start off on the wrong foot, my username is NOT
taken from the erotic romance novel written by E.L. James. This is
an online name I've used since a young age, taken, for better or
for worse, from an album by Staind. So, points off for not being
creative enough to think up a unique username, but hey, it could've
been a lot worse.
Now that that's taken care of... I'm really just here to meet
someone, same as anyone else. I always kinda imagined that I'd meet
someone in school, but now that that's over it's a little hard for
me to imagine where, when and how people are supposed to chance
upon one another. If only life were more like a romantic comedy,
right? I have friends who've had good experiences with online
dating, so I'm giving this a try.
What I’m doing with my life
Moved back to Seattle to start my career. I work as an actuary for
an insurance company in downtown Seattle. And in case you don't
know what that is, since nobody seems to, if you've ever watched
Along Came Polly, it's Ben Stiller's job.
I’m really good at
I'm very good at coping with pressure and stressful situations. It
was a necessary skill for me, cultivated and refined over the years
due to my other amazing ability to procrastinate until the very
last second. Honestly, the only thing that was impressive about my
grades in college was how little effort and time I put towards
getting them in comparison to my more dedicated peers. I used to
get lost on the way to midterms and finals, because I had never
actually set foot in the classroom that semester.
The first things people usually notice about me
A little bit about myself. Just spitballing, I'm very polite to
people I don't know that well, and I try very hard to never
unintentionally insult anyone, or make them feel otherwise
uncomfortable. I generally don't take life too seriously. I am
often described by others as very rational, cynical and genuine. I
often change the topic of conversation to whatever random thing I'm
pondering at the moment. Not in a rude way, just if the current
discussion was reaching it's end. I'm very clean, but not always
neat. My sense of humour tends towards the sarcastic, and is
sometimes a tad mean-spirited, but at the end of the day I'm a
pretty nice guy. Or so I'd like to think.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Too many to name, really. I enjoy most movie genres except horror,
though I do have a soft spot for romantic comedies and superhero
movies in particular. Off the top of my head, Crazy Stupid Love,
Drive, Pan's Labyrinth, 50/50, Casino Royale, Friends With
Benefits, Let Me In, Definitely Maybe, The Departed, Love Actually,
The Prestige, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, The Ides of March, and Up
in the Air are all extremely good.
I primarily watch sitcoms like Friends, Scrubs, Modern Family,
HIMYM, and New Girl. I'm also fond of Broadway shows, especially
musicals like Wicked.
I like to read crime fiction, mostly stuff by Michael Connelly and
Lee Child, though my all time favorite book is probably Speaker for
I'm not very picky when it comes to food. The only common type of
food I don't care for is Thai food.
As for music, I generally listen to stuff that I can sing along
with, which unfortunately means I listen to a lot of
less-than-masculine artists. Muse and Ratatat are near the top of
my list though.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I spend a lot of time pondering philosophical but pointless things.
Other than that, probably just what all guys think about. Girls,
sports, video games, whatever.
On a typical Friday night I am
Probably just hanging out somewhere with a few close friends.
Friday is usually the end of a long week of work, and rather than
letting loose like some people, I usually prefer to just take it
easy and unwind. Partying or clubbing often seems too high-energy
an endeavor, though I will admit that however reluctant I am to go
clubbing, I almost always end up having a good time.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Go ahead and ask. I'm sure I have a few embarassing secrets that
I'd prefer to keep private, but nothing terribly awful comes to
You should message me if
You somehow read through the novel I've written above and still
want to meet up, get to know each other and see where things go.