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30 Des Moines, IA Woman


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 25–38
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 9:22am
Pansexual, Asexual
5′ 3″ (1.60m)
Body Type
A little extra
Mostly anything
Not at all
Atheism, and very serious about it
Graduated from masters program
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Has dogs and likes cats
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I never know what to write here and I know that's a cliche to mention (and that mentioning it's a cliche is a cliche in and of itself). I'm usually the person sitting at a coffee shop doing crossword puzzles and pretending the rest of the world doesn't exist. However, I am secretly longing for someone to approach me and talk to me about idiosyncratic nonsense. Once you start talking to me though I'm off the charts enthusiastic and I've been told pretty entertaining.

I grew up in the punk/hardcore community and it really shaped my life and is something that's still incredibly important to me. In fact, I will go as far to say that if you don't identify as punk/hardcore/metal/insert other random niche genre here then I probably won't want to date you. I have an aversion to normal and the tendency to sappily (drunkenly) say things like "Punk Rock Saved My Life" as if I truly mean it.

I'm sarcastic, goofy, and talk a mile a minute and love to tell stories and argue politics.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm teaching and tutoring at community colleges.

I'm moving back to Des Moines at the beginning of August after spending 9 years in Chicago. It's a big change but I love Des Moines and want to be by my family (me and grandma are ringers on the BINGO circuit)

I love to go to shows and do karaoke and go out to eat at new restaurants.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Picking things up with my toes.

Writing literary criticism.

Remembering the lyrics to every crappy song ever.

Dancing like a doofus.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!

Tattoos. Specifically my leg sleeve. It's really bright and I'm constantly getting stopped on the street so people can look at it. Or my horrible batman tattoo because people think I have some sort of gaping wound on the top of my foot.

Big cheesy smile.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Edgar Allan Poe, Borges, A lot of Russian Lit, Richard Wright, Dune, Raymond Chandler, lots of ridiculous Young Adult fantasy novels. My skin has become the tapestry through which I express my love of books and I have tattoos from: Alice in Wonderland, The Golden Compass, To Kill a Mockingbird, Where the Sidewalk Ends, Pippi Longstocking, Where the Wild Things Are, and The Wizard of Oz.

I read a ton and reading is very important to me. My goal is to read 150 books this year. If you wanna see what I'm reading you can check this out:

Movies: Back to the Future, Pee-Wee's Big Adventure, Princess Bride. I basically get bored by super intellectual movies and can't watch anything sad because I cry too much, so if we stick to weird comedies I'll be good. Don't even try to make me watch a horror movie. I can't stand that shit.

Music: Misfits, Dead Kennedys, The Cramps, X, Talking Heads, Sleater-Kinney, Bratmobile, Pissed Jeans. My music taste is actually pretty diverse and I listen to whatever strikes my mood at the time. I love to rap at karaoke and think that the members of wu-tang can do no wrong. I just listed the punk here because I'm lazy and it's my go to. I also really love pop music and 90s/early 2000s r&b. Blu Cantrell's "Hit 'Em Up Style" is my anthem so don't cross me.

TV: The Wire, Antique's Roadshow, Dateline Mysteries, Drunk History. Anything Joss Whedon does. Simpsons seasons 3-10. I've seen every episode of Beverly Hills 90210 a million times. Considering a "Donna Martin Graduates" tattoo.

Food: I eat garbage. Absolute garbage. I think I have a couple boxes of corn dogs in my freezer and like a lot of american cheese. Grease, grease and more grease. ALL THE GREASE. Put it in me.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Books
2. My Dog
3. Sarcasm
4. Batman
5. My Family
6. Karaoke
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
What other people are thinking about.

How the guitar solo from "We Are 138" is simultaneously the best and worst thing.

How bored my dog must be all the time.

For a really serious answer: Lately I've been thinking a lot about intersectional feminism because of my masters thesis research and how important it is for everyone who considers themselves a feminist to read about intersectionality. I'm disgusted and appalled at the way black women have been pushed out of the feminist movement. If you meet me, I will probably talk your ear off about stuff like this so if you found your eyes rolling at the mention of this or your brain glazing over, then you probably won't like me.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Trying to figure out something to do. I'm new to the town and have been away for a long time so let me know what's cool again!

I also am in like 3 book clubs already so probably reading and cross stitching. I have the interests of an old lady.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm listed as being in a "Domestic Partnership" with my dog on Facebook.

I watch The Vampire Diaries every week.

I like to go to Bulls games but only to watch Benny the Bull do his thing because dude is hilarious!

I accidentally checked mandatory on "Evolution has no place in schools" oooops

I haven't ridden a bike in 7 years and didn't learn to ride until I was 21.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're into punk and maybe want to go see a show.

You want to try a new place to eat and don't have anyone else to go with.

You don't think feminism is a dirty word. I don't shave! SCARY right? Not really, it's pretty luxurious.

Adding some caveats here because I'm getting so very close to deleting this thing:
"I wanna have sex with you forever. Be my wife" is not an appropriate means of introduction. Never message me this or anything like it.

If you start off with "greetings" I will think you're an alien.