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slowave

30 M Seattle, WA

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–32
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Jun 13
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Asian, Middle Eastern, Black, Native American, Indian, Pacific Islander, Hispanic / Latin, Other
Height
3′ 0″ (0.91m)
Body Type
Curvy
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Not at all
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and very serious about it
Sign
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Dropped out of space camp
Job
Retired
Income
More than $1,000,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t want kids
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Poorly), German (Poorly), Spanish (Poorly), French (Poorly), Swahili (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
It would seem that the less effort you put into this orgy of indifference, the greater the return, but I'm going to wax irrelevant all over you anyway. Keep on reading, (potential) internet friends.

I'm a financially inept idealist with aspirations to explore the wonder of the universe, while being human in it. I've come to appreciate that I have a deeply seeded curiosity for the profound mysteries of existence, and that shouldn't be ignored. I plan on going back to school for Physics, once the requisite logistics fall into place. It's the closest possible thing to going to Wizard School, except you can never bathe or sleep. I want to be on the cutting edge of ideas and pursuits that could fundamentally change our understanding and mastery of reality. Yes, I figured this out without smoking anything. Ideally, I'd like a day job as a researcher of high energy/particle theory, which would encompass things like string theory and its derivatives. By night I will rock the fuck out.

I love music with a passion; it is life, and I plan on making it an active part of mine, even if that means simply continuing to write about it and go to a positively prodigious amount shows. I don't discriminate by genre and have never been able to hone in on a single type of music to pursue creatively. If anything, music production is probably the route for me, since I'd be able to work in a variety of genres. I'm a scene bandit, and everyone who makes and supports good music is part of the same scene.

Listening to shitty music because someone told you it's cool doesn't make you an ironic uber-hipster, it makes you retarded. I absolutely don't care who takes offense with that. I'd rather listen to Gilbert Gottfried rake a car alarm across a blackboard, then shove the whole thing up the butt of a screaming cat. Like any art form, music is incredibly personal, but there absolutely exist vast swaths of aural "stimulation" that are objectively capitalistic horseshit. If you're listening that sort thing (or all too often subjecting every hapless soul within earshot to it) as a fashion statement, not because you derive sincere pleasure from it, then you've failed. Also, clubbing is for douchebags; shows are for people who know how to live.

I enjoy ufology, cryptozoology and other fortean fields often consigned to the "pseudoscience" academic waste bin. Some day, I'd like to publicly try to take some of the stigma and taboo out of these subjects. There's a lot more to the universe than we perceive and understand, and we need smart people thinking about these things. If you disagree, then you're a philistine and you should wear more tinfoil. I'm neither a staunch, skeptical jerkoff, nor a card-carrying member of the "I want to believe" club; balanced skepticism and a scientific mindset is the right way to approach these things.

At the risk of sounding completely full of myself, I'm probably one of the nicest people you'll meet. I have so many karma points that the universe has hit an integer overflow. I'm a mensch, you schmuck! Fuck politics, fuck religion, fuck money, fuck law; can't we all just do the right thing? The fact that these things give our society structure and motivation (particularly money) and/or sow depravity and tragedy (particularly religion, not to confused with personal spirituality) is depressing. Star Trek is how the galaxy should be. Well, except for those Borg assholes. It ought to be obvious at this point, but regardless of what OkCupid's oracle of personality quantification (aka that procession of exponentially more obnoxious and irrelevant questions) will tell you, I am, in fact, a progressive dude. Just have a look at my "ethical" answers; the algorithm behind the scenes has its head up its ass.

A successful life is about art, passion and love. Don't confuse passion for obsession and love for lust. And don't confuse art for Kanye West; someone give that asshole a Grammy already, because he's clearly the best of the worst.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
If you see someone walking down the street, reciting Pi continuously, to an indefinite decimal place, that's me. Nobody fucks with me.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
observational comedy, facebook vandalism, higher mathematics (terrible at lower mathematics), abstract/spacial reasoning, deduction (no pipe necessary), learning languages, sketching (boobies), fixing the malevolent computer machines in my life, 2D Capcom seizure-fests, dodging pink bullets, blowing that mysterious shit out of cartridges, button mashing on the Wii, dancing (hypothetically), playing music in my head all the fucking time
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm not a very good ninja

I'm a gentleman, I'm an asshole, I'm a stylish motherfucker, I resemble the world's most iconic perpetually awkward teenager to drunk douchebags, I resemble the world's most implausibly awesome scientologist to cool people, my musk, I'm a magnificent weirdo
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: the internet

Internet: food

Food: music

Music: The Books
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
emerald cities
a veritable cornucopia of unreasonably cheap Asian cuisine
friendly mosh pits
obsolete technology
the Drake Equation
gleeful profanity (but be judicious with your f-bombs)
Occam's Razor
dyscalculia
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
necromancy, espionage, cryptozoology, copyright infringement, amateur martian cartography, cultural vandalism, hobo fashion, ontology, pugilism, vigilante justice, proctological haberdashery
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
spelunking, kosak dancing, skydiving, jousting, bushwhacking, cock fighting, mind fucking, jay walking, dog sledding, squid wrestling, chainsaw juggling, cow tipping
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Whenever I see someone on the street wearing headphones, I imagine they're listening to "I'm Too Sexy," by Right Said Fred.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
...you actually read half the crap I wrote.

...you spelled your fucking name right: http://j.mp/mAgt8k

...you're not a pedophile: http://j.mp/Imo5aS

...you'd like to weigh in on the polarizing subject of Kanye West and/or make sure I do, in fact, find him to be an epic douchebag and paragon of glorified mediocrity.

I may be sporting a discouraging red/orange bar up above, but rest assured I WILL read whatever you send me. I get roughly one message every three months because I have a penis (which is otherwise pretty convenient, for the most part). If I don't get back to you, it's not because I think you're a douche; I might just not be that interested, but sometimes I just fuck these things up. Evidently, I'm somewhat more inclined to send a timely response if you insult me, for some reason.

My only two unconditional deal-breakers are, and always will be, religious zealots (science is real, deal with it) and Uggs. I'd add those who are pathologically incapable of appreciating music, but they're probably mostly a subset of the aforementioned castes of imbeciles.

I may have made a mockery of my side panel, but I was, in fact, serious about being drug and alcohol free. I don't give crap what you partake in, so long as it's in reasonable moderation and doesn't involve anything abjectly destructive. I also did, essentially, drop out of Space Camp (Florida is the phallus of North America).

If you feel like stalking me instead, then head on over to twitter: http://twitter.com/the_slowave

Do it; I don't give a damn.