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24 Whittier, NC Cis Woman

Cis Woman

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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 21–40
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 7:21pm
Native American, Hispanic / Latin, White
5′ 2″ (1.58m)
Body Type
Used up
Strictly anything
Atheism, and laughing about it
Gemini, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Mostly non-monogamous
Has dogs and has cats
English (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Bouncing between partial explanations. Nothing is definitive enough. This whole thing is cumbersome and awful, I apologize in advance.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm a former political organizer around issues of labor, reproductive health, and social and economic justice. I work as a paraprofessional for individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities now. I think I'm the sort of person who wishes they could be really good at a bunch of things, but really, my only major skills are empathizing and knowing how to talk real good. I used to say that I didn't think that discussing my work was a good way to clarify anything about myself and that hearing only about what people study or do for money is boring and reductive, but it's hard to avoid if you really throw yourself into something. With that as a disclaimer, what follows is a litany of gerunds that may or may not clarify anything pertinent about what I actually spend my time doing.

That is, writing, reading, learning, tending to a small but growing family of succulent bbs, making the most of suddenly living in the middle of fucking nowhere, eschewing the affectations that come with being learned in critical theory and the humanities in favor of being a Person in the World, probably killing my liver, leering at mid-century modern furniture on Craigslist, loving my dog forever, trying to pick and stick to a hobby because I've never really had one before, posting Mariah Carey videos on Facebook, and other things that are equally boring (????).
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
cooking, baking, talking to strangers, being absolutely direct in my language, writing letters, making lists, staying absolutely still and absolutely nude in front of complete strangers while they draw me, singing to folks in the car, making mix CDs and thoughtful gifts, being clumsy and generally embarrassing myself constantly, memorizing random facts, losing one half of every set of earrings I own, being late to everything all the time (Saint Patricia, Our Lady of Perpetual Tardiness), not finishing my knitting projects, not finishing books, handy human things, and ball busting. Frankness, kindness, openness, cutting real deep and getting to the truth of things.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
It's rather exhausting to try to suppose anything at all about other people's intentions or perceptions and I'm no longer in a place where I want to pretend to know, but I'm certain I have a very firm handshake and that's probably enough.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
A bunch of lists that are too long because I can't make a choice to save my life:

Books: Middlesex, White Noise, Americanah, Delta of Venus, Breakfast of Champions, Fun Home, Blue Nights, The Year of Magical Thinking, The Easter Parade, The History of Sexuality: Volume One, Crush, Bastard Out of Carolina, In Watermelon Sugar, Antigone, Goethe's Faust, Woman, Native, Other, Being There, Strike Sparks, The Best American Erotic Poems: 1800s to the Present, The Zigzag Way, The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao, The Pleasures of Cooking for One, A Light in the Attic, 15 Views of Orlando. All things bell hooks, José Muñoz, Flannery O'Connor, Michael Cunningham, Gloria Anzaldúa, Adrienne Rich, Cixous. Currently reading The Master and Margarita (Mikhail Bulgakov) and Manual of Woody Plants (Phil Cordelli). Issues of Bitch Planet as well. I choose which to read based on where I am, what kind of mood I'm in, and what I'm doing otherwise. This system nearly guarantees that I never finish anything, but occasionally, I beat the odds. Frankly, I try to be fair-minded, but I'm quite skeptical of all men who only list books written by male writers in their favorites. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Movies: Kicking and Screaming (1995), Adaptation, Enter the Void, Wizards, Blue Velvet, Duck Soup, Eastern Promises, Don't Look Now, Deconstructing Harry, Love and Death, Fellini's Amarcord, Hiroshima mon amour, Double Indemnity, You're Next, Before Sunrise/Sunset/Midnight, Weekend (2011), Rosemary's Baby, Rashomon, Spice World, the Evil Dead trilogy, Fargo, Last Tango in Paris, Coffee and Cigarettes, Arsenic and Old Lace, It Happened One Night, The Graduate, Mulholland Drive, Bringing Up Baby, Taxi Driver, Cinema Paradiso, Manhattan Murder Mystery, Funny Girl, Harold and Maude, A Very Long Engagement, Suspiria, North by Northwest, Vertigo, Notorious, Rear Window, An American in Paris, Roman Holiday, Barry Lyndon, Full Metal Jacket, Do the Right Thing, Being John Malkovich, The Omen, Reality Bites, You've Got Mail, Leaving Las Vegas, Goodfellas, The Departed, Clue, The Cat Returns, We Need to Talk About Kevin, The Bodyguard, Boogie Nights, The Last Days of Disco, The Goonies, Wayne's World, Frances Ha, Shut Up and Play the Hits, Singles, Beetlejuice, Addams Family Values, Heathers, Serial Mom, Dogfight, Mystic Pizza, Romy and Michele's High School Reunion, A Fish Called Wanda, Blue is the Warmest Color, Obvious Child, Wetlands, Nymphomaniac, Flawless, A Late Quartet, Particle Fever, Inside Llewyn Davis, High Society, The Last Waltz, Wild Combination: A Portrait of Arthur Russell, Gerhard Richter Painting, Short Cuts, The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover.

TV: Breaking Bad, Mad Men, Orange is the New Black, The League, Lost, Bored to Death, True Detective, Game of Thrones, Felicity, Freaks and Geeks, The Golden Girls, Parks and Rec, Twin Peaks, Big Love, Veep, Bob's Burgers, House of Cards, The X-Files, Laverne & Shirley. When I was in college, I wrote a ten page paper for my Advanced Feminist Theories class which was at the time hastily titled "Skyler White, Queen of My Heart," if that gives you an idea of how much I love Breaking Bad, and I am unashamed to say that Felicity helped me through one of the most traumatic periods of my adult life, so here we are, I guess. Whatever, fuck it, I only care about Malcolm in the Middle, tbh.

Music: Arthur Russell, Nina Simone, John Cale, The Modern Lovers, Robyn Hitchcock, Judee Sill, Julia Holter, Julianna Barwick, ABBA, Sparks, Low, Antony & the Johnsons, Galaxie 500, Angel Olsen, Grace Jones, Sinéad O'Connor, Billy Bragg, Belle and Sebastian, Carissa's Wierd, Built to Spill, Simon & Garfunkel, Archers of Loaf, The Weakerthans, Pedro the Lion, Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds, Ted Leo and the Pharmacists, Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston, Kath Bloom, Mount Eerie, Elliott Smith, The Microphones, M. Ward, Mirah, Joni Mitchell, Tammy Wynette, Michael Hurley, The Band, Vashti Bunyan, Elvis Costello, Sparklehorse, KMD, Hüsker Dü, Pavement, Stereolab, The Replacements, Neil Young, Neko Case, My Bloody Valentine, Slowdive, Pulp, Lush, Slint, Codeine, Can, Beat Happening, Joanna Newsom, Television, Son Lux, The Spinanes, Talulah Gosh, Sam Cooke, Funkadelic, PJ Harvey, Björk, Marissa Nadler, Jawbreaker, Cap'n Jazz, Rainer Maria, Prince, Portishead, The Promise Ring, De La Soul, Black Sheep, Guided by Voices, Kurt Vile, The Clean, Yo La Tengo, Asobi Seksu, Devendra Banhart, Cat Power, Julie Doiron, The B-52s, Blondie, The Magnetic Fields, Martha Wainwright, Leonard Cohen, J. Mascis, Waxahatchee, Mount Moriah, FKA twigs, Mazzy Star, Dolly Parton, Chet Baker, Chelsea Wolfe, Swans, Grass Widow, True Widow, Pharmakon, Grouper, Smog, Karen Dalton, Mary Lou Lord, Harold Budd, Brian Eno, Cocteau Twins, Townes Van Zandt, Gillian Welch, Patsy Cline, Drop Nineteens, The Breeders, Erykah Badu, Aphex Twin, David Lang, Savages, How to Dress Well, Joanna Gruesome, Twin Shadow, Dusty Springfield, Bronski Beat, Erasure, Sky Ferreira, Deafheaven, Heavenly, Laurel Halo, Holly Herndon, Perfume Genius, Linda Perhacs, Boards of Canada, Nils Frahm, Peter Broderick, Mark Kozelek, Sharon Van Etten, Nat Baldwin, Emmylou Harris, Dionne Warwick, Jenny Hval, Lizzy Mercier Descloux, Larkin Grimm, Lucrecia Dalt, Songs: Ohia, Ceremony, Fuck, Perfect Pussy, Hildur Gudnadottir, Little Annie, Woods, Kevin Morby, The Babies, Buffy Sainte-Marie, The Thermals, Sonic Youth, Parquet Courts, Courtney Barnett, Mitski, Lucrecia Dalt, Ibeyi, Xenia Rubinos, Vince Staples, Eskimeaux, The Wipers, Dean Blunt, Girlpool, etc. etc.

Podcasts: Mystery Show, Lore, You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes, Plz Advise with Molly McAleer, Call Your Girlfriend, The Allusionist, Serial, Dear Sugar, This American Life, blah blah blah, white nonsense.

Food: Fuck. Oysters every way, hot wings, lamb, pho, all of the cruciferous vegetables, Sonoran hot dogs, tamales, raw lasagna, Maille dijon, panang curry, collard greens, chirashi, Black Russian bagels, rye bread, Indian buffet food forever and always, beets, avocados, chia pudding, dark chocolate. All things salty and herbaceous and overwrought. I had one great experience with a bacon-wrapped goat cheese stuffed jalapeño and one terrible one where I ended up with my mouth under the faucet in my kitchen feeling as though I'd been betrayed by a lover. I'm not the same.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My asceticism increases week to week. I'm not sure I have six things anymore.

- Reliable Internet access.
- Coffee: Hot, strong, black. This is not an innuendo.
- A good book to stave off vestigial social anxiety.
- Mementos of my dead grandmother, the maudlin soul I am.
- Coconut oil for everything else.

Consumption and more consumption. Oh well, okay.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Institutional -isms, micro-aggressions, funeral arrangements, what I'm having for dinner, things I want to make, why my tastes make me seem like a junior at Evergreen State in the late 90s, the nature of cognition, the formation of (the) self, how to effectively support folks with disabilities without speaking FOR or assuming need, the potentiality of radical community-building in rural areas and what it would look like, how much I wish a lounge singer would romance me with Roy Orbison covers, and other things that make no sense.

"It takes guts to be gentle and kind."
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Hanging out with my de facto boyfriend, an eight year old Weimaraner heartbreaker doggy genius named Haans. Wine in the bathtub with Broad City and a homemade coffee scrub. I'm a recent transplant from a big swamp to the hinterlands, so my "typical" is still fairly insular.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I've been told I suffer from "paralysis by analysis," so take that as you will. I wish I could make all of this a long photo essay to explain to you how I really feel. Most of this doesn't mean anything. Most everything ((here)) is a joke I tell myself, showing, not telling, with a curious dearth in adjectives ascribed.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're Jonathan Richman, c. 1980. Guess that's a long shot, huh? Alright, just tell me something I haven't heard before and I guess we'll be square. I'll talk your ear off about some or another thing, too many thoughts trailing off with too many words, and you might like it or maybe not. Isn't that just the way it goes? Anyhow, we probably won't get along very well if you don't support a fairly radical approach to social justice or if you don't like my dumb jokes, but boy, what a time it could be to try! (I probably won't try.)

Oh, and if you know anything about wheel throwing and wanna reenact that scene from Ghost!! Just kidding, but I really do want to start making pottery and ceramics, so I guess I'm not joking? It's a mystery even to me! Or if you wanna talk about how the new Mount Eerie record made all yr drone dreams come true, but that's probably even more unlikely than meeting THE REAL Patrick Swayze on OkCupid. Hyperbole and then some, but you get it. Honestly, though, shared aestheticism isn't a great demarcator of potential compatibility, so if you don't like Mount Eerie or really anything I've mentioned in this obnoxiously lengthy profile but like other cool shit and want to tell me all about that instead, that could be neat too.