Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


40 Chicago, IL Man


Similar users

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 30–45
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Online now!
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Not at all
Scorpio, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Entertainment / Media
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Likes dogs and likes cats
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
it's true - i'm kind of a snarky bastard. i lived in south korea for 3 years, which was swell. lived in los angeles for the decade prior to that - it's a sunny place for shady people
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
putting a bird on it
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
attracting odd people on okcupid, apparently

refusing to sleep with women who wear ugg boots. or listen to mumford & sons

taking 'which sex and the city character are you' quizzes (i am SUCH a samantha)

not needing google to beat you at jeopardy

chess / crosswords / scrabble - the nerd trifecta
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
you mean BESIDES the whole devastatingly handsome thing?? then i guess probably my resting bitch face
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
lily allen, tegan & sara, half japanese, sia, lorde, garbage, brian jonestown massacre, jack white, radiohead, ween, talking heads, david bowie, depeche mode, eminem, st. vincent, fiona apple & many other hysterical waifs

the colbert/daily show/bill maher triumvirate, transparent, broad city, vice, masters of sex, better call saul, forensic files, charlie rose, frontline & anything involving NASA. oh - or DINOSAURS!

all things kubrick, woody allen, the andersons - wes & pt, darren aronofsky, danny boyle, christopher guest, david fincher, 'amelie' & anything qualifying as a documentary

almost exlusively non-fiction. i subscribe to vanity fair, have giant mancrushes on christopher hitchens & neil degrasse tyson and can mount a solid argument the 'autobiography of malcolm x' is the greatest book ever written

i've eaten spiders in cambodia, but wouldn't eat a chicken mcnugget with a rifle to my head
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
coffee. strong & black - like my men


my passport

music/internet/assorted apple devices

fun facts: the word 'vagina' comes from the latin meaning 'sword holder'
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
why anyone with a vagina would consider voting republican

why 87% of women on okcupid identify as 'bacon-enthusiasts'

why comedy central would completely shit the bed by letting colbert, stewart AND john oliver go, while hiring larry wilmore & trevor noah. who are mediocre at best. with the fucking wind at their backs

if the symptoms for 'religious' & 'schizophrenic' are exactly the same, then . . .
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
dancing around in my underwear to sia's 'chandelier'

why - what are YOU doing??
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
when people start chanting 'u.s.a! u.s.a!' - i'm so embarrassed i pretend i'm canadian
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you are smart, funny & the right amount of the right kind of crazy

you are not religious - nor will you be afflicted with it in the future

you got the memo about the world not needing any more children

you are elizabeth warren. seriously, liz - hit me up