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28 Longwood, FL Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–36
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My details

Last online
Jul 18
6' 2" (1.88m)
Body Type
Space camp
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
My blood type is Fireball. I won't make lampshades out of you or openly rip ass for at least the first three dates.* I spend my Sundays beating my chest and yelling at a television while wearing the fervently devout overgarment of my people. I'm not against dating women with children, but I will spoil them and turn them against you with an abundance of junk food and Nerf guns. I prefer women with generous proportions and a stalwart IQ, but I find that the smarter ones tend to rival Ed Gein's mentality, so if you're an idiot then that's cool, too.

If you view my profile and fail to bestow me with the pleasure of a greeting, an army of fire ants will descend upon a fuzzy, adorable kitten in some far away land. Please note, I have no control over this; it's just the nature of these things.

* Subject to change without notice.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Checking my OkC inbox.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
...winning at tummy swords.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I would gander this wonderful face that only a mother can love.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Anything historical or historically-based and military. I also like Michael Crichton books.

Movies: Debbie Does Dallas.

Shows: BBC Top Gear, Mail Call, Jeopardy.

Music: Acid Bath, Alice in Chains, Wumpscut, The Rolling Stones, Infected Mushroom, Hans Zimmer, Brother Dege, Tool, A Perfect Circle, Combichrist, Candlebox, The Agonist, ZAO, Audiomachine, E.S. Posthumus, Born of Osiris, Loreena McKennitt, Blackmore's Night. A pretty eclectic mix. I can tolerate anything but rap.

Food: Everything but shellfish.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Internal Combustion Engines
2. Music
3. Hydrogen Hydroxide
4. The Dallas Cowboys
5. Gojo
6. My ludicrously amazing boxer briefs.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Fantasy football and huge boobs.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
...pseudo hitting on the toothy, neck-bearded waitress at Waffle House after a classy night of binge drinking.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm on OkCupid. I'm on Fet.

...I. Killed. Mufasa.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over. want to.

Or you have a generous bust, tattoos, glasses, drink moderately, like rock music, and think that a Dallas Cowboys jersey constitutes "sexy time" garb.